Advice: The Loveless Marriage

Advice to a woman who wants both sex and love in her relationship with best friend/husband.

By Hara Estroff Marano, published on January 1, 2004 - last reviewed on January 23, 2015

I am 52 and married to a very healthy 78-year-old man. About
the only thing we have in common is that we both enjoy going to dinner
and a movie. He is a godsend. He’s kind, helps me around the
house, supports me when I need it and takes care of me now that I have
health issues. I have never been attracted to him physically and we
have absolutely no sex life. I believe he is OK with this. I married
him because he is my best friend. What advice can you

One, count your blessings. Focus on what you do have, which is a
lot. Two, ask your husband what he thinks of your sex life and what
he’s willing to do to make it better for both of you. You did say
that he’s your best friend, didn’t you?