All About Friendship

Anais Nin put it beautifully when she said, "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born." Though some natural loners are happy without them, most of us depend greatly on the company of true friends. As with any relationship, friendships bring support and joy and occasionally strife. Here's how to make friends, understand friendship better, and be a great confidante to others.

Recent Posts on Friends

Friendship Gardens – the Modern Victory Gardens

By Ravi Chandra M.D. on November 18, 2015 The Pacific Heart
A meditation about both changes in San Francisco and the necessity of community, home and belonging in this time of war and refugees. World War II called for Victory Gardens. Maybe our time of division calls for Friendship Gardens.

Male-Female Interactions: Don’t Get Your Signals Crossed

In any relationship the interaction between individuals is carried out through both words and actions. It is not only what is said but also the way it is said.

Resilient Family Outcomes Through Polyaffectivity

The second in a series of three on resilience, this blog looks at how polyamorous families de-emphasize sexuality and focus instead on polyaffectivity -- the non-sexual connections among family members -- to sustain connections over time. Useful for blended monogamous families, the poly ability to flex with changing circumstances is key to the resilience of polyaffectivity

I'm Torn Between 2 Men

"I need help on deciding which guy to date."

The Naked Emperor and the Vanishing Veteran

Whispered about but generally hidden, the dramatic decrease of support for veterans must be exposed and changed.

How to Help Someone With an Eating Disorder

By Emily T. Troscianko on November 09, 2015 A Hunger Artist
What should you do if you think or know that someone you care about has an eating disorder? What shouldn’t you do? What can you do?

Mourning a Loved One

By E E Smith on November 08, 2015 Not Born Yesterday
It's hard to imagine now but, as a girl of 20, I was not fond of the man who had just become my brother-in-law. I was even a little afraid of him during the early years of my marriage to his brother. He was gruff, irreverent and cynical, with a wry sense of humor that often left me wondering whether he was deadly serious or only joking.

How Your Flaky Friend May Have Gotten That Way

By Kira Asatryan on November 05, 2015 The Art of Closeness
Can flaking on social engagements indicate a deeper issue? Yes. Learn the signs.

Relationships and Being a Great Partner

You might be wondering how being single has anything to do with being in a successful relationship with others, but it does.

Finding Hope and Security in Relationships

Scientific research demonstrates that you can learn to become a “secure base” for others in order to help them develop confidence and hope for the future. You also can learn how to pick people who can provide a secure base to you and give you the sensitivity and support that you deserve in creating a life full of hope and promise.

How to Help Someone in an Abusive Relationship

By Shawn M. Burn Ph.D. on October 17, 2015 Presence of Mind
Is a friend or relative in an abusive intimate relationship? How can you best help?

Friends Are the New Family

By Alexis Hatcher on October 16, 2015 Psy-College-y Today
Although college is largely portrayed as an academic endeavor, other areas of life shouldn’t be neglected so that a degree can be pursued—I’d argue, in fact, that these require even greater attention.

9 Signs It's Time to Get a Toxic Person Out of Your Life

Is there a toxic person dragging you down or holding you back? Cutting that person out of your life may be the healthiest thing to do.

The One Word That Can Kill a Friendship

By Kira Asatryan on October 14, 2015 The Art of Closeness
This one word - that you use every day - pushes friends away more than any other. Learn what it is and what alternatives will keep your friends close!

Mom Dating 101

The introvert/socially anxious/exhausted/shy mom's guide to making new friends.

Young Couples and Their Couple Friends

By Geoffrey Greif Ph.D. on October 13, 2015 Buddy System
How do newly-formed couples make friends with other couples?

Sexual And Romantic Minimalism

By Jeremy E Sherman Ph.D. on October 12, 2015 Ambigamy
Are you wasting the time of your life in habitual pursuit of sex and romance?

Ava’s Shelled Friends: Motivating Children’s Learning

Ava and Sara learn to appreciate the ecosystem in their playtime with our famous neighboring turtles.

When an Irresponsible Friend Asks for Money

An irresponsible friend is threatened with losing his home and asks a friend to bail him out. Because he’s helped her in the past, what does she owe him?

What makes Online Friendships Work?

Can online "friendships with strangers" be as meaningful as face-to-face friendships can be?

13 Ways to Tell Whether It's Love or Manipulation

By Jeremy E Sherman Ph.D. on October 08, 2015 Ambigamy
Understanding how affirmations work will help hone your ability to discriminate between genuine and manipulative flattery.

Can Your Child's Friends Affect How Much He or She Learns?

By Garth Sundem on October 06, 2015 Brain Trust
A study in the British Journal of Developmental Psychology explores how friends influence each other's school skills.

The New App That Could Help You Lose Friends

The new Peeple app lets you rate everyone from your friends, neighbors and co-workers to ex-romantic partners just like you rate businesses on Yelp. I like technology, but Peeple is a bad idea and is not going to work out well. Here's why.

The Opposite of Addiction is Connection

In an increasingly well-known TED Talk titled “Everything You Think You Know About Addiction is Wrong,” British journalist Johann Hari discusses the available research into the underlying causes of addiction and concludes, rather brilliantly, that the opposite of addiction is not sobriety, it’s connection.

7 Ways to Make Your Most Difficult Conversations Easier

By Andrea Bonior Ph.D. on September 29, 2015 Friendship 2.0
The need to talk about something difficult can fill us with anxiety, whether at work or in our romantic, family, or friend relationships. Often we enter these conversations without being mindful of how to make them go the best they possibly can-- and we can make things far worse if we're not prepared. Here are important factors to consider when planning the interaction.

Why You Trust Your Friends Even When They're Ripping You Off

By David DiSalvo on September 29, 2015 Neuronarrative
Your brain wants to trust. We’re wired for social connection—not just casual meet and greets, but genuine connection—and trust is what makes it work. But that same drive to trust, essential though it is, also makes us natural born suckers.

The 7 Habits of Socially Connected People

By Kira Asatryan on September 29, 2015 The Art of Closeness
All socially successful people behave in basically the same way. What are their secrets? Find out now!

Is It Time to End a Friendship?

How often do you prefer to hide behind texts or emails when you have a difficult message to convey?

Balancing Old and New Friendships Isn't Always Easy

How do you strike a balance between variety in friendship groups while forging deeper bonds with a chosen few?

The Day I Played Against Yogi Berra, and He Let Me Win

By Bella DePaulo Ph.D. on September 23, 2015 Living Single
Many years ago, George Plimpton chose me to play on his team of fans. We took on the Mickey Mantle All-Stars in Yankee Stadium, and Mantle, Whitey Ford, Yogi Berra and the rest of the team let us win.