Getting Laid Over 60

Finding Meaning and Sexual Satisfaction in Later Life

Sex Over 60

Harry, I congratulate you on bringing this important 'taboo' topic to light in one of our major publications.

It's time to throw off the shackles of shame and silence surrounding the issues of sexuality in post-prime years, and to embrace an inclusive and realistic approach to dealing with the fact that everyone wants to get laid, regardless of age. Now, 'getting laid' may entail very different things to different people, but that is true at any age!

Check out a blog on the subject I wrote a few months back entitled "Sex In The Forgotten Years" for further detail on MY take at:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/danielle-cavallucci/sex-in-the-forgotten-y...

Clearly, I'm on your side, and am looking forward to seeing how this blog space unfolds. Here's to healthy sexuality at any age!!

Warmest regards,

Danielle Cavallucci
author, "Your Orgasmic Pregnancy: Little Sex Secrets Every Hot Mama Should Know"

I THINK THAT PEOPLE OVER THE

I THINK THAT PEOPLE OVER THE AGE OF SIXTY TODAY LOOK AND FEEL YOUNGER THAN PEOPLE DID SAY 40 YEARS AGO, EVEN 20 YEARS AGO. IF YOU LOOK AND FEEL LIKE HAVING SEX, THEN WHY NOT! I'M A SIXTY YEAR OLD WOMAN AND I HAVE MORE THAN ONE SEX PARTNER AND WE LOVE IT! BY THE WAY, I TAKE CARE OF MY APPEARANCE AND BODY.

sex & aging

Karin, I agree with you all the way...HOWEVER I have a husband I love (he's 66) and he is just not interested any more. We had a good sex life although his sex drive was never that strong. The longer we don't do"it" the less I care about sex but I miss it a lot...I especially miss being desired. I haven't had any sex (does naked hugging count?) for 5 years. Any ideas?

Harriet

Harriet I am glad you said

Harriet
I am glad you said what you said, as it is my belief that older women, over 55 maybe, are not that interested in sex anymore. So it is refreshing to have you make those statements. I am 67, male and am in similar circumstances. I my case my spouse invited me to divorce her as she developed a case of herpes (below the belt) and said she never wanted to be responsible for giving me this condition so if I really thought that sex was that important, then she would let me go (divorce). So here I am 3 years later and still married and living at home but missing that sexual connection. I am wanting to have a female friend but have not yet pursued that (this is not hitting on you, i just need to say these things). I wished she just gave me permission to have a friend as I really do not want a divorce and all that it entails. As a man I think of sex everyday. Many have said you can have sex with her, but I believe she will be like a cold fish. I have been tested for all STD's and have negative results. My spouse says that the herpes is a result of her previous partners, over 28 years ago. Apparently this is something that can stay dormant for that period of time. Sometimes I do not believe that but I cannot find a medical person who knows or is willing to weigh in on it.

harriet

you may have herpes already and not know it ,into a long time before you know you have it. some times you could see it with in minutes or years ... i didn't know i had it into 5 years later.. when my wife went to check her self. little bumps and burns and itich " don't touch you eyes,or you could get it in your eyes or mouth.." wash your hands evertime you used the restroom. Over time i wanted to die, (depresion) but i learn how to deal with it.. thank your wife for tell you, i learn the hard way,,. if any body has a std let the partner know... My wife still love me ,we just watch out for brake outs. wash up after, it helps i haven't have any break outs after i wash up.

Sadly I am doing the same

Sadly I am doing the same thing to my wife. I love her but don't seem to be interested in sex with her. I'm not interested in trying a different woman for sex. But I suspect that given a new female to play with, my libido would awaken, at least for a while. One of the problems of being a male is that if you are not aroused, you can’t fake it. For that reason, I choose to not try with her, as a limp dick would upset both of us more than not having sex at all. Perhaps just hugging and loving can be enough.

