Understanding Jealousy

Jealousy is a complex emotion that encompasses many different kinds of feelings ranging from fear of abandonment to rage and humiliation. Jealousy can strike both men and women when a third-party threat to a valued relationship is perceived, it can be a problem among siblings competing for parental attention, or envy after a more successful friend. Conventional wisdom holds that jealousy is a necessary emotion because it preserves social bonds, but jealously usually does more harm than good, creating relationship conflict and strife.

Recent posts on Jealousy

When Love Becomes Infiltrated by Hate

Passionate love and hate are obsessive emotions, whereas indifference is a a kind of numbness that likely sparks an absence of action as opposed to reaction.

Infidelity, Open Relationships, and Polyamory

Some romantic partners are convinced that they can provide everything the other person needs. Not so.

Why We Hate Our Exes

Your craving for a dopamine fix that only your ex can provide can also make you angry and hateful toward the one person who is withholding your "drug" from you: your ex.

10 Essential Tips for Long-Term Love

By Roni Beth Tower Ph.D., ABPP on November 18, 2016 in Life, Refracted
Strategies that will help you transform the initial feelings of love into a life-long relationship.

In Ralph Nader's New Book, Animals Speak for Themselves

By Marc Bekoff Ph.D. on November 14, 2016 in Animal Emotions
In Ralph Nader's new book animals hold "The Great Talkout" and tell us what they want and need. In an interview with Mr. Nader he tells us about "Animal Envy" and much more.

Jealousy as a Narcissistic Wound

A psychological state that feels like jealousy to one person may not feel like jealousy to another.

Feeling Happy for Others Can Make You Happy

By Toni Bernhard J.D. on November 02, 2016 in Turning Straw Into Gold
Here’s my recipe letting other people’s joy make you happy. The true wonder of this is that the more you’re able to feel happy for others, the happier you’ll feel yourself.

Jealousy In Animals and Envy in Humans

By Peter Toohey Ph.D. on October 29, 2016 in Annals of the Emotions
Jealousy is usually said to be a character flaw in humans and in animals. But is it? Could learning to be jealous simply be the reflection of a normal character type?

I Am Caught Between My Daughter And Her Stepmother

By Barbara Greenberg Ph.D. on October 25, 2016 in The Teen Doctor
What To Do When Your Wife Dislikes Your Child

Tinder and Lasting Love?

What is Tinder? What can it lead to? Why are people on it? I decided to dive deeper and find the answers to those questions.

The True Nature of Jealousy

We usually know how to identify jealousy when it appears, and we can tell when someone else experiences jealousy, based on their actions—but what exactly is jealousy?

5 Ways Money Issues Can Ruin Relationships

By Andrea Bonior Ph.D. on September 23, 2016 in Friendship 2.0
Issues surrounding money are one of the most common conflicts within relationships, even where there is plenty of love. Here are five ways that money damages partnerships.

The Antidote to Envy

Envy tells us that someone, somewhere has it all—but it just isn’t true. The best we can do is be thankful for what we have and try to do something useful with it.

The Downside of Narcissism

By Roberta Satow Ph.D. on September 19, 2016 in Life After 50
Despite the pleasure of feeling like everything revolves around you, feeling like the sun has certain disadvantages as well—it makes other people angry and envious.

The Ubiquity of Envy Is Fueling an Epidemic of Entitlement

By Christopher Bergland on September 19, 2016 in The Athlete's Way
Of four basic personality types, a new study reports that "Envious" was the most common. How is envy linked to the epidemic of entitlement? What can we do to break this cycle?

When You Stay in Touch With an Ex

By Gwendolyn Seidman Ph.D. on September 18, 2016 in Close Encounters
New research shows having contact with an ex could harm a new relationship; whether it does depends on the motives for staying in touch.

I'm Not Sure How To Give My Daughter Relationship Advice

By Barbara Greenberg Ph.D. on September 14, 2016 in The Teen Doctor
What To Say To Your Daughter Who Is Having Boyfriend Trouble

Why You and Your Partner Need to Celebrate Each Other

It's a bonding experience when our partner helps celebrate our successes and is not envious of our good fortune.

Mentally Strong People Don't Resent Other People's Success

Seeing people have what you want can be hard. But resenting their success will rob you of mental strength.
 StockLite/Shutterstock

When You’re in Love With a Beautiful Woman (or Man)

By Robert Burriss Ph.D. on August 31, 2016 in Attraction, Evolved
New research shows that we keep a closer eye on our love rivals if our partner is hotter than us.
Pixabay

What "Make America Great Again" Means

By Karen L Smith MSS, LCSW on August 27, 2016 in Full Living
In this political climate, and with this upcoming election, judging/mocking/shaming/hating/spewing isn’t going to get us an America that embraces and supports all its citizenry.

Sibling Rivalry

By Roberta Satow Ph.D. on August 10, 2016 in Life After 50
Is sibling rivalry inevitable? What can parents do to minimize it?

Cheating and Consensual Non-Monogamy

People can cheat before, during, and after consensual non-monogamous relationships. This cheating can be emotional and/or physical, involving lying or broken safer sex agreements.

The Opposite of Jealousy

By Isadora Alman MFT, CST on August 03, 2016 in Sex & Sociability
Is jealousy a natural part of a romantic or sexual relationship? It doesn't have to be.

Competing for Love

By Roberta Satow Ph.D. on July 27, 2016 in Life After 50
Is competition for your adult children's love making you miserable? Managing competitive feelings without acting on them can be a major challenge.

Are you Facebook Official?

By Martin Graff Ph.D. on July 17, 2016 in Love, Digitally
Social networking has increased the propensity for jealousy. Females desire a degree of approval from others and tend to define themselves in terms of others.

Does Jealousy Help or Hurt Your Relationship?

By David Ludden Ph.D. on July 13, 2016 in Talking Apes
An expression of jealousy can either increase or decrease your partner’s relationship satisfaction, depending on the circumstances.

Other People's Great Vacations Don't Have to Get to You

When you’re stuck at home or in the office while others flaunt their fabulous journeys around the world, it can be tough. This will help you get over your case of vacation envy.

5 Ways to Tell If Your Relationship Is Built to Last

Are you riddled with angst over whether or not all is well and secure in your romantic partnership? Here are five ways to help determine if you need to let this relationship go.

Myth: My Jealousy Shows How Much I Love My Partner

You have betrayed me. You have ruined our beautiful world.