I’m a writer who’s recently discovered a joy in cutting down on the number of words, disjointing the logical connections, putting it all to music, and drawing the expression out of me (draw = with paints and photoshop and no “long drawn out process”). Two weeks ago I posted a video about writing, here, and yesterday I posted one about female aggression, here.

This video below is about an egoist who is comforted by her concern for others.

Before falling asleep the other night, one side of me said to myself, “You’re so self-centered.” The other said, “No: You care too much about what others are thinking to be simply self-centered.” In that dreamy state I thought about how hard it is to distinguish between my being concerned for others and my impulse to prove to others that I’m concerned for others.

Videos have been fun places to play with not-fully-formed thoughts about the vicious or darker of my psychology, or the psychology of the girl protagonist, Clara, in the novel I’m trying to write and from which these videos come. The videos are a fun medium for darkness now--because the videos themselves are short and colorful. The drawings and pop music here counterbalance the sadness and darkness that is almost sinking my novel.

About the Author

Ilana Simons

Ilana Simons, Ph.D., is a literature professor at The New School as well as a practicing therapist.

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