Life Long Learning

he Buddhists refer to such a state of openness as “beginner’s mind.” They regard this orientation as the curiosity of a child’s mind, and believe that it is an enlightened way....

A Good Marriage Is Better Than Therapy

A loving marriage can heal old emotional wounds more effectively than the best therapy. At its best, psychotherapy creates a warm and understanding relationship.
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The Ecstasy that Comes with Balance

My husband and I have interviewed is that one of the reasons they are enjoying their relationship so thoroughly is because they are fluid, experimental, and creative....

The Bandwagon Effect

The bandwagon effect is a psychological phenomenon whereby people do something primarily because others are doing it, regardless of their own beliefs.

Sublime Stretching

Negotiation is the process of communicating back and forth for the purpose of reaching a joint decision.

In the Eyes of the Beholder

Many of us toss around the notion of "the truth" as though there is an incontestable, objective "reality" and that we know what it is...

30 Practices to Boost Well Being

There is a strong element of choice in our level of happiness. Indeed we do decide to be happy, but that’s only for starters. Then we are challenged to cultivate happiness.

Feeling Lost? Part 3

When you begin to master the tasks of the wanderer, caregiver, warrior, and orphan, you move into the intimacy stage. All along we have had unpredictable episodes of intimacy.

Feeling Lost? Part 2

In a committed relationship that means a great deal to us, it’s not so easy to walk away when difficulties arise.

Feeling Lost?: Part 1

The path of a committed relationship is challenging and rewarding. It helps to have a map of the terrain so that we can find our way.

In Kindness Will I Speak

In due season will I speak, not out of season. In truth will I speak, not in falsehood...

Seven Factors Comprising Resilience

We often feel like the vase in the kiln that we are being baked alive, angry at our predicament or angry at who we believe is victimizing us.

Want to Keep Love Alive? Here's How

There is an idea going around that you may have heard, that-long term relationships eventually and inevitably become flat and boring...

No Confessing Our Partner’s Sins

For so many of us, the tendency to think in judgmental terms and to see ourselves as a victim is strong.

Ultimate Limit Experiences

Ultimate limit experiences are situations that must be faced consciously with courage and resolution, and that push us to the limits of our endurance...

In the Belly of the Beast

There is no part of any one of us that is inherently negative or bad. Even our most destructive impulses can be transformed into compassion and wisdom through our willingness.

Making Romance Last, Part 2

Novelty is characterized by newness, freshness, unconventionality, unfamiliarity, difference, imaginative, creativity, and innovation.

Making Romance Last: Part 1

Enlarging our comfort zone is good for us as individuals and terrific for us as a couple. Our life becomes more interesting and creative.

Breakthrough or Breakup

A breakdown is a usually unexpected interruption in a relationship that leaves one or both people feeling, upset, angry, disappointed, hurt, or in some way incomplete.

Commitment and How To Grow It

Having the assurance that the commitment in the relationship is strong and sturdy provides a large playing field to struggle with the essential issues that every couple must face.

Making a Molehill out of a Mountain

We don’t have to believe everything we think. We can choose to accentuate the positive by doing what works and focusing our attention on that which is fulfilling.

Victim

"Pain is no one’s fault." - Wayne Muller... Whether or not you agree with this statement, it’s pretty likely that there has been a time or two, or more, that it didn’t seem true.

What Does It Mean to Do Your Own Work?

Here is a reason why we use the phrase "doing your own work" so often.

Love Is like a Butterfly

"Happiness is like a butterfly, when pursued is always beyond our grasp. But if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." - Nathaniel Hawthorne

Marriage Can Heal Old Wounds From the Family

Sometimes, the greatest lessons that we learn in our family of origin have more to do with what we don’t want than what we do.

The Best Preparation for Marriage

Great relationships aren’t discovered; they are created.

Forgiveness Part 3

Her transformed self-image has been earned and hard-won. She has become a courageously outspoken advocate for and an inspiration to many men and women...

20 Ways for You to Get Closer to Each Other

Happy couples are skilled in the art of attentive listening. They allow themselves to be penetrated by each other’s words and feelings.

Forgiveness Part 2

Monica found her way to forgiveness the hard way, the way many people do, by experiencing pain and betrayal.

Forgiveness Part 1

Beginning at the age of ten, Monica was frequently sexually assaulted for a period of more than six years. The assailant was her father.

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