Sex, Secrets, and Shame

Should the government criminalize fantasies? Many people already feel ashamed of theirs.

Pamela Anderson & Shmuley Boteach: "Porn is for Losers"

An anti-masturbation clergyman and a Baywatch actress join forces to promote a moral panic.

Sacrificing Reality to Sexual Politics

Exaggerating or inventing stories to bolster social justice movements will eventually undermine social justice.

A Couple Quits Therapy; What Is “Normal” Desire?

When is a lack of desire a problem to fix, and when is it a reasonable response?

National Men’s Health Week

Let's talk about sexual health--without focussing on STDs

“Politics? I’m Interested in Sex, Not Politics.”

Think your sexuality belongs to you? Think again. Thousands of laws regulate every aspect of our sexuality.

Open? Poly? Beyond Affairs and Cheating

"Open" and "poly" relationship arrangements have a lot to offer--and they're complicated.

Does Pornography Demean Women?

Some porn may be ugly or distasteful. But the idea that it "demeans women" is essentially a rejection of female sexuality.

Ten Erection Disappointments That Are NOT “ED”

Didn't get an erection last time you wanted to? You probably don't have "ED"--maybe it's just unrealistic expectations.

No Mabel, You DON'T Have to Compete With Porn Actresses

Comparing yourself to porn actresses--and feeling resentful? Here's an alternative.

The Dirty Little (Sex) Secret of Therapy

Patients should be safe assuming that therapists understand sex as it actually is, don't believe discredited myths, and can discuss anything.

Limiting Abortion to Healthy Fetuses?

To make a point, states are criminalizing abortions that don't exist.

"Pink Viagra"—No It Isn't

FDA approves Flibanserin—and the search for sexual desire continues.

Eleven Facts About Sex I Wish Judges & Lawyers Understood

The justice system requires knowledgeable judges and lawyers. When it comes to sex, most aren't.

Is Everyone on Match.com Looking for a Match?

Many people use dating sites to window shop. Their mates, however, may not be amused.

Study Confirms: IVF DOES Drive People Crazy

Who defines "infertility"? And who's protecting the sex lives of infertility patients?

Indiana: Where "Freedom" Requires Discrimination

"Religious freedom" was never intended to exempt people from legal obligations.

Another Guy Who Isn't a Sex Addict

"Sex addiction" is a very poor way to understand people.

After an Affair, What Comes Next?

Before attempting reconciliation after an affair is revealed, each partner should describe the relationship they'd like to have. If they can't agree on what they would like, there's little to reconcile.

Bad Categories Prevent Smart Conversations

If unwanted, non-threatening verbal contact is "violence," that trivializes real violence--and makes it impossible to discuss solutions intelligently.

Attacking Sex Trafficking by Attacking...Who?

According to the government, the number of people sex-trafficked in the U.S. is quite small. Why does an activist industry insist that "millions are at risk"?

Going to College? Here's Practical Sex Advice

Many college students relate to sex as if it's scarce--and their current opportunity may be their last. Having sex under unpleasant, dangerous, or ambiguous circumstances not only limits pleasure and dignity; under new federal guidelines, it invites a whole new set of punishments.

Memo to All Incoming College Students About Sex

Your teen desperately needs some advice about sex before heading off to college (or to another year in high school). If you only get a few minutes, what do you say?

Sex Tips For Wedding Nights

To create enjoyable sex, you don't need exotic techniques or the perfect body. What do you need?

Talking My Patient Out of a Boob Job

I didn't exactly talk her out of it, but I did help her understand she was just trying to feel less powerless. That led to some profound conversations with her boyfriend.

Better Sex: Porn or Women

Sex with a partner is still among the best things life has to offer.

Sexual Gifts for Our Patients

Each year we give our patients many gifts. Here are the sexual gifts my patients most appreciated in 2013.

Symptoms of Sex Addiction? No (Part 1)

American sexuality often looks just like "sex addiction." It isn't.

Criminalizing Oral Sex In Virginia

Conservative politicians, religious leaders, and decency groups insist on maintaining a moral panic around sexuality that sustains a climate of fear and danger.

Humanist of the Year: Dan Savage

Dan Savage challenges a fundamental belief of marriage counseling. Are we listening?

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