Kids, Your Dad Wants a Divorce

It's time to sit down and break the news to the kids that their parents are going to divorce, a decision that is not mutual. What's the best way to approach this with the kids?

Sex: The Gift That Keeps on Giving

Some people believe that the decision to have sex is strictly a personal one. Being in the mood is a prerequisite. But are there other things to consider in committed relationships?

Two Lists That Can Save Your Marriage

Psychological stamina- The difference between those who make it and those who don't

The Sex-Starved Marriage Secret

Sometimes, there is a simple solution to a sexual desire gap.

No Stone Unturned

Would leaving no stone unturned keep a marriage therapist's marriage intact?

New Year's Resolutions for 2011?- A picture is worth a thousand words

IF you want to make 2011 the best year ever, pay more attention to your relationship than you do your bank account, waistline, or drinking and smoking habits.  Maintaining marital fitness offers benefits that go far beyond other resolutions that fade soon after the ball drops.

10 Marriage New Years Resolutions for 2011: The Divorce Busters Edition

Most marriage New Year's Resolutions are written for couples in which both partners are willing work toward their goals together. Unfortunately, many spouses don't have that luxury.  If you're going about saving your marriage alone, please, read this!

Physician Heal Thyself

Fall always makes me pensive. But this year, the ping felt deep inside has taken on extra meaning. It marks the two-year anniversary of my mother's fatal car accident. 

The Mommy Madness Mistake

"The best way to avoid the mommy madness mistake is to remember that the single best thing you can do for your children is to put your marriage first."

How to Get What You Want (Without Complaining)

There's a difference between asking for what you want, and complaining. Although complaining may occasionally work for you, it's not doing your marriage any favors in the long term. Eventually the other spouse will shut down. The following post walks you through how to ask for what you want in a more productive manner.

Friends Aren't Enough

Ok, I really know nothing about why Courtney Cox and David Arquette are calling it quits, but that doesn't stop me from having an opinion.

How Can You Tell When a Marriage Is Over?

Your marriage is in trouble. You don't know what to do . You want unbiased professional advice, "Can or should this marriage be saved?" But in reality, is there such a thing?

What's Up With Al and Tipper Gore? Inquiring Minds Want to Know

Here we go again. We are endlessly fascinated when high profile marriages crash and burn. It offers us opportunities to speculate, criticize, engulf ourselves in smugness, or in humbler moments, recognize the humanity in all of us. But most of all, just like the outrageously popular show, American Idol, it gives us something to talk about and weigh in on.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell Your Family

Though it's natural to confide in close friends and relatives when your marriage go astray, think twice.  It may come back to haunt you.

The Calm Before the Calm

If you have been following my blog, you know that I usually write about marriage.  Today, I am going to veer from my path and write about something big that happened on my vacation with my husband in Hawaii.  Although the experience certainly brought us closer, I don't recommend it as a regular method for reconnecting.  In a moment, you'll see why.

Valentine's Day for the Broken Hearted

Romantic dinners at candlelit restaurants, Godiva chocolates, two dozen long-stem roses, sentimental Hallmark cards- the stuff Valentine's Day is made of.But what if your relationship is on the rocks and Valentine's Day is just another painful reminder that your life isn't what you hoped it would be?

9 Tips for the Partner With a Higher Sex Drive

Are you the spouse with the higher sex drive? This post will offer you nine tips to approach your spouse in ways that will increase the likelihood that she or he will want to be close to you.

11 Tips for the Spouse With a Lower Sex Drive

This is the first of two posts that addresses the most common sexual problem for couples- a sexual desire gap.  This post offers 11 tips for the low desire spouse.

Ten Unexpected Resolutions for Becoming Richer, Thinner and Healthier in 2010

I've got some eye-opening news that might make the usual New Year's resolutions of becoming healthier, happier, richer (or at least less strapped for cash) more of a reality this year. Follow my advice and you won't only lose weight, quit smoking and feel more energetic, you will actually live longer.

Why Tiger Would

As soon as I heard on the news that Tiger Woods smashed his car after leaving his house at some ungodly hour in the morning, I knew we were in for a tabloid blitz with speculations about the possible reasons for such a hasty exit. Then, once allegations of infidelity started to hit the airwaves, the inevitable happened- all eyes turned to the intriguing Tiger Woods mystery. Inquiring minds want to know, "What did he do?" "Why did he do it," "How often did he do it?" "What does this mean for his marriage and more importantly, his endorsements?" So many questions, so little time.

How to Choose a Good Marital Therapist

Seeking professional advice for your marital problems is no guarantee things will improve. In fact, many people have told me that their so-called marriage therapy even made things worse. Most therapists are well-meaning, but not always qualified to do marital therapy. That's why I want to offer some guidelines for you to consider should you seek professional help to improve your marriage.

Look Before You Leap: Divorce Isn't All That It's Cracked Up to Be

Even when desired changes occur as a result of divorce, they are not without unintended consequences. Read about the unexpected fallout of divorce.

The Foxes and the Rabbits

Have you ever said, "You started it," to your spouse when things have gone awry? Read this post to understand the real causes of problems in marriage. An individual's behavior often remains a mystery until you stand back and look at the bigger picture.

X-treme Reminders

Sometimes you  have to come preciptiously close to death to truly live...

Reeling From Infidelity

Every once in a while I step back and think about the messages I give to couples in my practice, seminars, keynotes and in my writing. To be sure, I have been a psychotic optimist about people's ability to survive whatever comes their way in terms of marital challenges.

The Marriage Map

As a long-time observer of relationships, I can tell you that, like children, marriages go through different developmental stages and predictable crises. But because people are unfamiliar with the normal hills and valleys of marriage, these predictable transitional periods are often misunderstood, causing over-reactions. Those who manage to weather these universal stormy periods usually come out the other side with greater love and commitment to their spouses. That's why I want to offer you a Marriage Map.

Too Broke to Break Up

Call me an optimist, but in the midst of all the horrendous economic news, I see a silver lining. Despite people's lives being threatened by job loss, foreclosures and having trouble making ends meet, increasing numbers of couples are opting to stay together and make their marriages work. Why? 

"Why Can't You Say It This Way?"

Do you ever find yourself in the midst of heated conversation when, all of a sudden, your partner says something that just takes your breath away? But as you mull things over, you realize, "It's not what he's saying, it's how he's saying it," or "If she would just word it differently, I might be able to respond less defensively."

The NEW New Year's Resolution

When nearly one out of every two marriages ends in divorce, why is it that people are so busy worshipping the Personal Improvement God/dess- wanting to be thinner, richer, healthier and smarter- rather than focusing on the improvements we can make to our important relationships in 2009?

Love Interrupted

Today, I will take out time from my marital musings to write about a personal experience so profound, that it has nearly stopped me dead in my tracks.