I have given my husband

I have given my husband permission to do anything with anyone he wants, hoping that will get him interested. He refuses, knowing he would not be able to get a girlfriend. I wish he would. If he could do it with anyone, I would be pleased for him. I personally think if you men have no intention of being able to have sex with your wives you should divorce them so they can move on and find someone. You are very selfish to stay with them.

no sex

I just want to add. Neither of us has herpes, he just has not had sex with me for almost 27 years. I laugh when they do std tests on me. I tell the dr. that is a waste of money due to needing to have sex to transmit a disease.

i am really having problem not having sex at 62. it been4 years

I THINK I amm still attracted and sexity.my husband of 38 years has lost all desire,even just to touch or pat. he has some medical problems but too much ego to seek real help. I TO THE point of one night stand with someonen i can trust.I GET ALL KINDS OF attention from other men. I EVEN TRIED PUTTING VIAGO INHIS COFFEE LIKE 6 PER CUP. NOTHING HAPPEN MADE HIM SLEEP BETTER

PLEASE COME TO INDONESIA

PLEASE COME TO INDONESIA (BALI ).I,AM HIPER SEX MAN..PLEASE

i can help u if u want

i am from india and if u want i can help u, just msg me ur details and your problem in detaile on my mail id megh.meghani@yahoo.com or u cann also call me up on 91 993o213125

No sex for 4 years

I too have a partner that's lost interest in sex of any kind. She had a prolapse operation 4 years ago that tilted her entry and narrowed it to a point that it's too painful to have sex. We did experiment with me giving her oral sex but she didn't respond and achieve a orgasum as she used too.
Our bed now seems like wide ocean with us sleeping on opposite sides of that ocean. I have visited sites looking for women to share this and there is plenty of sites that seem to use the misery of people like us for their own selfish gain
Thank you for sharing your story and thanks to this forum for me to be able to vent my story

Sex in Later years

I'm 76 and have sex once to twice a week with an 80 year old woman. She enjoys the hell out of it and wants it more frequently than I.

Let me help you with our mutual problem

I too am in a very long term relationship with my wife who has also lost all interest in sex. If I manage to get her to "GIVE IN" and join me for a romp in the sack, for the next several weeks, she manages to avoid intimate contact. She acts like she is afraid that any kind of warmth between us will likely lead to me wanting sex. In reality, I still want to have sex EVERY DAY but to do that, I would need to have a willing companion. I am almost at my wits end in sexual frustration. No manner of seduction seems to work for any period of time. We are blessed to have a private, Jacuzzi Hot Tub Spa in the rear yard of mountain top home, near Los Angeles. In the evenings is the best time to go to the hot tub because it is so sensual, intimate and fun. My wife will no longer join me in the spa and gives all sorts of phony excuses to avoid making intimate connections that would surely come to pass if we were both luxuriously soaking in the bubbles of the Jacuzzi. As a result, I must go there alone. How I wish that I had a female friend to come over and visit with me on these lonely evenings. I have talked with my wife about such an idea and she is agreeable to the idea. If you are an older woman who is reading this blog for your own personal reasons, I welcome you to contact me here in Los Angeles. Maybe we will find that we have more in common between us, than merely enjoying the same blog. Feel free to send me an email so that we can communicate more directly. I'd really like to hear from you! - Bill - From West LA at Yahoo dot Com - (no spaces & no dashes)

Message for Bill Shorter

Bill. I am a woman in a very similar situation to yours. I would love the chance to communicate with you directly & explore common interests. Please email me
on charlottewilliams481@yahoo.co.uk I would email you but the address is unclear on the blog.

Message for Bill Shorter

Bill. I am a woman in a very similar situation to yours. I would love the chance to communicate with you directly & explore common interests. Please email me
on charlottewilliams481@yahoo.co.uk I would email you but the address is unclear on the blog.

Message for Bill Shorter

Bill. I am a woman in a very similar situation to yours. I would love the chance to communicate with you directly & explore common interests. Please email me
on charlottewilliams481@yahoo.co.uk I would email you but the address is unclear on the blog.

