I have been apologizing since my son was born-before I ever knew what NLD was or how it would impact the rest of my life. I have felt guilty and inadequate as a parent. I have made excuse after excuse, justifying Indigo's actions, personality, learning style. I have made countless apologies.
I have apologized for Indigo's inability to read, write or comprehend multitask directions; loving people too much, not respecting boundaries; over-excitability; incessant talking...
And then, I have apologized to Indigo for everyone else.
But the one person I forget to apologize to is me. I forget to tell myself:
Exhausted yet? Apologizing sucks the life out of me.
It took me a long time to realize I shouldn't apologize for Indigo and my parenting style. Took me a long time to realize it wasn't my responsibility to make other people feel comfortable. To realize Indigo's nuances are not a bad thing; they are part of who he is. Took me a long time to accept our time-consuming schedules, limitations, and needed accommodations.
NLD is an everyday part of our lives. Everything we do must include NLD as a factor.
Still, every now and then, I become overwhelmed. On these days, NLD is not just a part of our lives; it is all consuming. Times like this tell me I must step back from it all, take a break, live life and forget my NLD responsibilities.
I have learned to put my energy where it matters. People who don't understand have been eliminated from our lives. I do not accept intolerance. I do what I can to educate others and assist parents who struggle with their children's education. Yet, I make sure my son's needs and my needs take priority.
© Sera Rivers