How To Need Less Affirmation

We all need ego-strokes, but how many? Here are five ideas for going on an affirmation diet, without starving.

Your Three Languages and How to Speak Them Well

There's a lot of confusion about when it's best to be positive, negative and neutral. Here we sort it out.

What Most People Get Wrong About Critical Thinking Tools

Just because they defend their position with a weak argument, it doesn't mean their position is wrong. Weak arguments are irrelevant. Contrary to popular belief, they are not evidence that the position being supported by the argument is incorrect.

Love Is a Feeling, Love Is a Plan

Don't tell me you love me if you don't feel it, but tell me you love me when you don't feel it, yet still want to stay together.

Ten Tips For People Who Second-Guess Themselves

"Why do I second guess myself so much?" Oops. There you go again.

10 Uncommon Tips For Addressing The Self-Esteem Paradox

10 off-the-beaten-path tips for beating your path to sustainable calmfidence--calm confidence in your personal worth.

Exposing The One-Trick Phony

Jon Stewart has been teaching the same psychology lesson night after night, and its the right lesson for our tense, uncertain times.

Distinguishing Between Good and Bad Anxiety

Are you anxious? Should you be? It depends on whether your anxiety is founded or unfounded.

We Pay Adults To Work, So Why Not Pay Kids To Learn?

It's crazy: We expect children to be motivated by abstract arguments that wouldn't motivate adults, even though children are much worse at abstraction.

Striving To Maximize Both Charm and Chutzpah

Etiquette is no longer enough to make a gentleman or gentlewoman, and actually never was. Aspiring gents must strive to maximize etiquette and character, humility and boldness, always seeking for better ways to speak their minds and be heard.

The Trouble With "Shame On You! You Shouldn't Feel That!"

Some people shun negative emotions to purge them. It doesn't work.

10 Tips for More Efficient Listening

Better listening isn't more listening, it's listening more efficiently to what's worth heeding, not what's worth ignoring.

The Difference Between Rationalization and Rationality

Thinking fast; thinking slow is a hot topic these days, but it may be two topics confused with each other.

What I Learned From 2,000 Hours Of Freudian Psychoanalysis

Everything I learned from long psychoanalysis, distilled to nine bullet points. Can you learn it just by reading the list? Probably not but you may be learning it anyway.

The Most Overlooked Reason To Commit

You can't tell what a compromise will cost until you commit to it and start figuring out how to make it cost less.

Bite Your Tongue, Silence Is Often Delicious

The talking cure doesn't always cure. We psychology fans can be slow to learn the power of silence—safe, sound non-response to provocation, letting things pass rather than processing.

Owning Our Psychological Dark Matter

When we divvy responsibility for problems, we tend to take responsibility for consciously but not unconsciously motivated error, which can cause additional problems.

I-candy: Evidence That You’re A-OK

Your ability to stay committed in any relationship depends on how much self-affirming I-candy you expect and how much you can tolerate its absence.

Regret And Worry: A User’s Guide

Regret and worry have their place. Here's some background on them, helpful to keeping them in their place.

Facing Our Two-Facedness

We all want opposite things. Life goes better and gets more interesting when you admit that you do, too.

The Key To Relationship Success…And Failure

Today's most popular advice on successful marriage: Don't show criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. But this has couples criticizing each other for showing these traits, and defending against that accusation. The solution lies deeper than banishing these "four horsemen of the apocalypse."

8 Tips for Amateur Psychologists

"Don't psychologize or psychoanalyze me!" What's behind that ban and what can people interested in psychology do about it.

People Who Say “I Hate Game Playing” Play Them

Hate game playing? Hate it enough to wonder what's really behind it? If so read on.

You're NOT Being Irrational!

Rational means comparing, using ratios. We all do that, but sometimes we compare to the wrong things.

Not Just Curious: What In You Seeks Psychological Insights?

You could be watching cat videos but instead you read PT Blogs. Why is that? Here's one big appetite for psychological insight

Rocky Partnership? Here's How To Decide What To Do.

Compatibilities are easy. They're the free space on the bingo board of love. The incompatibilities will get you if you don't manage them well. Here's a quick but powerful test for inventorying the incompatibilities.

8 Tips For Teasing Lovingly To Relieve Partnership Tension

Healthy teasing can make partners feel safe and free. Unhealthy teasing can make partners feel unsafe and unfree. Here are a few ideas about how to stay on the healthy side of teasing, especially when your working to expand how safe and free you both feel.

The Key To Diagnosing Narcissism Diagnosers

Psychology Today's most popular articles are about how to diagnose narcissists. What drives our interest? Here are some factors to consider.

This May Explain Your Relationship Frustrations

Some people need to process, others try to avoid it. Both are looking for ways to feel safe and free within intimacy.

When You Can't Tell If They're Serious

It's fun to just browse the options, but sooner or later you have to prioritize.

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