Honoring the Rule of Reciprocation

Most of us learn over time to go to great lengths not to be considered a freeloader or a parasite. The rule is so strongly ingrained in us that we can be vulnerable to having this tendency used against us by others who wish to exploit or take advantage of us in some way.

Yes, It Really Is Possible To Avoid Arguments. Part I.

When faced with a threat to our ability to influence or control our place in an important relationship, ancient fears can be activated that awaken memories or trauma from previous experiences in which others who possessed greater authority than ourselves may have exploited our vulnerability or dependency on them in ways that were hurtful or damaging to us.

6 Reasons Why Married People Should Have Better Sex Lives

The belief that singles have more and better sex than marrieds has become a cultural myth that researchers and sociologists are finding to be untrue, and coming up with some hard evidence to substantiate this claim.

Even True Lovers Sometimes Feel They’ve Fallen Out of Love.

Maybe I’m kind of crazy myself, but I can’t help it. Our relationship is the most important thing in my life and when we’re not in sync, it’s hell. And when we’re connected, it’s heaven.

Why Little Things Are Worth Getting Upset About

“Take it easy. Chill out. Relax. Cool down. Don’t stress out. Lighten up. You’re making a mountain out of a molehill. It’s not a big deal.”

How to Rebalance an Out-of-balanced Life

As many of us have learned from experience, knowing what you “should” do, or what you have been told you “need to do” isn’t always enough to get yourself back on track to what it is that you really want to do.

The Crucial Factor in Making Real Change in Your Life

Disrupting just one unskillful behavior, for instance using silence to punish, or making critical, judgmental remarks, or being bossy by giving commands, can lead to a whole series of positive shifts.

Great Relationships Require Hard Work, But Not Forever

Relationships, we think, should not have to be this hard. Well, that’s true. They shouldn’t be relentlessly difficult, at least not on a permanent basis, otherwise who, other than a masochist would consciously choose to live in a state of perpetual struggle.

Consider These Terms of Engagement Before Your Next Argument

Remember that it’s not the differences themselves that damage the fabric of trust and respect in relationships, but the unskillful ways in which we react to them that do the most harm.


Trusting the possibility of reconciling even the most difficult of relationship impasses and knowing what that process entails, gives us the hopefulness and motivation to develop and practice new skills.

Marriage Preparation

The good news is that you don’t have to have had a great track record in the relationship department or in your personal family experience in order to develop the skills and character traits that enhance the likelihood of success in relationships.

Old Guys Rule!

It has been shown that children have a higher level of self-confidence when grandparents are involved. This stability can significantly affect children’s academic, psychological, and social development.

Is Love Really All You Need?

The Beatles were on the money with almost all of their songs, but on this one, I’m afraid that they got it wrong.

Is Technoference Wrecking Your Love Life?

Electronic devices are reported by many couples to be the source of arguments especially when used during meals and at other times when there is a hope or expectation that there will be an opportunity for meaningful interpersonal relating.

A Little Good News for a Change

Many studies have shown that couples who enjoy long-term, fulfilling relationships, also tend to experience enhanced self-esteem, clarity of life purpose, a tendency to view things optimistically, and generally, better health.

Confessions Of A Recovering Control Freak

You know them. You may even live with them. You deal with them every day. You may be married to one. You may even be one. They are the dreaded…. Control Freaks!

Why You and Your Partner Need to Unplug

Confronting technoference in your relationship: The risks involved in developing an addictive relationship with technology and encouragement to take steps to become less compulsive.

13 Ways to Keep Love Alive

Since May is Date Your Mate Month, here are a few ideas you might want to consider. Try some of these and add your own creative touches to the process of keeping romance alive! Taking time out of our busy lives to make sure that the intimate aspects of our relationship are thriving works wonders for the partnership and our lives as a whole.

Research Proves Money Can't Buy Happiness

See if you can identify the kinds of qualities that you will want to strengthen and develop in yourself in order to be able to bring about the outcome that you desire. Give some thought to the kind of behaviors and practices that will support the development of these qualities.

Why Tough Love Can Be the Best Thing for Your Relationship

“A failure to confront is a failure to love.” —Scott Peck When it comes to dealing with broken agreements or with emotions that arise between people that need attention and understanding, there is no such thing as “no big deal.”

Why Relationships Can Never Be 50-50 Propositions

A personal relationship is so much more than its business aspects. We can work to cultivate a more mutual generosity and trust between us. When couples are in the rhythm of giving to each other, they are sensitive to each other’s needs, and get great pleasure from bringing happiness to each other.

The Truth About 'Dealbreakers' in Relationships

One of the most frequently asked questions that we get from our readers and students is “What are the deal-breakers in relationships?” “Deal-breakers” are those behaviors or conditions that one partner is unable or unwilling to tolerate in a relationship.

Smiling at Fear

I’m remembering the words of Swami Satchidananda , who was fond of saying that we can’t stop the waves from coming, but we can learn to surf. Hang ten!

Mind Over Matter

“Mindfulness is not something that is only done in the meditation hall, it is also done in the kitchen, in the garden when we’re on the telephone, when we are driving a car, when we are doing the dishes.” Thich Nhat Hanh

Do You Believe in Miracles?

Love create miracles!

Got Happiness? If Not, Try What Slough Did

What is unique about the Making Slough Happy experiment is that it is the first (and so far the only) study of a community in which a significant number of participants have consistently engaged in practices over an extended period of time that have produced a.....

Mastering the Art of Relationship Yoga

You probably didn’t log on to this website to read about yoga, but trust me, there’s a connection between the subject at hand, and the theme of this blog, and that, in fact, is the point of this post, and the point of Yoga: Connection.

Has Technology Hijacked Your Quality of Life?

Don’t settle for contact; go for connection! Much of what motivates us to go on-line has to do with a desire for personal contact. While there’s nothing wrong with making contact with others through electronic media, contact alone isn’t sufficient to fulfill our need for meaningful connection.

Looking For Approval In All The Wrong Places?

To heal means “to make whole” and unless we come to terms with our brokenness, we can’t experience ourselves as whole. When we regain the experience of wholeness we become more able to trust the validity of our own experience even when others opinions contradict it.

When Couples Discover Uncomfortable Truths

“It’s not that I don’t love you. I still do, but we’re just so different in so many ways."