I think it's really great to adopt a philosophy of "sometimes closing our eyes and sometimes opening it"...I would also like to share that for each of us, depending on our past experiences and upbringing, etc., love mean different things. I'll give you an example that changes my perspective and experience of love:
My mother fell in love with this wonderful man at the age of 16, although their love was never consummated and their paths were crossed later in life, they were very much in love and kept missing opportunities to meaningfully connect due to strange and bizarre life circumstances... after almost over 65 years (he passed away 20 years ago) my mother still talks about him...losing him to life's destiny has been the most traumatic experience of her life, and trust me her life hasn't been easy, he also loved her very much...they remained good acquaintances who missed the opportunity to be with each other (topic for a good movie or book potentially!)...case in point, their love became the epitome of what love means to me and my other siblings in a way...I realized this a few years ago and was shocked to learn that most of my teenage and early adulthood had been spent looking for an experience like hers, "suffering" equaled love, and if the person was available to me then I would dismiss him as "not the one" as I grew up and entered my 30's then I had a eureka moment that love didn't have to hurt, that a nice kind and gentle emotion, a sense of caring for another could also qualify as love, so I don't have to keep searching to experience her hurts, and then triumph over it, that battle is over now, I don't have to win it for her!

We could gain insight into how we come to associate certain emotions with love, and then shed those that aren't ours or get to the root of where they come from possibly...I believe in the notion that "we all go back home" one way or the other! We could creat a space to redfine what it means to us, hopefull before it's not too late to then go out there and test the theory ;)

what wise words - and such a good comment too!
To investigate ones images of what love should be is definately a good but also painful process to go through.
I'm in it right now wondering if my feelings for a very good friend and colleague that not (yet)is a lover is more the kind of love that I really need deep inside, or if I should stay with my husband which I also care a lot for - but is it love?
With my friend it's all about speeking nice words, sharing feelings and thoughts and behaving very supportive emotionally to each other, with my husband - its more the stable but not very emotionally expressive relationship. He is not a man of words, and somewhat rigid (perfectionist architect) but has beautiful hands, good at physical lovemaking and is a very fine father of my children. My husband I realise, has filled in the emotional gap for me that a very distant father left - my father was a very fine lover for my mother but not very much there for the children, a businessman that travelled the world, and when he was home he was very socially active so the time left for us children was very scarce...
Well I have patience, I think to wait and see what my feelings really tell me to do... And in the mean time my colleague friend remains a friend - though I maybe, inspired by the article shoul reveal a little more of my feelings for him. Than you for the inspiration!

People can benefit from gaining a better understanding of their own emotions. Sometimes it probably is better to just express feelings too. The author is so right about that.

Experience has taught me that repressing emotions sometimes stands in the way of making logical decisions for myself or others. Maybe everyone experiences that problem occasionaly. But, maybe some feelings are better left repressed. How can they benefit you if dredging them up leaves you quite literally vulnerable?