Multiplying Our Influence, Expanding Our Reach: Update on New Singles Site

This is a continuation of our discussion of a possible website for single people with attitude. I’ve summarized suggestions readers have offered for what such a site should include. Next step: Prioritizing.

Why Are Wedding Stories Privileged, Even During Disasters?

Why do reporters look for stories of postponed weddings to illustrate the emotional costs of natural disasters?

Getting Called “Mrs.” How Do You Feel and How Should You Respond?

An assumption that some people make about women is evident in the first word that comes out of their mouths. The word in question is “Mrs.” How do you respond when someone who does not know you addresses you as “Mrs.”? It is a question that is relevant to women of all marital statuses.

Reports of New Census Data on Marriage: Can You Predict the Opening Lines?

In an article on the serious topic of how marriage rates are at an all-time low, and how the ages at which people first marry are continuing to rise, the reporter begins with a cutesy note to single people telling them where to find the wedding bells.

Only Sex Partners Are Allowed: Why Is This the Criterion for Bringing a Guest?

Is it OK to tell a single guest that she can bring a boyfriend you’ve never met but not her mother whom you’ve known for years? Or should singles not be allowed to bring anyone, since that would cost money?

Who Is Your Family If You Are Single with No Kids? Part 2

There is an implied question behind the question: “Single, no children: Who is your family?” That lurking query is, do you even have a family? The answer is yes.

Watch Out, Singles! Once Again, You Are Doomed to an Early Grave by Cheater Technique

Researchers love to discuss the supposed joys of self-selecting into marriage. Astonishingly, many of those same social scientists don’t realize that there is also selection out of marriage (divorce, widowhood), and that selection out could potentially be even more important than selection in.

Who Would Say These Things? Who Would PRINT Them?

A mainstream media publication makes one astonishing claim after another

Chores Without Borders: Who Helps People in Other Households?

Singles are more likely than adults of other marital statuses to provide help to friends, neighbors, and coworkers, including transportation, errands, and shopping; housework, yard work, repairs, or other work around the house; and advice, encouragement, or moral or emotional support.

Divvying Up the Tasks and Chores: Is It Linked to a Longer Life?

People who have always been single have always had to figure out how to get everything done. Why shouldn’t that add to their resilience and longevity?

Single with Ailing Parents: Who Cares?

When a parent is seriously ill or in need of sustained care for any reason, who steps in to provide that care? How do the care-providers manage the other commitments in their lives, including the need to make a living?

Is She or Isn’t She? Who is Single at Heart and Why Does It Matter?

In the 21st century, when more than 100 million Americans are single, a fully grown and thoughtful adult can ask, in all seriousness, whether it is “normal” to have positive feelings about living single.

Single-at-Heart Readers, Take a Look at This!

A reader in a serious romantic relationship with “an amazing, wonderful man” writes to a Love Letters columnist. She’s worried because sometimes she thinks she’d rather not be in a romantic relationship at all. Offer your advice here!

Does Matrimania Really Matter? The Case of Women and Their Disinterest in Science

Guess what undermines women’s interest in science, technology, engineering, and math (STEM)? It is something pervasive and sometimes subtle, and it doesn’t seem to affect men one bit.

Singles, Let’s Multiply Our Influence and Expand Our Reach

Let’s get serious about living single. We need a definitive all-in-one singles web presence that is continuously updated. Help me conceptualize and create this new resource.

Singlism as a Political Dog-Whistle?

Someone’s idea of a politically effective message: “Ferlita is an unmarried woman with a suspect commitment to family values.”

Do Your Parents Dream About Your Wedding Day? The Highbrow Media Dreams Small, Too

The first time I ever gave a talk about singles to a big audience, a man came up to me afterwards and told me that he has a happily single sister, but his mother still prays every night that she will find a husband.

Celebrating Senior Singlehood: Guest Post by Tricia Hoffman

Guest blogger Tricia Hoffman had been married for a long time when she decided to try out single life for a while. Here’s why she never turned back.

Why Coupling Is Not On My Bucket List: Guest Post by Elliott Lewis

Elliott Lewis is “not one of those people for whom relationships just happen.” He explains: “I am not half-a-person searching for my other half to become whole. I’m whole already.”

“Marriage Vow:” Born into Slavery? At Least You Had Two Parents [Updated]

The pledge not to raise taxes is not the only one that candidates are being asked to sign. Some Presidential candidates have already vowed to declare the superiority of married people and their children over singles.

Is the eHarmony Guy Really Discouraging Marriage?

A popular piece at the Huffington Post by the eHarmony Founder is titled, “On second thought, don’t get married?” He is a world-class matrimaniac. Does he really mean this?

Looks Can Kill – Your Better Judgment

Skillful lie-detectors should not be fooled by a person’s looks. They should be able to see beyond a person’s characteristic angelic or devilish look to discern when each person really is lying and whey they are really telling the truth.

Presumptuousness: The Scourge of Those Who Dare to Live Life Their Own Way?

Presumptuousness can blight the experiences of single people, of adults with no children, and of anyone who chooses to live life in a way that is not socially expected way.

Reunited Love – and I Don’t Mean the Romantic Kind!

Should we meet again with an old friend and rediscover what we used to love about each other, we can pick up where we left off, with little angst.

Is This the Myth About Singles That Single People Are Most Likely to Believe?

I’ve always thought that the most intractable myth about single people is that what they want, more than anything else, is to become unsingle. Now I have a new hypothesis.

Can You Name the Singles-Bashing Game that has Endured Since the 17th Century?

Naming the long-lasting singles-bashing game is easy. Understanding how and why it changed over time is more challenging.

Sabbaticals for Singles?

An employment lawyer makes the case that if parents are offered maternity/paternity leave, then singles with no children should be able to take a leave to pursue goals meaningful to them.

If You Watch ‘Lie to Me,’ Will You Become More Successful at Detecting Lies?

The TV show ‘Lie to Me’ was inspired by an actual scientist and supposedly by actual scientific findings. So do viewers do better at spotting lies?

The Pain of Singlism: Is It Personal?

A journalist who is writing about the new Singlism book asked me a question that should have had an obvious answer: What’s the worst kind of singlism?

Embracing Single Life: Guest Post by Elliott Lewis

A lifelong single man spends nine months in therapy and discovers that it is perfectly fine to be single. Here is his story.