A Guide to the Fantasy Bond

Many struggles we face in our current interpersonal relationships arise from a core defense formed in childhood known as the “fantasy bond.”

Take Control of Who You Are in Your Relationship

In any relationship, we can never control the other person, but when we change our reactions to triggers, we're much more likely to shift the dynamic and get what we want.

How Embracing Vulnerability Strengthens Our Relationships

Many people struggle with vulnerability, but fail to realize the ways they protect or distance themselves from others. Being vulnerable in our actions can save our relationships.

Is Being Proud of Your Kids Really about You?

As parents, we can overly connect to our kids and fail to see them as separate people who own their own accomplishments. This leaves kids longing to be seen for who they truly are.

Is Cynicism Ruining Your Love Life?

Being open-minded and optimistic can enhance our well-being and mental health as well as our interpersonal relationships. Cynicism will often do the opposite.

Suicide in the Media

Talking about suicide is essential to getting people the help they need. However, the way in which we discuss, depict, and report on suicide is extremely important.

Are You the Pursuer or the Distancer in Your Relationship?

In most relationships, one partner has more desire for closeness, while the other has more need for distance. If you are part of a couple, which one are you?

Secrets to a Less Stressful Life

No matter what it is that’s making each of us anxious, we can all arm ourselves with the tools to help us stay calm, centered, and feeling strong in the face of challenges.

What Goes On in the Mind of Your Therapist?

Good therapists aim to see their clients without the overlays on their personality generated by the past, and they take steps to help people eventually see themselves the same way.

Creating a More Positive Identity

What keeps us from truly being ourselves? When we side with our inner critic, we accept a prescription for our identity that was written by our past but limits us in the present.

Be Mine: Dealing With Possessiveness in a Relationship

There are many ways people try to control their partners in an effort to calm their own emotions. How can we break these patterns and achieve an equal and trusting relationship?

Why Do People Have a Type?

We're often attracted to people for the wrong reasons. If we want to know why we keep winding up with the same type of person, the answer dates back to our earliest relationships.

Why Relationships Scare Us

Some people are afraid of being tied down, while others are terrified of being alone. Whatever our fears may be, they have roots in our past that we must understand to overcome.

How to Reduce Self-Criticism and Make Real Change

Self-criticism limits us and our ability to achieve our goals. To live a freer life as your true self, here are some psychological resolutions that are well worth making.

Let Go of Your Inner Critic, an Unwelcome Holiday Guest

To be the most present and ourselves during the holidays (or any season), we must let go of our inner critic.

The Importance of the Relationship in Therapy

What's ruptured in relationships is best healed in a relationship. An attuned therapist offers someone, not just a new way of looking at themselves but at relationships in general.

Is Your Past Controlling Your Life?

Many patterns we develop in our past shape how we act and react in the present. So, what are the ways we get stuck in the past and relive rather than live our lives?

The Only Way to Stay in Love

If we think of love as a verb, an action, and a way of being as opposed to a state of being, we can recognize that we hold a lot of power in our relationships.

The Many Benefits of Self-Compassion

In many ways, self-compassion is more beneficial to our psychological well-being than self-esteem.

How Standing Up for Yourself Helps You Fight Depression

To empower ourselves against depression, we have to stand up to our “critical inner voice” and practice self-compassion.

Nature as Medicine

Science now confirms just how good nature is for us, both extending and enhancing our lives. Learn all the ways nature benefits our minds and bodies.

5 Things We Can All Do to Help Stop Suicide

The suicidal state is almost always transient and temporary. If we intervene and get people the help they need, we can help save lives. To do this, we must educate ourselves.

The One Thing We All Should Do to Become Better Parents

Attachment research shows us that the very best thing we can do for our kids, whether they’re already born or arriving in the future, is to make sense of our own story.

5 Ways to Stay Close to Your Partner, Even When You Fight

The way we argue can dramatically affect our personal health and the health of our relationship. Here's how to resolve conflict in healthier.

Who’s the Boss in Your Relationship?

Equality is one of the most important elements of a relationship, but countless couples fall into roles that are unequal and generate problems.

7 Behaviors That Ruin a Relationship

What are the relationship pitfalls that keep us from maintaining the passion, attraction, admiration, and closeness we once felt for our partner?

4 Steps to a Better Relationship

Many of the ways act in our relationships are echoes of the past. How can we break our old patterns and become the person we want to be?

Where Our Relationship Patterns Come From

The way we experienced relationships in childhood creates an “internal working model” for how we view relationships throughout our lives.

Is Fear of Emotion Driving Our Addiction?

We are more likely to overcome an addiction when we learn to face our emotions rather than listening to an inner enemy that tells us to seek escape.

Resolving the Trauma You Didn't Know You Had

We've all experienced some degree of trauma. How well we cope in our lives today greatly depends on how much we are willing to recognize and make sense of these experiences.

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