On Splitting, Anger, and Getting Stuck

The BPD world can contain a lot of splitting.

The World of the Borderline Mother--And Her Children

Clinician Christine Ann Lawson, Ph.D. developed four distinct types of people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) in her book Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship (2000).

"Upbeat Dad" Lives the Sweet Life After High-Conflict Divorce

High-conflict divorces can ruin body, mind, and spirit. But there is a way to survive--even thrive. One combat veteran says, "It doesn't matter how bad things may be, forgiveness is the key to moving on and letting go of the hurt. Even if you're dealing with heartbreaking issues such as domestic violence or infidelity, it really works."

Boundaries in Action: What to Do About Disagreements

He wants to eat dinner earlier than she does. And he has a personality disorder. Here's an example of how to limits without arguing.

Prognosis is Gloomy for Children with Personality-Disordered Parents, Studies Suggest

Children of parents with personality disorder are exposed to a combination of risk factors and are at greater risk of emotional, behavioral, and somatic [physical] problems, studies say.

Recovered Borderline and Author Rachel Reiland Embarks on Radio Tour

"As far back as I can remember, I knew there was something wrong with me. Something no one could ever understand. I wanted to run and hide in shame. It was like trying to slam a lid on top of a volcano to keep the lava from hurting people around me..."

Borderline Disorder in Men Overlooked, Misdiagnosed

Once borderline man says, "The out-of-control sex was something I hated myself for, it was obsessive, it felt like an invisible hand grabbing me by the collar and dragging me off to do whatever. I needed to cause enough pain and degradation to myself."

New study shows clinician attitudes about BPD (and borderline patients) differ by experience and type of clinician

A hot-off-the-press study shows that attitudes about BPD (and borderline patients) is more complex than you might think. Among other things, social workers and psychiatrists are positive about treatment while staff nurses still have low empathy.

A Self-Described "Strange Girl" Talks About Borderline Disorder and Dialectical Therapy

"Borderline means you're one of those girls who walk around wearing long sleeves in the summer because you've carved up your forearms over your boyfriend."

Happy Second Edition, Stop Walking on Eggshells!

Whatever you think of Stop Walking on Eggshells by Paul Mason and Randi Kreger, you can't deny its influence. While most reviews are positive (an average of four-plus stars) those who didn't like it felt that way for totally opposite reasons. What else would you expect for a book about splitting?

Canadian Mental Health Association Takes on Borderline Disorder

Borderline is one of the most misunderstood mental health disorders, something local officials hope to change in March with the first of four mental health forums.

Do family members of people with borderline disorder have enough compassion?

Online articles about those with borderline disorder (BPD) have garnered some bitter comments from people who have someone with BPD in their life. Often, these comments are condemned or ignored. Should we dismiss these posters or take a deeper look at what's behind them?

Responding to Hostile Emails from High Conflict Personalities

When dealing with a high conflict personality--especially during divorce--nasty emails from both directions are common. For best results, never send one. And use the B.I.F.F. technique, developed by attorney Bill Eddy, to respond to them. Keep your responses brief, informative, friendly, and firm.

An End to Narcissistic Personality Disorder In DSM-5?

While you can take narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) out of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (the clinician "bible" published by the American Psychiatric Association), you can't take NPD out of those who have the entrenched disorder.

Are people with personality disorders responsible for their actions?

Someone asked me, "My wife acts very abusively toward me. On the one hand, you're saying I should hold her responsible for their actions. But on the other hand, she has a real mental disorder. So which one is it? Does she suffer from a disorder she didn't deserve, or should I hold her accountable for her hurtful behavior?" The answer is, "both."

Popular BPD Treatment Not a Miracle Cure

I am not against Dialectical Behavior Therapy—I refer the right patients to it all the time. But we need to take a closer look at what the treatment can and cannot do, and why.

Breaking Up with a Borderline/Narcissist is REALLY Hard to Do, Part 2

You've tried to make your relationship with a borderline or narcissistic person work. But it's become clear to you that leaving is your only choice. Following is the second half of my article on why breaking up is so hard to do, and how you can make it easier on yourself.

Breaking Up With a Borderline/Narcissistic Partner is REALLY Hard to Do, Part 1

You're hurt, disbelieving, and angry. At first, you loved the way your borderline and/or narcissistic partner looked at you with admiring eyes and filled that empty void within you. Their insecurity and neediness inspired your determination to be that one special person who was going to fix them for good. Now you feel tortured and empty.