Want to have your partner really hear you? Do you simply need to be heard? Is what you have to say so important that attention must be paid? If so, here are five approaches that simply won't work:
You’ve stated your case and your partner has politely listened. You finish up and you get…no real response. You hoped for engagement, but what’s going on in your partner’s head instead is unclear—or worse, you fear it’s negative. Resist the temptation to repeat your case: If you want engagement, instead ask follow-up questions like, “Do you agree?” or “What do you think about that?”
Sometimes we want something so much, or feel something so intensely that we can get in the way of our own best interests. But no matter how strongly you want to communicate something, your partner will best hear and respond to you if you are simultaneously showing that you are still conscious of his or her needs.
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