In Flux

Embracing transitions and change
Abigail Brenner, M.D.

The Shape of Your life

More than the straight line, moving from point A to point B, or the circle representing a completion, our lives more specifically follow the course of the spiral. This movement allows us to move up and down, from left to right, & is never fixed or permanent. As with the shape of the spiral, we have a chance to see our progress through each successive winding.

The First Time

From the moment we are born we will all go through a series of first time events. How we experience them will depend upon many things, but especially how we are raised and how we think and feel about ourselves. Here are 7 points to consider to enhance your first time experiences.

Expanding Consciousness

Meditation is a tool to help us leave the conscious life behind and go in search of those things deep within our consciousness. Imagery helps us break down the linear, logical barriers created by our thoughts so that we may go beyond our limitations to places unknown and untapped.

The Importance of Being Alone

Being alone is often thought of as a negative state of being---that there is something wrong or defective when you are by yourself. Nothing could be further from the truth which is that you need to be alone to truly come to know yourself and what is best for you.

Are You a Replacement Child?

The replacement child is a phenomenon known through early clinical papers but not well recognized in the mainstream. Many people know they are replacement children from early on while others only come to recognize themselves as such as life unfolds. Understanding the unique phenomenon of the RC may lead to better resolution for the individual.

How to Stop Taking Things Personally

Relationships are complicated. Ideally, we strive for healthy, fulfilling interactions with others where there is mutual respect and genuine caring. Some relationships however, challenge us and make us question ourselves. Learning how to identify difficult interactions will help us to navigate through them and to find what we need to live our own authentic life.
10 Relationship Red Flags

10 Relationship Red Flags

Most of us will be involved in at least a few intimate relationships during our lifetime. Often, we have little to no expereince about what to expect and what to hope for. Often, it is our needs that dictates what we want to get out of a relationship. Often, we're willing to settle for or accept what is not in our best interest. These 10 points may help you.

6 Ways to Take Control

There are times in our life when we don't know what to do or where to go. We may believe that someone else knows best for us what we need to do. But beware the seduction of the siren's call---when people try to take charge of your life for their own ends, to fit their own agenda. Here are some things to be aware of that may help you get your life back.

5 Ways to Create Family Traditions

Family traditions keep us connected to those closest to us. Family traditions strengthen family bonds, teach values, connect us throughout a lifetime, and help mold our individual as well as our family identity.

Becoming a Mother

Mother is a role assigned to women the moment they give birth. And in fact, they do become someone's mother. But the real "mothering" develops over time as a woman learns who her child is and how to best nurture and teach that child.

Creating a Road Map for Your Life

While we understand change and transition and have gone through many of these during the course of our lives, why do we often feel that we don't have control over what happens to us? What are we not seeing about our past experiences that could help us in understanding and navigating change and transition moving forward?

Where Are You, Walter Cronkite?

Whatever happened to reporting the news as opposed to creating or manipulating the news? Is the media creating our reality? What about practicing decency and respect when it comes to bringing someone's story and/or personal tragedy to the public?

I Wish I Had Asked

Don't wait to learn everything you want to know about your family history and your ancestors. Gather the stories, customs, and traditions of your family while your elders are alive.

The Belief Inventory

The Belief Inventory will help you clarify what you believe and help you to change what you believe if what you believe no longer suits you. Too often we hang on to outdated beliefs that are no longer suitable for where we are in our lives. You can always alter the course your life takes by changing your beliefs and their accompanying feelings and behaviors.

When Someone You Love Changes and Forgets to Tell You

Sometimes the people we love become strangers to us. We may wonder how things got so bad without our knowing about it. But the truth is that many of us don't understand that relationships change over time just as the individuals within that relationship do. Learning how to make time and listen to each helps keep the relationship in the present.

Downshifting to Upshift Your Life

We live in a fast paced world which is both empowering and overwhelming. How do we keep up with all that's going on around us and how do we effectively process these rapid changes? How do we find a way to stay in control of our own life and make the necessary changes and transitions that serve us best personally?

Whose Neurosis is This, Anyway?

There is no doubt that chidren often "inherit" their parent's unfinished business. This is frequently the case when parents suffer trauma in their past and the consequences of those events play themselves out both individually and societally in future generations.

The Space Between Us

Before you can be intimate with another, you must become intimate with yourself.

Will the Real Me Please Stand Up

There are times when each of us will feel incompetent and inadequate, will doubt ourself, will feel like an outsider. That's normal, since there are times when we really don't know what we're doing. But when we consistently feel this way, even when we have the experience and achievements behind us, we may be suffering from the Impostor Syndrome.

How to Change Your Behavior for Good

By the time we reach adulthood we are programmed biocomputers. However, we have the capacity to "self-program" the biocomputer and so create new programs and revise old ones.

Healing: A Spiritual Being in a Physical Body

What is the difference between cure and healing? Cure has come to mean the elimination of illness. But beyond this, healing implies balance—becoming whole and sound. A healing crisis may become a catalyst for changing the way you live your life.

How to Stay Grounded When Your Life is Falling Apart

Life is full of ups and downs. Knowing what to expect along the way, at least some of the time, might make you feel a whole lot better about the journey called life.

7 "Rituals" for Spring Renewal

Spring is a perfect time to stop, reassess your life, and make changes that are more appropriate and satisfactory for where you are right now. All it takes are a few small changes to set you on a new course---physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Reflections of a Replacement Child

An interview with replacement child Judy Mandel. Here she answers questions about confronting the issues, asking the questions, and getting the answers relevant to many replacement children.

The Inner Language of the Subconscious

Learning to access the subconscious and to fully utilize its gifts can help us to "see" in a new way. Beyond our conscious mind and usual senses the veil is lifted, revealing a world of unlimited possibilities.

The Forgotten Mourners

When a child dies, the family dynamics are changed forever; individual family members are changed forever. Children's grief at the death of a sibling must be acknowledged as much as the grief of the adults around them. This article addresses the signs and symptoms of a child's grief and offers some strategies to work through the grief.

You Are What You Believe

Early childhood programming determines what we believe. What we believe as fact or truth is fundamentally programmed. Understanding who we are at our core, without the layers of societal and cultural truths, can enable us to live life more in touch with what is most important to us personally and to live beyond limiting beliefs.

Stiletto Heels and the Economy

Women's heel heights have soared in the last several years. An IBM study correlates several economic crises in the last century with an increase in the height of women's heels.

How to Accomplish Just About Anything

Why are some people able to succeed at making change and achieving their goals while others fail over and over again? There is a process for making change that requires that you make a firm decision to change first and then create the step by step action plan necessary to carry you through.

The Replacement Child

A child is often born after a sibling dies and, in most cases, that child is welcomed, loved, and respected for the individual he/she is. This is clearly not the case with the "replacement child" who is conceived to literally replace a deceased child.

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