Linda: Happy couples are skilled in the art of attentive listening. They allow themselves to be penetrated by each other’s words and feelings. They don’t simply receive information, but are informed by it, and frequently change their behavior accordingly. When one partner expresses discomfort in response to the other’s request for more closeness, a simple remedy for bridging the distance between them is to institute periods of committed listening. It can make all the difference.
When a partner is able to patiently accept the other’s feelings, opinions, and desires, and is able to override his (or her) own impulse to be in the spotlight, the relationship will thrive. His willingness to show up to honor his partner’s needs deepens the level of trust and respect that they hold for each other. As trust grows, there is a willingness to reveal even the most tender emotions. Here are some practical tips for becoming a black belt listener:
And remember to enjoy the process.
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