The Power of Knowing Your Neighbors: From Hello to Help

Source: Kelly-Ann Allen

I have great neighbours. Three houses wrap around ours, and between us, something quite lovely has formed. We cut a hole in one fence so the kids could chat, share drawings, and poke through hand-me-down clothes. Playdates, craft trades, and friendly notes are all routine now. One week, our bin wasn’t collected. A newer neighbour wheeled theirs over for us to use. We had barely met, and there they were, sharing something so oddly personal. Their bin!

Does their kindness shape my sense of belonging to where I live? Definitely. But it’s not always obvious. When things are going well, belonging can be harder to spot. Until something jarring pulls it into focus. For some, it might be, a nasty neighbour, a fence dispute, tension over missing Uber delivery meals, or rogue bees from a backyard hobby hive causing chaos. But when everything ticks along, belonging can hum in the background like white noise.

Belonging has been spotlighted in schools, universities, and some workplaces. But less attention is given to the place where we live: our suburbs and communities, neighbourhoods, and local networks. The immediate people around us that can be called upon in emergencies—big or small. The ones that might notice something out of order.

The bygone rituals that once created incidental connection points, like borrowing a cup of sugar, have slowly slipped away. Busy lives, shifting work hours, and the convenience of modern living mean we might not rely on our neighbours as we once did. As a result, many people simply don’t know who lives around them (Stanley et al., 2010). This matters. Familiarity is a known facilitator of belonging. Without it, people can feel less safe. A lack of safety is a known disruptor of belonging.

Research suggests that even knowing some neighbours can make a difference. A randomised controlled trial across Australia, the UK, and the U.S. found that simple acts of kindness towards neighbours—like lending a hand or saying hello—can reduce loneliness and improve well-being (Lim et al., 2024). The study found that knowing as few as six neighbours was enough to significantly improve outcomes for participants (also see Nextdoor, 2020). Not deep friendships. Just the basics, like being able to recognise a face or say hello over the fence.

Neighbours can influence our feelings of being valued and accepted within our surroundings, which are key markers of belonging. For some older adults, neighbours can play a more active role in day-to-day well-being than family, particularly when families live far away or contact is infrequent. Local contact protects against isolation and supports well-being (Sanchez-Moreno et al., 2025). For people with serious mental health challenges, even light interaction with neighbours improves connection and reduces exclusion (Kriegel et al., 2019).

But belonging doesn’t just happen for everyone. People who have recently migrated to Australia, for example, have found some Australian suburbs unusually quiet and disconnected, especially compared to their countries of origin, where neighbours are often the first point of contact and source of social support (Hebbani et al., 2017). For Sudanese former refugees in Brisbane, Hebbani and colleagues found that limited neighbour interaction contributed to feelings of social isolation and made the settlement process more difficult. When neighbourly connection is absent, belonging can be much harder to build.

Still, change doesn’t need to be complicated. Across Australia and beyond, simple initiatives are making a difference: walking groups, street libraries, community gardens, and shared pantries. Nothing costly. Just opportunities to connect.

In Canada, the Calgary Catholic Immigration Society applied the Integrative Framework of Belonging as part of the Calgary Catholic Immigration Society Alberta Municipalities’ Community Readiness for Newcomer Integration Project. Led by Jennifer Mah, the initiative used the framework’s components—competencies, opportunities, motivations, and perceptions—to inform community-based supports for newcomers. Increasing opportunities for newcomers to belong, such as hosting neighbourly meetings, bonding events, open activities in the parks, and municipally-led cultural programming, were found to foster cordiality, meet neighbours, and feel accepted in their new communities. Nearly half of newcomers in Medicine Hat and Foothills linked these events to specifically increasing their sense of belonging.

Belonging isn’t about numbers. The people who live nearby matter.

So here’s a thought. Start small. Try the Know Your Neighbours challenge (shown below, or you can download it here in U.S. and AU spelling). See how many boxes you can tick!

Source: Kelly-Ann Allen