The Most Self-Affirming Gift You Can Give Yourself

The tyranny of our task list (including the relentless call to self-improvement) all too frequently distracts us from the two most important questions for a well-lived life:

The Greatest Lesson of Love—Taught By Donald Trump

This is the most urgent lesson of love: Stay away from toxic relationships. When we ignore that lesson, we marry misery. Which is precisely what is happening in our country.

The Essential Happiness Skill No One Teaches Us

Few of us are taught one of the greatest happiness skills of all: learning to bear our joy. This lovely two-minute practice will teach you exactly how.

Considering Reconciliation? Answer These Questions First

Real love is an ongoing saga of "rupture and repair.” Trying to reconcile is brave. It's hopeful. But if you want it to actually work, be sure to answer the following questions.
Bigstock Stock Photo ID: 188063461 Copyright: rdonar

How to Discover Your Intimacy Shadow

To unshackle your capacity for deep intimacy, learn to reclaim the important parts of yourself you suppress. This simple question will help you discover your own "Intimacy-Shadow."

3 Tips for Finding Someone Who's Perfect for You

Most dating advice promises lasting love, but erodes our chance of ever finding it. The secret to success isn't about your attractiveness. It's about your attractions.

How to Identify and Avoid Toxic People, via Trump's Tweets

First step to a happy life: Know how to recognize toxic people and situations and do your best to stay away. Here are four warning signs.

Developing Deep Attention: The Key to True Intimacy

An interview with ADHD expert Edward Hallowell, M.D., who teaches five simple steps to cultivate deep attention, the key to a life filled with intimacy.

This Is the Surprising Key to Having a Better Sex Life

There is a research-based key to better sex and relationships. But it flies in the face of almost everything we've been taught.

Trump, Love, and the Presidency

As a psychotherapist specializing in the search for intimacy, I note the striking parallels between the ways we choose a life-mate and the way we choose our president.

The 2 Things You Need to Find in Any Partner

The way we approach dating determines the kind of love we are likely to find.

Why Popular Dating Advice Is Keeping You Single

Popular dating advice consistently leads single people away from the very love they are seeking. Research explains why this is and what to do about it.

The Six Steps to Sacred Citizenship

According to Stephen Dinan, author of the Sacred America, there are six steps each of us can take that create world-change and personal joy. Here are those six steps:

The 2 Questions You Have to Ask About Your Relationship

This simple exercise will lead you to greater intimacy, joy and healing in your most important relationships.

Losing Love—and Finding It Again

My extraordinary father recently passed away at 90. How he freed himself from hate’s grip, healed his relationship with me, and reclaimed his love for his wife is a story of hope.

A Research-Backed Recipe for Deep Romance on Valentines Day

These two exercises are a research-backed recipe for a profoundly romantic Valentine’s Day; they will deepen your long-term bond, reduce stress, and even improve your day-after!

An Intimacy Micro-Meditation For Your New Year

Recognizing the value of the intimacy gifts we have already is one of the greatest ways to improve our lives. This short practice will help you discover your own intimacy gifts.

Three Liberating Insights For Single People

Here are the three most liberating insights I know for single people. Follow them, and you’ll change the course of your dating life in surprising and wonderful ways.

A Life-Changing Exercise for Anyone Who Has Lost a Loved One

Perhaps the greatest secret to a love-filled life is to cherish the relationships we already have--including relationships with those who have passed. Here is a simple yet profoundly healing exercise for anyone who has lost a loved one.

Why You're Lucky to be Single and Seeking Love

If you’re single and you’re willing to treat your dating life as a journey of growth, then you’re very lucky. Why? Because the way we search for love usually determines the kind of love we find. By approaching your dating life with deeper awareness, you have the power to change your romantic future in powerful, positive ways.

The Simple Exercise That Will Lead You Toward Love

The path to love is never simple. When we decide to pursue our longing for love, we’re led down a path with challenges we might never have dreamed of. For me, the decision to become a father—as a forty-something, single gay man---is what changed everything. In this post, I’d like to offer a potent exercise for following your own call to love—and share my personal story.

3 Steps to Resolving the Conflicts That Hold You Back

This simple technique is designed to deepen all of your intimate relationships, including your relationship with yourself. Each of its three steps leads to a deeper state of authenticity, a gentle, skillful “overthrow” of the inner and outer voices which hold us back from deeper love.

Sparkle Versus Glow—and What That Means For Your Love Life

I recently had a dialogue with Sophia Dembling, author of Introverts in Love: The Quiet Way to Happily Ever After. Both of us had books come out at about the same time concerning the search for love. Her insights on the distinction between glow and sparkle hold one of the greatest keys to finding and keeping healthy love.

The Quickest, Smartest Way to Bring More Love into Your Life

In deciding your most important goals for 2015, don’t forget the factor that's most likely to give you joy, contentment, and a deep sense of personal meaning and mission. We all know what that is: It's loving relationships. I'm referring to all forms of love, not just romantic love. Here is the simplest and best way to create a more love-filled year ahead.
 Shambhala Publications

Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt: Insight-Gems for Singles

I am so pleased to share my interview with Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt on the conscious search for love. Simply interviewing this extraordinary couple was an inspiring experience. There are many gems of insight here, and I encourage every thoughtful person who is serious about finding love to take the time to read this.

How to Discover Your Core Intimacy Gifts

Young or old, single or coupled, each of us is faced with the great challenge of learning to love. Our core gifts lie at the heart of our intimacy journey, and when we identify them, we hold an invaluable key to understanding ourselves and all our relationships. Answering these two simple questions will enable you to discover your own core intimacy gifts.
 Shambhala Publications

Lady Valor: Kristin Beck, gender-role freedom and love

Lady Valor, airing this Thursday, is an inspiring CNN documentary about transgender activist Kristin Beck. As a decorated Navy Seal, Christopher Beck crossed enemy lines to fight for freedom. As Kristin, she crosses equally scary enemy lines; the gender taboos that hold all of us back from full self-expression and deeper intimacy.

2 Ideas That Will Change The Way You Think About Romance

The majority of dating advice subtly guides us away from authentic intimacy.
 Shambhala Publications

A Simple Question That Will Change Your Search for Love

Most advice on seeking love focuses on the skills of seeking, not the skills of loving. Apps, events and websites offer endless opportunities to meet, but until we learn how to choose healthy intimacy and nurture its tender new shoots, it’s unlikely we’ll find the love we seek. We can transform our search for intimacy by approaching it in a new way.

An Interview with Judith Orloff, MD: The Power of Surrender

Judith Orloff, M.D. is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her most recent book is the national bestseller The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life. In this interview, Judith explains what surrender really means, and how we can use it to find deeper intimacy, joy and meaning in our lives.