I have been hearing a lot lately about something called the "Divine Feminine" and the "Awakened Masculine". It is like these terms are  being used all over the place to describe some kind of erotic enlightenment.

Just the other day - David, a  dear friend and mentor wrote to me. David is such a wonderful teacher and always touches my heart whenever he talks to me.. Sometimes when we speak he shakes me up and sometimes, I can feel his soft kisses on my fore head.

His letter was in response to a note that I sent out to my friends about touching a place in myself spiritually that I called "true surrender" in the pools of Harbin Springs in California.. He told me that he was so incredibly moved by my words that he felt his entire body respond.

"When I read your piece last week about the surrender at Harbin, I felt my entire body shake....this is the true Goddess... the Divine Feminine... so rare in this world... all these pretend goddesses, these little girls playing dress-up... it's cute, but... when I encounter real surrender, it's an absolutely unmistakable presence this is the realm of She Who Births the Worlds...Enjoy, relax, get to know Yourself... linger as long as you like..."

I must have read this over and over again. Could that really be true of me? Is that what happened to me? Did I truly touch the "Divine Feminine" in myself?  I wondered if my journey through the world of sacred sexaulity had in fact been all about finding this place in myself. But what was this place in myself again? The divine what?

Was my quest so intimately laid out in my book Shameless really about  learning how to put into balance my Masculine and Feminine Energies? Geez. I had no idea!

It sounds so well - "New Age" - and  I have never worn a bindi in my life! I am way more  typical mid life housewife than anything.  I wasn't even sure if I could  speak this language let alone understand it.  Could I have had an experience without learning the lexicon?  Is that what happened to me - that I finally learned how it feels to truly embody the Divine Feminine?

Okay - I know that some of you that are reading this are now retching. But I wanted to explore this more! 

So - I went on a quest to try and figure out what is meant when we talk about the Divine Feminine! I signed up to attend a workshop in Sedona in April to see if I could really understand all of this.I wanted to go deeper!  And then I called the folks who are running the workshop to see if they could help me understand what everyone is talking about!

Caroline Muir the Founder of the Divine Feminine ~ Awakened Masculine Institute, Joan and Tomas Heartfield who direct the school were wonderful and came directly to my aid. I asked them if they could explain all of this to me. And they tried....

"The essence of the Divine Feminine is the spark of life that everything grows from. The same energy that grows a plant grows us. The divine feminine is the innate body, heart, gut, and wisdom that all human beings have within them. It is our ability to sense, feel and intuit our highest options.

Unfortunately, we have lost touch with this natural ability in western civilization. Religions have exhorted allegiance to what might be called supernatural love, union with the transcendent Logos as the incontrovertible spiritual ideal. For the most part, we are not taught to think or feel for ourselves, but to simply believe what we are told.

Lost, even buried, in this one-sidedness has been the warmth and substantiality of natural love, the immanent presence of Eros at the heart of each cell in creation. Other names for the universal recognition of this dynamic benevolence are Qwan Yin, in the Chinese Tradition, The Great Mother of Aboriginal Renown, The Great Goddess of Western Paganism and The Blessed Mother of Christianity. In each instance, a personally recognizable expression of the Divine Feminine is active in our lives. These aspects of the divine feminine stress the values of caring, acceptance, intimacy, empathy, compassion, and love.

The worldwide emergence of women (normally thought of as the carrier of feminine energy) as the undeniable determining force in our social equation is becoming common knowledge. From the pioneering Women's Consciousness Movement in the United States, to women's ongoing, and increasingly visible struggle for civil and religious freedom throughout the world, the planetary social order is progressively and rapidly being shaped and influenced by women, and their unique feminine consciousness.

Along with the awakening of the divine feminine, we have seen the less-than-divine or un-awakened feminine. We see plenty of movies and television filled with catty, sarcastic, insecure, envious, jealous, bitter and resentful women...and men. But how else can we understand the value of bringing forth the divine feminine in ourselves unless we see the opposite?

In the same way, the feminine is waking up to her divine qualities and offering these gifts to the world, so the masculine is awakening to a new (actually old) way of being with the feminine. Anthropologists such as Riane Eisler recognize that partnership societies in which the feminine and masculine were equally honored were the norm until approximately 3,300 years ago.

The awakened masculine aspect of us, which is our ability to acknowledge what we know from our own experience, rather than from what we are told, understands the importance and value of the feminine aspects. As the divine feminine's protector and champion, the awakened masculine is willing to explore emotional availability, compassion, receptivity and erotic innocence and expression. He is in service to the awakening divine feminine. The awakening masculine supports the feminine aspect in visionary women and men, so they can bring their gifts into the world. He values and cherishes sexual energy, and uses it consciously. He invites sex, and takes both yes and no for an answer--rather than uses superior strength and force to dominate.

The un-awakened masculine aspect has a vague idea of his purpose, but cannot really speak it. He lives in fear, but cannot identify the source. He is subject to the influences of the mainstream media where his ideas of reality are reinforced. He is one who is caught in what he's been told all his life, and has never re-evaluated his belief systems. He is in a survival or autopilot mode much of the time. Happiness comes in bursts, but he may have difficulty expressing it. When he is unhappy, he looks outside himself for the cause. He is intimidated by what he doesn't understand, and may criticize it freely. His belief systems are mostly fixed. His sexual appetites drive him, but they never really nourish him. He relies on sources outside himself to define his reality. The un-awakened masculine aspect is always trying to control everyone, and passes judgment on all those who think differently. They shun or even kill the ones who have different beliefs.

A cosmic game, it seems, is afoot. The long-dormant energies of the Divine Feminine are awakening, and beginning to permeate all aspects of our lives. This sacred feminine consciousness teaches us the more refined arts of sexual love, and reveals the healing and wholeness that await us as we reclaim our passion and inner authority as evolved women and men. Thus, the essential link is remembered as the "God-ness" within. It comes forth and transforms the mundane into the sacred. As we learn to surrender to this energy, we receive the inner guidance we have been looking for, which enables us to awaken to sustainable, everlasting love and passion in our lives."

Wow. I started to think about my own journey, and I do think that David is right. I do believe that I was finally able to touch the Divine Feminine in myself. Perhaps, in the first time in my life - I let go of my ego and my fingers unclenched. I didn't even know that they were clenched...but they had been energetically clenched for a long time. It's something that I see in so many of my female coaching clients. It's as if our feminine energy is tied up in one big hard ball.

I am wondering about this workshop that I am going to - and what more I will uncover in myself. There is always something to uncover - something to learn.
In the past, I had separated myself from my body on so many levels...I covered my beautiful shape with flesh so that no one could see my physical beauty and I closed up my desires. It was only through touch that I began to be able to leave my mind and get in touch with my body. It was only through touch that I got to know the true needs of myself as a human being.

What I have learned  is when my mind is not in a place of running the show...my body goes into a place of balance and harmony and then my soul can be in a place of Divine Peace.

Now, as far as being in the realm of She Who Births The World....

I am not sure about that - the stretch marks must be terrible!

About the Author

Pamela Madsen

Pamela Madsen is the author of Shameless and founder of The American Fertility Association.

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