We claim we have integrity either by holding ourselves as a fixed point, consistently correct in an inconsistent world, or by allowing ourselves to float, change and learn to accommodate the world. Read More
The road to self-acceptance may well be acceptance of other people, flaws and all. This 16-item test will tell whether you’re someone who others can turn to, no matter what, and they know they’ll be welcomed. More importantly, these items will also help you become more accepting of yourself and create your own no-judgment zone. Read More
Sharing housework has a definite impact on couples' sex lives. One study found that couples who divide chores along traditional roles have more sex. But a new, more comprehensive study turns those findings upside down. Read More
One wrong turn as a juvenile and you may be facing life imprisonment. Considering the developmental maturity levels of youth, what are the chances they will be living with this decision the rest of their lives?
Increasingly in love, anything goes. Partner how you want with whom you want. But that doesn't mean all is fair in love. If you're not feeling it, you absolutely owe your partner clear signals. And you owe your partner receptivity to such signals. Don't turn love into a moral issue. It isn't one. But honest signaling is. It's not fair to string a partner along. Read More
When you suspect an ulterior motive, does it discredit good motives? Yes and no, which is a good reason to pay less attention to psychologizing accusations ("You just want a bad thing!") and to psychologizing self-defense ("No, I just want this good thing!") and more attention to actions. Words speak louder than actions, but actions speak more accurately than words. Read More
The injunction to "be real" can often be an excuse to be insensitive and mean. We create safer, more fulfilling relationships as we notice how our manner of self-expression affects others. Being authentic with others needs to be based upon being authentic with ourselves--uncovering what we are most deeply feeling and longing for, which is often something more vulnerable. Read More