Whatever You Do, Stop Sliding In(to) Marriage

There is no magic bullet when it comes to committed relationships. But if we know how to build a good foundation, success and happiness are much more likely to happen. The worst we can do is sliding into a type of relationship that is doomed. Take a stance. Stand up. It is hardly ever too late.

Happy Mothers

Happy mothers-what does it take? We have one of the most demanding jobs in the world, yet when it comes to recuperation, you'd be surprised how little we actually need....

Why Good People Break Bad

The bad can take us by surprise. Our man or woman can act out for no apparent reason. We may find our very own hands in the cookie jar. Why? Why do good people go bad? Find an honest, science-supported answer and learn how to prevent... "breaking bad."

Happy Adolescents

Happiness is always a possibility for those who commit and acquire the necessary know-how. Albeit it is especially challenging for adolescents. Their brains change so furiously, how can they and their parents keep up? Attitudes about this stage have to change. And then comes the approach, teenager approved...

The Zen of Love

What propels a person to leave the beaten path and try something new? We seem to be predetermined by our early experiences, especially when it comes to abuse and neglect. Yet, some people free themselves of their conditioning and leap into something they have never encountered: love. Little do we comprehend when it comes to leaps, but what we know may just be a good start.

Five Ways to Access Your Unconscious Intelligence

Overthinking kills our intuitive sense. Find out how to relax and trust your gut feelings to your and other people's benefit. Soon enough, you are going to burst with creative solutions....

Seeking Perfection? There's a Better Way.

I want the best for myself and my children. Why settle for less? We live in a society of plenty, so we often simply go for it and ask for exactly what we want. An almost inaudible, but powerful voice inside of us might tell us to reach for the best and only for the best. Is this always a good choice though? Is getting the best making us happy? When is it detrimental?

3 Ways to Stop Ruining the Moment

Everybody wants to be happy, but countless studies show: Avoiding unhappiness is more important to us than finding happiness. The moment we consider something to be emotionally risky – from small changes to big love – we tend to turn away from it. We also tend to think the good to death. Here are three ways to remove these hindrances to the moment:

Honest Now, Why Aren’t You Smiling?

Why we rather not spread happiness and what to do about it: “Smile and the world smiles with you.” Smiles disarm. Smiles make us look attractive. In short, smiles spread happiness. So, why aren't we smiling more often? Is it really only because we are tired or not in the mood? How a little honesty can change your life...

Do You Have A Balanced Life? Does Anybody?

Nothing ever stays the same in life, so the balanced life does not need a particular thing or particular skill. It does need, however, a very good mind. Here are three ways to cultivate such a mind.

Is Your Mind Too Full To Be Happy?

These days, mindfulness attracts many people interested in psychological health and happiness. Since Paul McCartney encouraged us to “Let it be” when our hearts are broken, we know about the importance of acceptance. But mindfulness is hard, especially when the mind is too full. Learn three practical ways to unclutter your mind and invite happiness.

What’s Wrong With You For Not Reaching Happiness?

We have a pretty good idea about what happiness is. What hampers us more than anything is the notion of having to reach a perfect state before allowing us to feel happy. Who is giving us this message, and how can we free ourselves from its power over us? Find out here....

4 Benefits of Hugs, for Mind and Body

Hugging feels good, but it is also good for us. It may even free us from cultural conditioning and feelings of fear and shame. Hug yourself and others to happiness, health, and freedom. This blog was inspired by my experiences during the World Congress for Psychotherapy 2014 in Shanghai, China.

Four Ways To Turn Passive Complaining Into Healthy Behavior

Complaining is annoying, unproductive, and inherently unhealthy. Is this true? While this opinion is growing in popularity in pop psychology and New Age, science paints a more complex picture. Positive change often begins with wimpy whines, but has the chance to trigger big, positive changes. Learn how to take your complaints to a higher level.

