Hallucinated Happiness

Imagination doesn’t make it so.

The Back-to-School-Night Speech We'd Like to Hear*

An imaginary principal delivers an exercise in wish fulfillment

Eating Disorders: 4 Reasons to Choose Recovery

No one chooses to have an eating disorder, but they can choose recovery.

Why Women Don't Make the First Move

In the rules of dating, it’s all about control

Does Mindfulness Really Make Us Resilient?

The evidence misrepresents the truth: we need far more than emotional regulation

Inside The Mind of the Mass Killer

Can psychology prevent killers such as Oregon gunman Chris Harper Mercer?

The Latest

What Trump Can Learn About Leadership From His Daughter

Leadership is in the news these days. The primaries race for the Presidential candidacy has really put the spotlight on this issue. For anyone in a leadership role self-awareness and reflection can make a big difference in your leadership success.

An Overwhelmed Graduate Student

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on October 04, 2015 in How To Do Life
A transcript of a part of my session with a client. Many lessons embedded.
Debunking the Myth of Laziness

Debunking the Myth of Laziness

Debunking the Myth of Laziness. 7 reasons “slackers” don’t exert effort. Laura D. Miller, LCSW

Hallucinated Happiness

By Joachim I Krueger Ph.D. on October 03, 2015 in One Among Many
If only imagination could sustain our happiness! Alas, we remain shackled to reality. Examples of continued attempts to psych ourselves into happiness – or others into unhappiness – range from the entertaining to the disturbing.
We Want to Accept Our Feelings, But How Do We Do It?

We Want to Accept Our Feelings, But How Do We Do It?

Focusing was developed through research into psychotherapy effectiveness. Eugene Gendlin found that those clients who were attending to their bodily felt experience in a caring, gentle way were making the most progress in psychotherapy. This article describes Focusing as a path of befriending our experience just as it is.

Resilience, Growth & Kintsukuroi

By John Sean Doyle on October 03, 2015 in Luminous Things
Standing and staring in the face of broken promises and broken dreams, eye-to-bloodshot-eye with our most assiduous fears, sometimes we discover that we were stronger than we imagined: that we can withstand more and that there is no reason to fear.

Yes, It Really Is Possible To Avoid Arguments. Part I.

When faced with a threat to our ability to influence or control our place in an important relationship, ancient fears can be activated that awaken memories or trauma from previous experiences in which others who possessed greater authority than ourselves may have exploited our vulnerability or dependency on them in ways that were hurtful or damaging to us.

Because Someone’s Got to Do It: How to Be a Critical Thinker

By Kyle D Killian Ph.D., LMFT on October 03, 2015 in Intersections
Why it's good to resist the allure of black and white thinking, single sources of information, and conversations only with persons who always absolutely agree with you.

The Back-to-School-Night Speech We'd Like to Hear*

By Alfie Kohn on October 03, 2015 in The Homework Myth
Sit in a school auditorium listening to a list of rules and procedures, on the one hand, and numbing banalities about how "all children can learn," on the other hand -- and dream of a presentation that gets to the heart of what schooling could be like if kids (and learning) really mattered most...
Cooperation and the public good

Cooperation and the public good

Social scientists differ about the relative virtues of top-down verses peer-to-peer actions to secure public goods like clean water and air and safe foods and pharmaceuticals. Recent decision experiments suggest that in modern societies, both dimensions are necessary, and that they’re complementary to each other.

Christopher Harper-Mercer fits the profile

By Clark McCauley Ph.D. on October 03, 2015 in Friction
Could we have predicted violence from Christopher Harper-Mercer?

Raw or Cooked? How Best to Eat 11 Fruits and Vegetables

By Marlynn Wei M.D., J.D. on October 03, 2015 in Urban Survival
Are raw or cooked fruits or vegetables better? Find out which ones are better eaten raw or cooked and how best to cook them.

The Hidden Trait that Predicts Being Attractive

Finding love is a tricky game. New evidence suggests that others' interest in you might be tied to your dispositional mindfulness.

Oregon Murders and Risk Factors for Mass Shootings

By Carrie Barron M.D. on October 03, 2015 in The Creativity Cure
There are clear psychological, biological and situational risk factors for mass shootings. Greater public awareness of what they are can help us figure out preventions.

