The Case for Friendship [Update]

The scope of Carlin Flora’s new book ranges from the friendships of children and adolescents to the friendships we maintain online. Here’s my take on the themes most relevant to single life.

Top 10 Odes to Single People

From a wide-ranging media landscape, from scholars and pundits and a Supreme Court justice, there is a newly-popular theme in the discussion of single life. It is a respectful and even celebratory theme, which acknowledges the strengths, joys, meaningfulness, and advantages of single life.

Do Married Men Really Get Promoted Fastest?

An article in the Atlantic magazine claims that married men get promoted faster than married women, single women, and single men. Sounds right to me, but does the study pass scientific muster?

Manti Te’o and the Revenge of the Romantic Fantasy

All of the people who got sucked into the Manti Te’o fake-girlfriend story – as perpetrators or dupes – had one thing in common: They were matrimaniacs. Will they be more skeptical in the future?

This Is What It Costs to Be Single

Today, the Atlantic Magazine published the definitive documentation of the high price of single life. Lisa Arnold and Christina Campbell calculated the singles penalty in income taxes, Social Security, housing, health spending, and more. It is a tour de force by our friends from Onely. Don’t let anyone whine about a so-called marriage penalty ever again.

Are Married People the True Victims of Singlism?

If we compare the stereotyping and stigmatizing and discrimination against single people to an analogous bias against married people, there is really no comparison. Discrimination against single people is written into more than 1,000 federal laws. Plus, I set the record straight on the true definition of singlism.

Is Polyamory Bad for the Children?

What does it mean for the kids if their parents are polyamorous – meaning that they engage in “multiple loving relationships or partnerships (as opposed to purely sexual relationships)”?

Satisfied? Jealous? On Deciding Not to Be Monogamous

People strongly believe that monogamous relationships come with greater satisfaction and far less jealousy than non-monogamous relationships. What does the research say?

Buzziest Living Single Posts of 2012

Single-at-heart, solo living, single-again, single parenting, not having kids, hooking up, Rush’s attack on single women, eschewing monogamy, and more, were all buzzy topics this year at Living Single.

Now We Know Whether Facebook Is Making Us Lonely

In an experiment, half of the participants were instructed to post more Facebook status updates than they usually do. Do you think that made them more or less lonely than the people who posted their usual number of updates? What if no one responded to their updates?

Are Monogamous Relationships Really Better?

There are widespread beliefs that monogamous relationships are superior in many ways to consensually non-monogamous relationships. Social scientists are beginning to test those assumptions, and they sometimes end up unimpressed.

The New Science of Friendship

Recent studies address questions such as, what is friendship good for, and what’s with the people who keep adding more and more friends?

Why Friendship is the Key Relationship of the 21st Century

Across the ages, friendship lost its place of nobility. Now, however, a confluence of factors has created the grounds for a renewed significance of the relationship that once was so esteemed.

Of Holiday Bullies and Double Standards

People can be very judgmental about how they think other people should spend the holidays. Even those advice columns that are supposedly even-handed often have different standards for people who are single vs. coupled.

David Brooks, Nuclear Family Scold, Cries Uncle

NY Times columnist David Brooks argues that people are better off when they “bind themselves” to two-parent families. He thinks that laws should discriminate in favor of “family formation and fertility.” I’ll take him on with data.

Are Couples Mean to Singles?

Usually, I decide for myself what to write about here, but every so often, a story shows up in my inbox so many times that I feel that I have no choice but to share it. An essay in the BBC News Magazine is a recent example.

The Single Best Bit of $$ Advice for Single People

A recent report shows that single people are not as far along in their retirement planning as married people are. Here are some big-picture answers to why that is and what can be done, and not just with regard to money.

8 Cool Facts about Halloween

Here’s what psychology can tell us about drinking on Halloween, sex differences in costumes, and other fun facts about trick-or-treating.

Guided Fantasies for the Future

When you think about retirement, you can fantasize about where to live and how to spend 168 hours a week. But you can muse about all of that, and more, even if you are not there yet.

Bite Me? That’s What TV and Movie Romances Do

Does it matter that movies and TV shows are awash in matrimania? Is there any link between watching these shows – or believing in the messages they convey about romantic relationships – and how people in romantic relationships feel about their real relationships?

Did You Miss the Debate Shout-Out to Living Alone?

Did you think the issue of choice was missing from last night’s debate? Actually, we heard about a different kind of choice, one that has probably been missing from all Presidential debates throughout history.

Redesigning Marriage: Experts Miss the Best Idea

A New York Times reporter interviewed experts on marriage, asking them for their suggestions for making it stronger. I’ll tell you about some of them here. First, though, guess what suggestion none of the experts offered.

5 Absolute Truths About Lies

Decades of research on deceiving and detecting deceit suggest five seemingly dismal everlasting truths. The sixth everlasting truth, though, is that the first five are not really all that bad.

Top 10 Living Single Posts Since 2011 Singles Week

Readers’ 10 favorite Living Single posts during the past year are not about just one theme – in fact, they are about 10 different themes.

Who Is the True Avatar of the Lonely Crowd – the Single Person or the Couple?

It is National Singles Week, and English Professor Michael Cobb gives us something to celebrate with his provocative new book offering arguments for the uncoupled.

Yes, We Really Do Want Lifelong Singlehood

A recent post asking whether you really do want lifelong singlehood, or whether you are just fooling yourself, is a throw-back to the 1950s. The authors repeat the usual bogus claims about marriage, and seem oblivious to contemporary critical thinking about marriage and single life.

If You Live Alone, Have You Made a Virtue of Selfishness?

A critic argues that people who live alone are abdicating their responsibility to develop the good character of the next generation.

Sex and the Single Voter: 2012 Edition

In 2004, I wrote an op-ed in the New York Times about the caricaturing and dismissive ways that single people were being treated in the Presidential campaign. Now, it is not just single people who are under assault.

Does Capitalism Love Single People?

Are marketers so smitten with single people that they are actually portraying them positively in ads and encouraging people to divorce?

Four Single Men: All Hetero, Approaching 40, Living Together for 18 Years

A story of four single men who have been living together for nearly two decades is also a story about the living arrangements of our 21st century lives, and how we find our place, our space, and our people.

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