What Can We Do About Domestic Violence?

Sometimes, I suggested she simply leave the country, run away, but she told me her husband had the children’s passports kept in his safe. She couldn’t abandon six children.

How Much Truth Should We Tell?

How much truth should we tell and how should we tell it?

How to Overcome Guilt?

Of course, there are people who should feel guilty. Yet, ironically these are the very ones who often do not feel any remorse like the young man who shot nine black parishioners.

Why Do Women Put Up With Infidelity?

What we can we learn about infidelity from "Jackie."

Why Is Hair so Important to Us?

Is it more than vanity?

How to Create Suspense

How do you keep a reader reading a text?

What Makes People Resort to Physical Violence?

What makes people resort to physical violence?

What Goes Into the Creative Act? Can Therapy Be Creative?

Is there any overlap between therapy and the creative act?

Why Do Women Feel Ashamed After Sexual Assault?

Like so many women, I have experienced sexual assault, and unlike many have written about it, sometimes even naming the responsible party, but so many years later.

What Do We Remember of Our Pasts?

How much do we falsify our own past to suit our present needs and desires?

How Much Can We Borrow from One Another?

Isaac Newton reportedly said back in 1676: "If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants."

How to Face Death With Equanimity

Of all my seven grandchildren, Masha is the only one at whose birth I assisted. It was a privileged moment in my life. Yet I was anxious.

Six Secrets of Success in Love and Work

It is often from suffering that we learn best how to live.

Three Ways to Transform Your Life

For it is often in our pasts that we find the solution to the present situation.

How to Acquire Authority

Kent: "You have in your countenance that which I would fain call master. Lear: "What is that?" Kent: "Authority"

What Lies at the Heart of the Criminal Act ?

What interests me here is the motivation of the killer, why and how such an evil act could be performed. It is Ivan Karamazov’s old question: the reason for the existence of evil in the world.

How to Change Your Life

So often in life one feels a victim, forced by circumstances, personality, or even up-bringing to suffer in silence or "to grin and bear it." Many of us were brought up in the English tradition where one is expected not to explain or complain but to carry on cheerfully regardless.

How Important Are Good Manners?

The French have a saying: "Hypocrisy is the bow that vice makes to virtue."

Where Do Our Fantasies Come From?

But from this reality, Oates takes a few small steps ( did Henry James really faint at his first visit overcome by the sights and sounds around him?) and eventually some imaginative leaps which seem to come only from her own imagination and perhaps her own fantasies. Are they also ours?

What Happens in the Creative Act?

One of the best ways to answer this fascinating question is to read great writers writing about other great writers and thus describing the creative act. In the historical novel, written about a great writer, we have two writers engaged in the creative act: the writer who is the subject of the study and the author him or herself.

How To Write the Historical Novel

It is interesting to look at three excellent examples of the historical novel and see how the authors tackle their task one which Henry James, himself, deemed doomed to failure. He wrote of the historical novel "as tainted by a fatal cheapness.”

Why Has Our Attitude to Homosexuality Changed?

What has changed our attitudes to homosexuality?

Should We Choose Someone Similar or Different as a Mate?

Should we choose someone very different or similar to us as a partner?

Why Do We Choose Unsuitable Partners?

Having lost a father when we were very young ( I was seven and my sister nine) my sister and I may have felt that men were fragile, that they might easily desert us, disappear, leave not a rack behind. Perhaps we feared that without our help, without us to prop them up, bolster their self-esteem, keep them safe, they would crumble into dust.

How to Avoid Thinking of Oneself as a Victim

When my older sister was killed by her husband after a history of battering, I was in a rage. I sat down and wrote a novel in three months. I wrote out of anger and the sense that my sister had been a victim, an innocent, martyred woman, the mother of six small children, whose husband had killed her by driving a car off the road on a dry night with no other car in sight.

How to Cope With the Envy of Others

My mother was one of four children, three girls and a boy. They came from a modest home. She was the only one of the three girls to marry a wealthy man, twenty years older than she. He lived in a splendid house with fourteen acres of garden, a pool, tennis court, and even a nine hole golf course all kept up by an army of servants.

Does Travel Truly Broaden the Mind?

When I was fifteen my mother sent me to stay with a Belgian woman who had been the French teacher at our boarding school in Johannesburg.

How To Hold It All Together in Life and Literature

A great editor once told me, "If you do it once and it works, do it again. If you bring in a character once bring him/ her in again. " This might be applied to both life and literature.

When Is It Wise to Confess?

I remember telling my poor children their father was in Bruxelles when my ex- husband was off with his mistress. My intentions were of the best, of course. I hoped to spare my little girls the suffering of knowing of their father's infidelity, which he finally confessed to them much to my ire. But I'm not sure my silence was ultimately helpful to my children.

What Is the Motivation for a Criminal Act?

St. Augustine, who ponders this question in 387 A.D. writes: So when people look for the reason why some criminal act has been committed their account is only rendered credible when it is evident that there may have been greed on the malefactor’s part.

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