The Origins of Laughter

We take ourselves and the passing events in our lives way too seriously. When we relate to life as a divine play, we become really good players as well as a joy for others. Laugh and signal to the world "all is good and well"—at least in the deepest sense.

What, You Worry?

We find ourselves worrying and worrying for no good reason. Why is that? How can we change that? Ask more good questions and you might just find the remedy that works for you.

When Days Fly and Life's Short

Time flies. But does it have to? Our relationship with time determines how we live the moment. As we better our relationship, we become kinder to our precious presence and thus to life.

The Antidote to Lying and Keeping Secrets

Holding secrets or outward lying is not only painful, but hampers our growth. This is harder to see when the uncomfortable truth is subtle or seemingly concerning only you personally. Learn to set yourself free and grow towards the light with the antidote of "Facing and Embracing" from the new Zen Psychology.

The Ultimate Happiness Plan

You like to be happy, but need a plan. Happiness is not just feeling wonderful all the time. It is "being here", fully participating in this life. The "Ultimate Happiness Plan" offers ten grounding, uplifting steps, doors of entry. Science, common sense and Eastern wisdom all support this plan of action.

The How of Striking a Balance for a Happier Life

A beautiful wave of interest in Eastern practices is sweeping over the West. However, whether or not this wave will crash and vanish on dry land will depend on our willingness to learn and integrate Eastern ways authentically. Find a healthy balance, open up and learn.

How To Become Brighter Than Your Genes Suggest

So you think you can think....We tend to believe that we have stable selves, stable personality traits, morals, and especially stable intelligence. Yet in truth, everything is subject to change and variation. Even though we do have a genetic disposition for intelligence, we are not predetermined. We can make a difference, and here is how.

What's Love Got To Do With It?

It really is astonishing what love can do for us, science has confirmed with the Harvard Grant Study. Why is it that love makes for happy, healthy, and successful lives? And what can we do if we weren't loved as children? The message is clear. It is never too late for love.

Remain In The "Now" While Pursuing Your Goals

In the age of anxiety, it is difficult to remain centered and connected to what matters the most while following your worldly goals. There are no easy fixes, but there are great pointers from both psychology and the Buddhist philosophy of how to be ambitious and present-minded at the same time. First, ground yourself in reality...

How to Increase the Likelihood of Life-Changing Insights

Sometimes change comes about slowly, step-by-step. Other times we are hit with sudden, split-second insights, with shifts in consciousness, with "Aha!" experiences that just happen to us. While these shifts are wonderful mental accidents, we can help to increase the likelihood of their occurance. Get ready for your Eureka moment! You might just change your life in a blink.

Cognitive Optimism Versus Zen Wisdom

How can we see life more positively without constantly trying to manipulate our inner experience? Zen wisdom is based on a way of life that includes passing negative experiences. While it is good to correct negative, faulty thinking, it is better to eliminate the cause of that thinking.

The Zen of Parenthood

Find out what makes you a happy or unhappy parent. Happiness is based on individual choices and characteristics, but there is scientifically based knowledge available and, of course, common sense.

Are You One-Of-A-Kind?

The topic of being or not being one-of-a-kind is a difficult one. Don't rush to a conclusion. Instead, become still with yourself and ask yourself ten questions. You might just get an idea.

The Ultimate Gift of Love

How can we invite lasting love when everything is constantly changing within reality? We so quickly get used to the "good" in others while getting annoyed with the "bad" that we once vowed to accept. Familiarity can lead to boredom, closing doors. Find out how to keep the doors between you and your lover open.

Your Brain Is Like a Liver

We cannot escape our body. Even our consciousness serves the body, assuring its survival. Thoughts are amazing and responsible for amazing things, but their power is limited. What to do about our human condition? What about freedom? Is there hope for us?

How to create a ripple effect in your and others' lives

Our happiness depends largely on our ability to be still. However, we also need to learn how to initiate change by taking small steps and beginning to love the path more than the goals we pursue. Both Zen and psychology can help us refocus and eventually not only cause a ripple effect, but be a ripple effect.