7 Kinds of Marriages – and One Awesome Alternative

Actually, success in marriage isn't all about communication and intimacy and negotiating conflict. You and your partner need to decide what you want to get out of your marriage. Here are 7 very different kinds of marriage goals. Alternatively, embrace your single life!

10 Ways the Children of Single Parents Defy All Stereotypes

Here are 10 stereotype-defying scientifically-based facts about the children of single parents. Sometimes they do even better than the children of married parents. How is that possible?

Let's Start a Community of Single People

Many single people (and singles activists) want to be in touch with other single people who like their single lives. Reporters are often looking for singles to interview. Professionals working with singles want enlightened resources. Let's create a community of single people that's not about dating.

Completely Alone

A huge proportion of Americans want to have at least some time when they are completely alone, away from everyone else. But what about the small minority? Are there really people who want no time at all to be completely on their own?

Gay Marriage Ruling Is Matrimaniacal, Shames Single People

It is possible to expand the scope of social justice without declaring one class of people superior and derogating another. The SCOTUS ruling on same-sex marriage failed in that respect. We are all supposed to be equal under the law.

9 Scientific Strategies for Healthy Weight Without Dieting

The best way to achieve your "leanest livable weight" is to forsake dieting, give up on summoning that elusive willpower, and use the findings from social science to change your environments and your ways of thinking about food. The strategies are based on research, not some bogus fad.

America Is a Singles Nation, Or Is It?

The latest in a series of cover stories about the rise of single people declares that the U.S. is a "singles nation." I love that idea. But is it really true? Here are some criteria for what a true singles nation would look like.

11 Reasons Never to Shame Anyone

When people behave badly (or when we think they do), we are often tempted to shame them. From psychological research, though, we have learned that what happens to people who are shamed can be quite dire.

Saying No: the Most Affirming and Authentic Thing You Can Do

The "Affirmative No" is "the refusal to pursue a course of action that, on serious reflection, you discover is not right for you." It can be the most important, affirming, and authentic act of your life.

How to Talk to a Single Person

Some people seem to have a hard time conversing with single people. All they can think of to ask is whether the single person is seeing someone. Even worse, researchers can be just as flummoxed. A survey claiming to be "the most comprehensive" about single life asked only about 1 question of 128 that was not about becoming unsingle. Here's how to talk to a single person.

Single Mothers and Their Health, Around the World

A much-publicized study claimed that single mothers are at risk for poor health. Here's a less credulous analysis, starting with the fact that in many countries, there is no difference whatsoever between the health of the single and married mothers, and continuing with the actual factors that make a difference.

Singles in Finland – No Shrinking Violets!

Finland is a small country with a very big place for single people. An astonishing 42 percent of all households in Finland are comprised of single people living alone (and not all single people live alone). Here's what they say they need and deserve.

We Have It All Wrong About Lonely People

A set of just-published studies shows that lonely people have social skills that are just as good, or even better, than those of non-lonely people. But certain social situations make lonely people anxious, and that anxiety undermines the skills that are there for them when they are not worried.

Who Is Divorce Toughest On?

There are big differences among people in how well they do after getting divorced. A recent review article suggested 5 ways that resilient people differ from those who have the hardest time.

Sex Drive? There's No Such Thing

The notion of a sex drive is probably one of the most widely accepted ideas in popular culture and beyond. But there are scientific standards for what counts as a drive, and in her new book, "Come as You Are," Emily Nagoski argues that sex doesn't meet them.

Spinster is the New Black

Single people are having a moment. Articles are popping up everywhere about ways of living fully and joyfully outside of marriage and nuclear families. Suddenly, spinster is the new black. The question is, who gets to wear it?

When Your Personal, Private Choices Enrage Others

Why do perfect strangers react to some of our most personal choices with anger and attempts to stigmatize us for them? "Otherhood" author Melanie Notkin, historian Elaine Tyler May, environmentalist Bill McKibben, "Childless by Choice" project director Laura S. Scott, and I share our thoughts about the matter.

The Best of Times or the Worst of Times for Marriage?

Fewer people are marrying than ever before, as claims about the power of marriage—for adults, for children, and for society—intensify. How accurate are those claims? What are the implications of offering more incentives to people to get married and more benefits and protections once they do?

What We All Get So Wrong About Narcissists

To determine whether narcissists really do use more "I-talk" (I, me, my, mine) than everyone else, 9 psychologists from 7 universities analyzed data from more than 4,000 people in 15 samples. They looked at face-to-face introductions and personal essays and Facebook pages and classrooms and small groups. They explain why they did not find what you thought they would.

A Happy Life or a Meaningful One? They Are Not the Same

Although experiencing happiness and meaningfulness in your life often go together, they are not exactly the same. Research shows what kinds of experiences are markers of a life that is happy but not meaningful, and the (sometimes surprising) experiences that comprise a life that is meaningful, but not happy.

10 Awkward Moments, and 6 Ways to Escape Them

We all have socially awkward experiences, but what makes a social interaction so uncomfortable? Research has pointed to 10 kinds of experiences that are especially likely to make people feel awkward, and 6 things people can do to escape from the awkwardness (without just walking away) and feel comfortable again.

Is a Solitary Life a Shorter Life? Results of Big New Review

A new review of a huge amount of data suggests that loneliness, social isolation, and living alone are all linked to shorter lives. Does that mean that living alone is bad for your health even if you love going solo? That's what the New York Times claimed. Here's why they are wrong.

The Arse-Backwards Way of Helping Kids

For the first time, more babies are being born to cohabiting mothers than to single mothers. Both of those family types, though, are worse off economically than married-parent families. How should we think about that and what should we do?

23 Quips for Marriage Skeptics and Lovers of Single Life

Some great insights about solitude, single life, and marriage, offered with brevity and sometimes a touch of humor

Finding "The One" Is Overrated: Emotionships Matter More

New research shows the power of having different people in your life who are good at helping you with different kinds of emotions. People with a diverse portfolio of "emotionships" are more satisfied with their lives. People who put all their emotional eggs into one relationship basket get celebrated by all the sappy love songs but they are not necessarily better off.

Can You Trust Married People to Keep a Secret?

If you have friends who are married, should you assume that those friends share all of your communications and conversations – both the routine ones and those told in confidence – with their spouse? What does it mean if couples see themselves only as a unit and not also as individuals?

Check Your Marital Privilege

There is a vast swath of unearned privileges that have gone largely unrecognized, even though they unfairly advantage about half of the adult population in the U.S.—marital privileges. People who marry enjoy social, cultural, economic, and political advantages that single people do not, simply because they are married.

Are You a Perfectionist?

A 30-item quiz promises to reveal your perfectionist tendencies and, along the way, let you know what perfectionism really is. But how do you know whether this quiz, or any other, really does measure what it claims to measure?

Best Media Debunking of the Myth of Marital Bliss

For way too long, reporters who should know better have been perpetuating myths about the benefits of marrying based on working papers and press releases. Finally, someone challenged those claims instead of just repeating them.

How Not to Think About Single People

When "experts" offer their opinions on single people, they sometimes reveal what they do not know about single people and single life. A recent New York Times story includes a number of claims just begging to be critiqued. Readers, have at it!

Pages