Power in Sex Isn't a Problem, in Fantasy or With Consent

Disturbing as the recent accusations of sexual harassment and misconduct are, the sexual fantasies that fueled them are common. The problem isn't the fantasies; its the enactment.

Treating Nazis: Analytic Considerations on Hate

Hate is a normal part of the human condition. What separates us from those in hate groups is we had a childhood that helped us learn how to manage our feelings.

An Impactful Change You Can Successfully Make

You have a voice inside your head narrating your life and actions. Is it kind and supportive? Unless you have made a conscious effort, it is likely mean and hateful.

It's Not the Glass That's Half Full/Empty; It's the Breast

We judge others as dispositioned towards negativity or positivity, scarcity or abundance, as a chosen disposition. In truth, that disposition gets set in infancy.

Psychotherapist as a Dance Archeologist

An explanation through metaphor of why we repeat patterns from our families of origin and how therapy helps us change that.

Attending to the Unconscious in a Psychotherapy Session

Lots of folks can offer counsel to our clients. Our job is to help them access clues from their unconscious about the turmoils of their soul.

Thinking About Divorce or Suicide? Stop it! For 6 Months

Neither divorce nor suicidality is the easy way out, but first we must consider every vehicle, every effort, every courageous act to save what is most precious.

Eye Rolls, Shrugs, and Why Trump Is So Provocative

Some folks have a knack for riling us up. It isn't magic.

Colin Kaepernick, Beyoncé, Chappelle and Black Lives Matter

Few folks want to be accused of being racist. And hating certain protests and protesters isn't proof of racism. Failing to see the need for racial discrimination protest is proof.

What "Make America Great Again" Means

In this political climate, and with this upcoming election, judging/mocking/shaming/hating/spewing isn’t going to get us an America that embraces and supports all its citizenry.

Three Key Father Parenting Jobs, Analytically Speaking

Psychoanalytic theory has a lot to say about the role of mothers in early infant psychological development. Less familiar is the roles fathers play in their childrens' developement

Let's Profile Brock Turner, More Accurately Than His Father

Let’s analyze this criminal’s psychological profile, the way they do in all our favorite crime dramas on TV, imagining ourselves in the shoes of the rapist.

A Snarky Size Activist and 3 Benefits of My Stupid Fitbit

I would hate my stupid step tracker even more if it wasn't working to help me increase my movement.

6 Openings for Talking to Kids About Sex and Gender

We want to be one of the people our kids talk to about sex, sexuality, orientation and gender. Even if it terrifies us.

Psychoanalytic Mother Lovers: 3 Theories for Mom's Day

Psychoanalytic interest is predicated on a belief that psychic, emotional, mental development evolves in the petri dish that is the mother/infant relationship.

5 Reasons to Treat Dating Like an Internship

Take full advantage of the exploratory, temporary nature of dating.

Attending to the Unconscious in a Psychotherapy Session

Lots of folks can offer counsel to our clients. Our job is to help them access clues from their unconscious about the turmoils of their soul.

“Why Would I Do Something So Stupid?!” 3 Tools for Answers

Find yourself stuck in repetitive behaviors, making the same poor relational choices? You have a good reason, you just have to be curious enough to figure it out.

Made Your New Year's Resolution? Read This

If you have been making the same resolutions year after year, read this.

Want to Raise a Diversity-Savvy Kid? 3 Traps, 2 Solutions

Contrary to popular belief, kids are born with questions about difference. Over-emphasizing sameness only makes them think we are racist.

Sometimes I Give in to my Kid, and I Am OK With That

While we mostly agree as parents that consistency is a key to successful compliance from our kids, letting them sway us to break our rules and/or change our minds has its benefits as well.

5 Reasons Suffering People Don’t Want to Try Medication

While it is true that we live in a world that too quickly turns to medication, it doesn't mean people with anxiety and depressive disorders should go without. This may be our one and only life; it is worth removing barriers to our contentment.

Angry Young Feminists

Here is my current contribution the perennial debate about why some folks hate feminists and the concept of feminism. I am going to “blame” it on angry young feminists. Okay, I don’t really mean I am going to blame it on them, but I am going to speculate on how the period of waking up to sexism effects young women and the people around them.

Love is Lovely, but Hate Gives Love its Teeth

Hate is a normal part of mature, relevant love. A love that holds the reality of hate is stronger and can withstand the trials of time in a way that new, idealized love could never hold a candle to.

8 Things You Have to Remember When You Fight With a Partner

Fighting with our partner can bring out the absolute worst in us and them. We can change that. And as a reward, we will gain access to some of the core issues that are preventing us from living our life to the fullest.

Catch the New (School) Year Wave and Get Back to Work

Fall brings with it a renewed commitment to "getting back to work." Let psychotherapy be part of the work you get back to. Its goals are fundamental shifts in how we see/experience/think about ourselves, our relationships and existence itself.

Turning 50: Alison Bechdel’s Success and Mine

Relative career success can lull us into complacency. As we live and work longer we benefit from seeing opportunities for new professional ventures. Age allows us to take on these new ventures with experience, skill and confidence.