Captain of Her Soul: How to Deal With Being Sick and Single

What happens when you are single and seriously ill? How can you deal with the endless challenges when you feel so badly so much of the time? Nika Beamon, author of the riveting new memoir, Misdiagnosed, shares some advice on how to navigate single life when you are ill, and still remain the captain of your soul.

No Kids, No Life? Or, Really Great Life?

Even if the research shows that people are generally happier–or less happy–with kids, that does not mean that YOU will be. We have more choices now about how to live, and that's a good thing.

Quiet: Do We Need It Now More Than Ever?

In the booming, buzzing confusion of our ringing, beeping, and nudging gadgets, do we need quiet more than ever? Or have we become so accustomed to human-made noises that we can't get by without them? Also featuring: links to collections of writings on solitude and living solo.

Why Are So Many Smart Women So Clueless About Single Life?

High-profile women such as Arianna Huffington and Mika Brzezinski want us to "thrive" by defining our success by metrics other than money and power. But in their discussions of women, the only other metrics they come up with are marriage and parenting. Do they really mean to relegate the millions of single women with no kids to the dustbin of humanity?

Most Can’t Stand to Be Alone With Their Thoughts–Can You?

Should it really be so hard to be alone with your own thoughts, with no electronic devices or any other distractions, for just ten minutes? In a recent series of nearly a dozen studies, most people found the experience difficult and unpleasant. Some preferred to experience an electric shock instead. Do you think the results apply to you?
The Unwritten Rules of Sharing Your News

The Unwritten Rules of Sharing Your News

There is an emotional logic to our understanding of who should be the first (and second and third) to know about psychologically significant matters. When these disclosure rules are broken, and a person who should have known first is one of the last to find out, relationships are ruined. When rules are broken in the other direction, intimacy is deepened.

The Happy Loner

Why do we see sociable people as having special skills, while feeling wary of people who are good at spending time alone? Why isn’t the ability to savor solitude a special talent, too?

The End of Marriage

The number of people who are not married has been increasing for decades. But even if those increases slow or reverse, marriage is dead. We have seen the future and all of its possibilities, and marriage can never drag us back.

Get Married or Get Pummeled: Actual Claim in Washington Post

The Washington Post actually published this headline: “One way to avoid violence against women? Stop taking lovers and get married.” It did not stand.

Single in the UK, Post Bridget Jones

Bridget Jones was funny, but not exactly inspirational. Now in this guest post, UK blogger and author Paula Coston shares a much more enlightened perspective on single life from the UK.

Will Mate-trimony Make It Fashionable to Be Single?

Mate-trimony, frennymoons, frenniversaries, life insurance for friends – can these kinds of ideas add up to a better place in society for singles and their friends?

Santa Barbara Slaughter

In the wake of the horrible Isla Vista mass murder, we have heard all about mental health, gun violence, misogyny, our media culture, and more. One topic, though, seems to have been completely overlooked.

Ditch the Fairytale – and Monogamy?

The author of “Screw the Fairytale” has a thing or two to say about our obsession with romantic partners. For example: Why just one at a time? Why assume everyone wants one? What’s with the assumption that if you have a serious relationship partner, you are going to live with that person?

What If Monica Lewinsky Had Been Married?

In systematic research in which two people are described in identical ways, except that one is said to be married and the other, single, the single person is consistently judged more harshly. What can that tell us about the thought-experiment of how Monica Lewinsky would have been viewed differently if she had been married?

Married People Are Mad! How Dare I Say Singles Are Better?

For decades, reporters, pundits, and even social scientists have been claiming that married people are better. They sometimes do so without qualification and without apology. Now look what happens when someone turns the tables.

23 Ways Single People Are Better: The Scientific Evidence

The scientifically-documented superiority of single people can be found in all sorts of domains, such as health, social connections, values, generosity, resilience, and personal resources.

Unconscious, Gut-Level Lie Detection?

If you ask people directly whether someone is lying or telling the truth, they seem like lousy lie detectors. But what if you could find a more indirect way of finding out what they know? Then, would you find that people really do have some unconscious or implicit or gut-level knowledge of when other people are being dishonest?

The Deep Rewards of a Deeply Single Life

There are profound satisfactions of the deeply-single life, as one writer discovered in her early 30s, after about a decade of always having a boyfriend.

Do Fewer Babies Create Happier Humans and Better Societies?

As more women are having fewer children, a panic has developed about what this might mean for societies. Here are five ways in which the tendency toward having fewer children might actually be good for individuals and nations.

Relationship Virgins

If you are in your 20s or 30s or even older than that, and you have never had a romantic relationship, maybe you are not as alone as you think.

Get Married, Get Heart Disease: Study of 3.5 Million Adults

A fundamentally flawed study got lots of attention. It actually did NOT show that if you get married, you will have a healthier heart. The results for coronary heart disease actually suggested, though did not prove, just the opposite.

How Body Language Lets Us Down

Body language can be so seductive. It can also be terribly misleading. It can be lead us astray in the bedroom, in politics, in the marketplace, and in everyday life. It can also be nearly useless in airport screenings.

What Married and Single People Do Differently

Can you predict how married and single people differ (and do not differ) in how they spend their time? The Bureau of Labor Statistics has been keeping track for more than a decade.

What Are Friends For? Views from Single and Married Life

People who talk about friends and friendship in the context of marriage (including scholars) sometimes have a very different take on the topic than do single people and scholars of single life.
Singles Humor: Funny or Not?

Singles Humor: Funny or Not?

Humor is tricky. What’s funny or telling to some is something else entirely to others. What do you think of these examples?

What You Know About Marriage That the NY Times Does Not

If you include in your study only the people who are likely to give you the results you want, that’s not science. Almost all studies of the implications of marital status for health and happiness do just that.

About Those 27 Wrong Reasons You Are Single

I thought I was done with “why are you single” writings, but Sara Eckel’s demolishing of all those patronizing, contradictory, and inaccurate nuggets of advice was satisfying even to someone like me who has no interest in becoming unsingle.

An App That Feels Sorry for You

Time magazine’s sorry app hits a new low with its regressive attitudes and the values it thinks we should live by.

10 Steps for Getting Over Humiliation

Is it possible that what separates the successful from the unsuccessful is not getting humiliated – that happens to everyone – but how they cope with humiliation? Here are 10 tips from one of the most celebrated psychologists, who admits to three big-time humiliations.

Study: Got Married Sooner Than You Hoped? That’s Depressing

In a decades-long study, those who married younger than they had hoped were more depressed than those who married around their ideal age. Those who married a lot later than they had hoped were also more depressed. Those who married younger than they had wished and those who married a lot older were no less depressed at age 40 than those who wanted to marry but never did.