Death and Memories of Close Friends

I want briefly to share thoughts with you about close friendships and losses and sadness. However, what's meaningful to me may or may not be meaningful to you.

I find it tough to lose a friend to death. I miss my lost friends. I miss sharing memories.I miss the fun times we shared and our solemn moments. I miss their companionship. I miss our talks. I miss their kindnesses and support. I miss their integrity. I miss their wisdom. I miss their honesty. I miss what I cannot adequately convey in words, this thing we call friendship.

Friendships are mutual. I'd like to think I also meaningfully contributed to the lives of my friends.

A death of a close friend is a bitter sweet experience. The loss is bitter. Sadness also is sweet because of memories of shared joys and of sticking together in tough times. It is only because our connections with our friends are meaningful that sadness envelops loss.

Sadness is about allowance. It's allowing yourself to experience sadness without fear. It's allowing yourself to weep or not, as you experience yourself experiencing the loss. Here, allowance is a prelude to acceptance.

There is no right way to grieve a loss. Your brain and mind regulates such matters. Have a sad thought, and feel sad. How your body responds reflects your individuality.

We normally suffer a profound sadness over those we love when they die. That is as it is. It is part of being human. We make attachments and experience sadness when a friend dies. That is as it always has been.

In the earliest Cro-Magnon days, our ancestors covered the graves of their loved ones with beads, tools, and flowers. Neanderthals showed similar sentimental feelings.We remain attached to our human heritage.

Here is a poem I wrote about the threads of life:

The threads of life are thin and strong.
At first we see them go on and on.
But with the movements of the clock,
The threads unravel and are lost,
And we are gone like pictures etched in frost.

The loss of a friend is a sad reminder of the meaning and limits of life. What would your friend want you to do with the remainder of your life? What do you want to accomplish?