Understanding Shyness

Shyness is the awkwardness or apprehension some people feel when approaching or being approached by other people. Unlike introverts, who feel energized by time alone, shy people often desperately want to connect with others, but don't know how or can't tolerate the anxiety that comes with human interaction.

Recent Posts on Shyness

Are You Strong Enough to Unplug for 24 Hours?

By Susan Newman Ph.D. on March 04, 2015 in Singletons
Everyone from your boss to your child’s teachers expects you to be connected and be reachable 24/7. What a relief it can be to unplug for one day and not be at the mercy of your “screens.” What happens when you unplug for a whole day?

An OCEAN Far Away: Big 5 Personality Factors in Star Wars

Which Star characters characters are the most open to experience while others are set in their ways? Who's the most conscientious or lackadaisy? Who are the extraverts, who's most agreeable, and who's most neurotic? Help rate the characters in order to find out together.

The Brain Is Not an Octopus

By Susan Greenfield Ph.D. on March 02, 2015 in Mind Change
Engaging in several tasks at once might seem like a wonderful solution for keeping pace with the speed of twenty-first-century life, but the price paid could be high.

Loneliness and Internet Use

At any given moment, hundreds of millions of people from all around the world are surfing the Internet, People rely on such networks to build and maintain their social contacts. Whether this new opportunity to be in social contact around the clock has enhanced people's well-being ?

Evaluating a Counselor, Coach, or Psychotherapist

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on March 01, 2015 in How To Do Life
Evaluation may be the most valuable skill we're not taught. I attempt to do so in this article.

8 Warning Signs Your Lover is a Narcissist

The Mayo Clinic research group defines narcissistic personality disorder as “a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration." How do you know when your romantic partner may be a narcissist? Here are eight telltale signs...

How to Get a Date by First Asking a Simple Question

Have you ever wanted to ask out someone you know, or get a date with an attractive stranger? In either case, you can increase your chances of getting a "yes" by first asking a simple question, or making a small request. Find out what the research has to say here...

Are Friends Really Worth That Much?

By Susan K Perry Ph.D. on February 27, 2015 in Creating in Flow
Have you ever reflected on the role of female friends in your own life? Do you maintain lifelong friendships? If not, do you wish you could?

9/11, President Obama and the Haunting of America

By Rupert W Nacoste Ph.D. on February 25, 2015 in A Quiet Revolution
Talk about being haunted. In the context of the shock of 9/11 and the shock of electing a non-white to the Presidency, America is filled with fear of psychological ghosts; filled with intergroup anxiety.

Athletes and the Spiral of Silence

By Bakari Akil II Ph.D. on February 22, 2015 in Communication Central
Do sports journalists intimidate athletes into silence?

Use Curiosity to Hook New Friends

“Curiosity hooks” act as silent invitations for people to initiate conversations.

Four Reasons You're Not Having Sex

Women want sex as much as men do, but sometimes life gets in the way.

What 50 Shades of Grey Tells Us About Women

By Denise Cummins Ph.D. on February 16, 2015 in Good Thinking
The phenomenal success of Fifty Shades of Grey is telling something important about the female psyche.

Is Your Teen an Observer, Asserter, Perfectionist or …?

By Susan Newman Ph.D. on February 16, 2015 in Singletons
So much about being a teen can be confusing and difficult. Understanding the nine Enneagram personality types could help your teen. What type is your teen and what does that say about the way he or she relates to others including you, her parents?

Fifty Shades of Grey

By Deborah Khoshaba Psy.D. on February 15, 2015 in Get Hardy
E. L. James' racy bestseller Fifty Shades of Grey has been called an amusing, romantic tale of a woman's exploration of sexual desire that has captured the interest and imagination of over 19 million readers. But, is there something more to the subject matter of this racy novel that has led to its huge success and the making of a movie? See this post!

Mass Shootings in America: Crisis and Opportunity

By Joe Pierre M.D. on February 12, 2015 in Psych Unseen
Why do some people commit mass murder? Is it violent entertainment, guns, mental illness... or something else that lurks inside all of us and is reflected in American culture?

