All About Assertiveness

Demonstrating assertiveness means there's no question where you stand, no matter the topic. Cognitively, to be assertive implies a lack of anxious thoughts in light of stress. Behaviorally, assertiveness is all about asking for what you want in a manner that respects others. Assertive people don't shy away from defending their points of view or goals, or from trying to influence others. In terms of affect, assertiveness means reacting to positive and negative emotions without aggression or resorting to passivity.

Recent posts on Assertiveness

The Serenity Prayer and 16 Variations

By Jeremy E Sherman Ph.D. on March 14, 2017 in Ambigamy
The Serenity Prayer is extraordinary moral guidance, not some unworkable "always do X" rule, but a way to frame up a fundamental judgment call we all have to make over and over.

How to Have Difficult Conversations

By Dan Mager MSW on March 13, 2017 in Some Assembly Required
Most everyone dreads the difficult conversation. However, with planning and preparation you can maximize the chances that your conversation will serve its intended purpose.
Used by permission.

Wounded by Sarcasm

By Steve Albrecht DBA on March 05, 2017 in The Act of Violence
Sarcasm is often mean words in disguise.

3 Strategies for Saying 'No'

By Katherine Hawley Ph.D. on February 28, 2017 in Trust
At work and at home, 'yes' can get us into trouble.

Don't Let Them Kill Your Dreams

By Mridu Khullar Relph on February 27, 2017 in Culturally Incorrect
Why does everyone try to dissuade you from expressing your true desires? Here's how to keep those negative voices out of your head and truly go after your big goals and desires

Can Punctuality Ruin Love?

By Aaron Ben-Zeév Ph.D. on February 23, 2017 in In the Name of Love
There are good reasons for considering punctuality to be a virtue. Is it also a romantic virtue? There are reasons to think it is not.

Find a Way

At 1:55 pm EDT on September 2, 2013, Diana Nyad, age 64, reached the shore of Key West Florida 53 hours after plunging into the Bay in Havana, Cuba

A Life-Pivoting Change of Identity

By Jeremy E Sherman Ph.D. on February 14, 2017 in Ambigamy
Hunger for pride can become dangerously addictive. Abandoning pride and being proud no matter what, don't solve it. Instead, change what you're proud of.

Are the Physically Attractive Also Happier?

The surprising finding was that gorgeous models who made a living from being beautiful, suffered lower well-being and greater personality maladjustment than non-models.

The Danger of Confronting the Family Member Who Hurt You

The more serious the harm, the less likely that the person who hurt you will ever get it.

Hearts, Candies, and Work

How to be sociable yet still get your work done.

Zombie Nerves

By Kirby Farrell Ph.D. on February 08, 2017 in A Swim in Denial
When reality feels overwhelming, popular fantasies can simplify and highlight important themes.

How Androgyny Works (Part 2)

By Audrey Nelson Ph.D. on January 30, 2017 in He Speaks, She Speaks
You have heard the saying, ―Our greatest strength is also our greatest weakness. This is a man’s job, we say, or that’s women’s work.
Used by permission from

When It Comes to Caring, More Brake, Less Gas Pedal

By Steve Albrecht DBA on January 30, 2017 in The Act of Violence
Most of the time, you don't need to care so much.

How to Stand Up for Yourself (Without Feeling Like a Jerk)

By Andy Molinsky Ph.D. on January 28, 2017 in Adaptation
Jump start your confidence with these 3 simple tips for speaking more assertively.

Check Yourself: Common Mental Health Mistakes

By Noam Shpancer Ph.D. on January 25, 2017 in Insight Therapy
These common mental health ‘blunders’ that may undermine well-being.

Failure to Launch: Whose Problem is it Anyway?

By Dena Kouremetis on January 17, 2017 in The Unedited Offspring
Do you have a hanger-on adult child? Do you still cover car insurance or cell phone bills for your 25 year old? It's time to realize this is YOUR problem, and not theirs.

7 Bargaining Tips for Reasonable People

Donald Trump's proposed tax cuts are one way that your bottom line can increase. But you are in control of another way: negotiating. Learn how to become a better bargainer.
Used by permission from

Road Rage Revisited

By Steve Albrecht DBA on January 09, 2017 in The Act of Violence
Road rage is getting worse and more dangerous. Road ragers and their victims need help to cope in different ways.

There’s No Such Thing as "You Made Your Bed, Now Lie in It"

Anyone who insists that you must forever stay with your original choices is asking you to remain frozen in time.

Is Guilt Affecting How You Manage Your Child's ScreenTime?

By Victoria L. Dunckley M.D. on January 03, 2017 in Mental Wealth
Parental guilt can undermine the best of intentions when it comes to restricting children's screentime. Here's how to give guilt the boot.

2017: The Year To Break Outside Your Comfort Zone

By Andy Molinsky Ph.D. on January 02, 2017 in Adaptation
Instead of justifying why you shouldn’t take that leap, see if you can convince yourself about why you should.

Delete Your Power Points; Tell Your Story Instead

Want to change behavior and create traditions? Here's how leaders do it.

Managing Your Holiday Identity Crisis

By Tara Well Ph.D. on December 24, 2016 in The Clarity
Do holiday gatherings leave you questioning yourself? A few tips can boost your confidence.

Madonna's Tenacity: Naysayers Can Be a Source of Motivation

By Christopher Bergland on December 15, 2016 in The Athlete's Way
Madonna's "2016 Woman of the Year" speech at the Billboard awards offers fresh clues for ways to reframe the cynicism of naysayers and turn vitriol into a source of inspiration.

When Your Boss Is a Bully

Bullies lose power if you don't cower. How to stand up for yourself and come out on top.

The Essence of a First Memory of Life: The Core Theme

By Arthur J. Clark Ed.D. on December 11, 2016 in Dawn of Memories
Why the main idea of an early recollection in life matters.

9 Holiday Resolutions for Sanity, Safety, and Joy

By Meg Selig on December 06, 2016 in Changepower
Why wait for the New Year to make a vow to change? To give yourself the gifts of comfort, joy, and sanity, try these 9 Holiday Resolutions on for size.

More Than Just a Face (or Title)

Understanding the psychology behind individual relationships in the workplace.

The Two Conversations You’re Having When You Negotiate

By Andy Molinsky Ph.D. on December 05, 2016 in Adaptation
The two conversations you’re having when you negotiate (hint: one is with yourself).