These challenges are often rooted in differences in vantage points and communication styles. People with ADHD make sense of the world differently than others. For example, have you ever noticed that your partner hyper-focuses on things that truly grab his attention, and may tend to show up late because he got lost in time? Or that he tends to breaks promises to you, despite the fact that you have expressed your disappointment in this habit?
If patterns like this repeat themselves, you are likely to take it personally and feel disrespected. But these annoying traits typically don’t mean your partner doesn’t love or respect you. Face it: you both simply focus and experience time differently (and by the way, have you ever considered that some of your traits may annoy him too?).
It's easy to understand how symptoms commonly associated with ADHD (hyper-focus, impulsivity, distractability, inattention and hyperactivity) can affect relationships. To complicate matters, most people with ADHD are not diagnosed until they are adults – if at all – and even fewer receive treatment.
Once you commit to developing an understanding of these differences, you and your partner with ADHD are on your way to a much more fulfilling relationship.
In light of some of the discord they experience, frequently the partner without ADHD wonders “why was I attracted to someone with ADHD in the first place, and why am I still in love with them despite the challenges?” Their responses frequently indicate that their partner with ADHD also has many positive and endearing qualities:
For better or worse, here are seven tips that can help you and the one you love to live happily ever after.
All couples view the world differently and communicate uniquely – this fact may just be heightened for couples with ADHD. If your partner has ADHD, I encourage you to use these seven tips to turn potential challenges into creative ways to grow closer to them and get the love you deserve, when you deserve it!