Love Was Just Around the Corner

By Judith Coche Ph.D., ABPP on February 11, 2015 in No Ordinary Life
Just when Eva assumed love had passed her by it stopped to call and stayed a while. Perhaps the reason is that Eva has done superb work to strengthen her troubled family experiences and to build positivity and resilience. Join us as we stop in to see how she built her career and found a Valentine’s Day love just around the corner when she was 55.

The Greatest Challenge a Couple Faces, and 5 Ways to Beat It

By Kerry Patterson on February 11, 2015 in Crucial Conversations
According to a study, couples who argue effectively are 10 times more likely to have a happy relationship than those who struggle to discuss disagreements.

5 Ways to Get Your Unwanted Emotions Under Control

Being able to control your emotions is key to your happiness as well as your relationships. With these 5 strategies, you’ll be able to feel better and react more effectively to challenges both large and small.

Why 'Je Suis Charlie'

By George Michelsen Foy on February 06, 2015 in Shut Up and Listen!
Jihadists slaughtered Charlie Hebdo's staff for printing a provocative cartoon of Mohammed. The mass reaction in support of the satirical weekly teaches us something about France--and about essential freedoms as well (Part 1 of 2)

Birthdays Can Be Tough

If you lend your child the support he needs, his party will go more smoothly.

The "Precarious Manhood" of the Santa Barbara Shooter

By Frank T McAndrew Ph.D. on February 02, 2015 in Out of the Ooze
Each new mass shooting prompts the same old explanations for the tragedy: the lack of attention paid to mental illness, the easy availability of guns, misogyny, and a socially-sanctioned sense of male entitlement. These explanations dance around the BIG question, which is why is it always a man who does this, and why is it almost always a young man?

Testosterone v Oxytocin: Bridging the Gene-Behaviour Gap

Testosterone and oxytocin express the diametric opposition of genes that determine both mental illness and normality via their effects on the brain, mind, and behaviour.

Women Who Don't Orgasm

By Sari Cooper L.C.S.W. on January 28, 2015 in Sex Esteem
Many women profess being satisfied in sexual, but orgasm-less relationships. What's going on behind this trend?

The Deep Dark Secret of Feeling Shy

By Judith Coche Ph.D., ABPP on January 25, 2015 in No Ordinary Life
Gathering her courage to buy a pair of jeans that show off her lithe body, Elizabeth works in therapy to confront her anxiety through cognitive therapy. Little by little plans are made to work though more challenging situations till the shyness is manageable for the first time in Elizabeth’s life.

Your Anxiety & Relationships: Are You a Good Match?

By Robert Taibbi L.C.S.W. on January 25, 2015 in Fixing Families
There are 3 ways of coping with anxiety. How does your style match up with your partners?

Tough-Love Tips for Career Success

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on January 24, 2015 in How To Do Life
Advice you’d probably not hear but should.

Can You Get Addicted to Your Smartphone?

By Romeo Vitelli Ph.D. on January 19, 2015 in Media Spotlight
A new research study published in the Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication suggests that even a temporary loss of smartphone use can have an impact on the ability of heavy smartphone users to complete simple puzzles. The results suggest that not having a smartphone can lead to separation anxiety and problems with concentration.

Seven Ways Therapists Can Mess Up the Best OCD Treatment

By Seth J. Gillihan Ph.D. on January 17, 2015 in Think, Act, Be
Exposure and response prevention (ERP) is the treatment of choice for OCD. Learn about the common mistakes in ERP that can make it less effective, and how to avoid them. This entry is the first in a series.

Being Old in New York City

By Robin Marantz Henig on January 17, 2015 in Cusp
An article in this month's Politico magazine, "Seniors Take Manhattan," is all about the ways that it's easier to "age in place" in a big city than almost anywhere else in the U.S. The author, Debra Bruno, marshalls tons of evidence in defense of that position.