Eating Disorders: 4 Reasons to Choose Recovery

By Jennifer Rollin MSW, LGSW on October 03, 2015 in Mindful Musings
Are you struggling with an eating disorder? Choosing recovery will enable you to reclaim your life.

Do You Work for a Demanding 'Type A' Boss?

By Victor Lipman on October 03, 2015 in Mind of the Manager
Type A managers, of which there are many, can at times be impatient, stressful, and plain old hard to work for. Here are practical tips to help you survive, and even succeed.

Why Women Don't Make the First Move

In the traditional world of dating, men ask and women wait to be asked. A new dating app is changing the rules, but what makes women wait in the first place?

Does Mindfulness Really Make Us Resilient?

By Michael Ungar Ph.D. on October 03, 2015 in Nurturing Resilience
When Todd Sampson demonstrated that neuroplasticity could make his ordinary brain extraordinary, he forgot to mention that he had an amazing arsenal of supports helping him achieve his goals. Mindfulness practices may help us focus and regulate our emotions, but their ability to change our lives is vastly over-rated.

Purkinje Cells Burst to Life with State-Dependent Excitation

By Christopher Bergland on October 03, 2015 in The Athlete's Way
Neuroscientists have discovered that Purkinje neurons in the cerebellum toggle between a silent "down" state and a bursting "up" state depending on levels of electrical activity.

The Story Game

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on October 03, 2015 in How To Do Life
A game you can play with yourself or a client that can yield key revelations.

Inside The Mind of the Mass Killer

Knoll wonders if the true solution to mass murder might involve a three pronged approach - better media responsibility over reporting these incidents, tighter gun regulation and improved mental health services.

The Age of Decentralized, Distributed Knowledge

By Po Chi Wu Ph.D. on October 02, 2015 in Jacob's Staff
For centuries, the flow of information has followed the structure of organizations. This is no longer true. What changes have resulted from the explosion in connectivity and information-sharing? How are organizations and leadership struggling to cope? How will our lives be affected? What can we learn from the resistance to innovation/change?

Connection: The Gift That Keeps on Giving

By Amy Banks on October 02, 2015 in Wired For Love
No matter who you are or where you live, when you are in healthy relationships you increase the chance of living longer and dying happier.

Social Engineer Gun Violence or Accept the Consequences.

We have made the country safer by socially engineering car safety as well as other issues related to smoking, vaccinations, and various consumer protections. Other developed countries have much better track records regarding gun safety than we do. Perhaps taking a page from their playbook isn’t such a bad idea if we have the will to do so.

New Peeple App Is Bad for People

The new Peeple app lets you rate everyone from your friends, neighbors and co-workers to ex-romantic partners just like you rate businesses on Yelp. I like technology, but Peeple is a bad idea and is not going to work out well. Here's why.

6 Surprising Benefits of Self-Compassion

Do you ever call yourself names or beat yourself up over the mistakes you make? If so, you might be missing out on the incredible benefits of self-compassion.

Who Is The Real Father of Sex Addiction?

By David J Ley Ph.D. on October 02, 2015 in Women Who Stray
Who is the true father of sex addiction? Could it be a man who treated homosexuality as an addiction?

Fear of Damage to Children in Polyamorous Families

Because polyamory is stigmatized in conventional society, many poly parents or other adults who love children being raised in poly families are concerned about how growing up in a polyamorous family might affect children. In this blog I include a question from a concerned mother and my response to her concerns about how her relationships might impact her kids.

Why Are Little Girls' Halloween Costumes Still So Sexy?

I just read about the concerned mom who wrote a letter to Party City, outraged about this year's Halloween costumes for little girls. She was particularly furious about a sexy police girl costume marketed to young girls. I agree. Every year when I take my daughter Halloween costume shopping, I wonder how this hot and sexy trend for young girls will impact girls' futures...

Biggus Bangus

By Joachim I Krueger Ph.D. on October 02, 2015 in One Among Many
In the beginning was god and god made the big bang. But who make god? Five-year olds want to know, but seasoned christian cosmogonists have forgotten this question. They rather create god in their own image – projectively.