Your Life After Trauma

For trauma survivors the thought of living a big, brave life may seem far fetched. A new book provides an essential blueprint for going forward with confidence.

Ready, Set….D'oh!

If you’re like me, all the things (from sick days to snow days to unexpected assignments and broken appliances) that can derail our days can make it feel like we weren’t meant to follow through on our resolutions and good intentions. When a fresh start becomes a false start, how do we recommit to our goals?

Missing Those We Love at the Holidays

After spending so much of our lives trying to put things together – getting married, having kids, building careers – in pursuit of a complete picture of how things should be, when we come around to holidays or milestones we pause and see what we’ve built and what we haven’t, what we’ve lost and can never get back

How to Overcome Fear of Water

46% of Americans are afraid of the deep-end of a pool. 37% are unable to swim, and almost 4000 a year die of drowning. How can we help the millions of fearful swimmers learn to enjoy the water safely? —We must address the fear first. Anyone who enters the pool overwhelmed by fear of embarrassment, failing, being out of control, or who goes into flight/fight mode, can't

Words to Live By

When life feels complicated and overwhelming it can be grounding to have a few words to live by to go back to. I love this by Glennon Doyle Melton: Just Show Up. Be Brave. Be Kind. Rest. Try Again. A mantra can clear anxious thoughts and replace with purpose. What words do you live by?

Learning from the Bravest of the Brave

Ever since September 11, many of us have felt nervous at huge public events, uneasy in the press of a large crowd. But all around us were men and women in uniform.

Transforming "I Can't" or "I Don't" Into "I DID IT"

"I too, have always feared diving but haven't thought about it my whole adult life. I declined to learn to dive as a child, too scary. Last night I wandered into a free swim clinic at my health club. Had no intention of going beforehand. At the end of the class, the teacher said we would dive now. I was ready to walk out but..."

Do You Have a Fear of Commitment? Or Are You Over-Committed?

We all have commitments that are non-negotiable. And obligations we got roped into. But can we commit to things for our own sake—exercise, fun with friends, new experiences—and accept no excuses? Whether you have a fear of commitment or say yes too often, how to make room for the RIGHT commitments.

3 Ideas for a Summer to Remember

Before you know it, "Any plans for the summer?" will become "How was your summer?" Here are 3 ways to make it unforgettable.

How to Finish what you Start

I know what kind of person I’ve always been. Easily excited, easily distracted, chronically overcommitted, and so on and so on…until now.

A Parent's Worst Fear

We’re afraid of our kids dying when they’re small and vulnerable. We worry about aging parents and loved ones who are ill. We prepare for terrorism at public events, we pray for no shootings at schools, we hunker down for natural disasters. But what happens when the tragedy you don't expect strikes?

Are You Preparing or Procrastinating?

In learning new skills those of us who struggle with anxiety often prolong the "research" phase as long as we can before trusting ourselves to perform them solo. Being well prepared is a great way to combat fear, right? Yes, unless the preparation itself takes you to more "what if" scenarios that cause more fear and require more preparation.

How to Put the Brakes on an Anxiety Attack

I had an anxiety attack the other day while test riding a bike on a Brooklyn Street. I'll admit it, I'm afraid of biking.

The Only New Year's Resolution You Need

This is the time of year when everyone wants to know "What's next?" If you're anxious about the unknown, failure, what people will think of your answer, the question can spark more dread than excitement. How to find freedom in 2014 by approaching New Year's Resolutions in a new way.

Mandela—The Power of Choosing Optimism Over Despair

Often when we feel defeated, we have no idea what the cost to the world is. We just accept things as they are. Nelson Mandela, by remaining optimistic, determined, and tireless, changed all of these people’s lives, created a new future for his country

Holiday Travel and Fear of Flying

My friend R.O. hates to fly. "I've cried...I've tried medication, wine...but it's just awful." But on her most recent flight she did something different on the descent. She talked to herself in a

Psychology Today Recommended Reading

Bookshelves are filled with tales of extreme survival, courage and reinvention. Can't relate? Patty Chang Anker tells a story for the rest of us - those of us still terrified of riding a bike or or speaking in public.

Which Fear to Face First?

"I have so many fears. Where do I begin? Which fear is worth facing? Which one can I handle? What if I fail?" Start by creating your Index of Fears. Mine includes Aging, Ax murderers, Becoming Boring, Biking (bikejacking, crashing, gathering speed), Blood, Breaking Bones, Bullies - and that's just the letters A - B!

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