Harriet

I wish you were my neighbor.
Jim

this caster dr.marnish is real

I must admit, this caster dr.marnish is real. i called dr.marnish +15036626930 when my boyfriend departed from me. but since my boyfriend came back I definitely believe dr.marnish@yahoo.com is real

i want sex a lot to im 78 an still hard right now

talk to me i have a nabor shes 74 cant get enough she very hot to we fuck a lot to

To Harriet

I am 60 and single and am just as desirous as I was at 20. Have you considered self pleasuring? Hopefully so. Read Betty Dodson's book Sex for One. You can purchase it on Amazon. It will be very helpful I am sure as there are lots of good ideas for toys, fantasy, and other kinds of pleasures.
Wou;d your husband consider being open to you having a lover or maybe inviting someone to bed with the both of you?
I have a much more varied sex life than I ever have at me age.
Life and sex are not over, In some ways they have just begun.

I'ld like to meet

I too am now over 60 and if you're living in the Los Angeles area as I am, I would really like to meet and greet you sometime. Since you ARE over 60, I hope that you are not afraid of the dark....if you know what I mean. :>) - Bill

I am 63. My boyfriend is 10

I am 63. My boyfriend is 10 years younger than I. After not being sexually active for a few years, I thought I was dead inside. He awakened things in me I never knew existed. Personally, he has admitted to me that my sex drive is higher than his. Loving it.

Dr Wexler, You have a very

Dr Wexler, You have a very positive message for the 'experienced' population: Vitality shall know no age when meaning is present.

You ROCK Doc!!

Sincerely, Lisa lawn

Sex after 60

Because of fear in my earlier years and because I was never comfortable with the guys I dated, along with my up bringing, I have never had intercourse. I have done other sexual things just not that. I have felt very inferior and not at all normal even though it was my choice. I am regretting it now. I feel like a freek. Is it to late.

Until you're dead it is never too late to have sex

There are a lot of people who mistakenly think that their sex life must end at a certain age. They seem to think that if they have not yet tried THIS or THAT then now that we are in our 50's or 60's or 70's etc., it must be too late. I strongly believe that as long as you have breath, you have lift. As long as you have life, there is absolutely no reason for you to truncate your sexual activities, unless there are health reasons, (IE) a bad heart. Even if you do you have a bum ticker, I'd still do it but just make sure you take an aspirin as a form of heart insurance. :>)

Until you're dead it is never too late to have sex

There are a lot of people who mistakenly think that their sex life must end at a certain age. They seem to think that if they have not yet tried THIS or THAT then now that we are in our 50's or 60's or 70's etc., it must be too late. I strongly believe that as long as you have breath, you have lift. As long as you have life, there is absolutely no reason for you to truncate your sexual activities, unless there are health reasons, (IE) a bad heart. Even if you do you have a bum ticker, I'd still do it but just make sure you take an aspirin as a form of heart insurance. :>)

Never got enough - now I can get nothing!

I've crossed the chronological threshold of 60 and now find that nobody will sleep with me. Not that they ever really wanted to, though they said our sex was good. It's the only thing that was really meaningful to me - I have my millions and nobody to spend them on, nor anyone young enough to want that would sleep with me - even for money. I spend each day creating value I have no use for, yet wonder why I'm even alive. Yes, I have kids, but they are just kids, not a bedmate. For me, sex is a soft, loving merging of two bodies and souls into one - without which life has never been worth living, but now even the fragmented sex life I used to have is gone. Any and all suggestions are really appreciated. I have seen many counselors, coaches and "the-rapists", but to no avail other than wasting money.

Quite honestly, I'd advertise for a bedmate but all I get is spam. Women today seem to just want "fun", and need nothing. I'd hire a hooker, but I could only pay for a few days or weeks of a full time partner. Then all hope would be lost.

sex

Send me an e mail and all ur problems are over.

Ageless mind

You wondered why you are alive? You have plenty live for..

Sex is just one aspect of spiritual connection, and your take on oneness is respectable and similar to mine..
Age shouldn't be a factor at all. Are you confident? A good listener?
Perhaps I could help you rejuvenate your mojo(if you haven't by now)...or just be a penpal.

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Harry K. Wexler, Ph.D. is a research and clinical psychologist and the director of the Center for Aging Sexuality and Meaning in New York City and Laguna Beach.

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