Nancy Berns Ph.D.

Freedom to Grieve

Finding Joy in Ordinary Moments

Don't make this common mistake that robs you of joy.

Posted Feb 29, 2016

Today is leap day.  As with many occasions, there are social media and marketing attempts to make your leap day extra special.  

What can you do in one day?  Don’t waste your extra 24 hours! 

I’m all for making the most of every day.    However, I don’t like the pressure of these “special days.” Yes, it is fun to do special things on leap day, but in our culture it seems we more often stress the extraordinary moments over joy in the ordinary.  

And there is nothing ordinary about joy in ordinary moments. People who have experienced the death of a close friend or family member deeply understand the joy of ordinary moments.   

Nancy Berns
Source: Nancy Berns

Too often we miss the beauty of ordinary until it is gone.  And there is a lot of wonderful things to appreciate in the everyday.   Take time to just appreciate the beauty in life.  Don't make the mistake of waiting until everything is going well before you find joy in the moments. Don’t wait for a special occasion.  Don’t wait for everything to be in order. Don’t wait for all your pain to be healed.

Our days are numbered and if leap day helps us to think about the precious nature of time, then that’s great.  Obviously that is a preferred way to learn the value of time rather than waiting until you or a loved one is facing death.  

We will all face the pain of loss.  We can use our grief and the lessons learned through loss to live more courageously and intentionally each day.   That is why I encourage people to take hope in knowing you can carry grief and joy together.   

We cannot afford to wait until everything in life is tidy before appreciating the joy in ordinary moments.   Give thanks for what you have even as you grieve for what you are missing.  Live fully by finding joy in the ordinary moments.