Like a spider weaving a web, our stories of who we are cover us like a second skin. The methods used by the acceptance and commitment therapy community and other mindfulness based methods will help you alleviate psychological suffering as you become more flexible in your own thinking.
No one seems to want to talk about it or do anything about it, but sometimes watching porn can be a problem. When it is, psychology has had nothing to offer that was empirically tested. Until now. It is counter-intuitive, but it works.
Thoughts cause our actions, or do they? We need to stop treating out own minds with the automaticity of tying our shoes or any idiot with a microphone has access to buttons to control us. In between agreeing with thoughts and disagreeing with thoughts, there is a middle path. In the noisy culture we have created we need to learn how to get there.
I received this message a few days ago from someone involved in the ACT work. It was a message so painful and yet courageous I thought some might find comfort and support from it on this important day: Between the ages of about 5 until about 8 and a half I was sexually abused on almost a daily basis. Throughout high school I had panic attacks and was dissociating. Today I am alive. I'm not just going through the motions. I can have relationships with people. I can feel the rain, and the sun...
What makes us most human is what we care about. In a word, what matters most are our values. The problem is that what we care about is also where we get hurt – so we tend to hide out from our own caring. We keep it from others – if we are really good at it we keep it even from ourselves. If you've been holding back from life, what you need to do can be summarized into a single word.
Horror and judgment in the modern world is restricting our ability to find peace of mind. It is no wonder we are seeing a resurgence of interest in acceptance, mindfulness, and values. We need to learn how to create a modern mind for the modern world.