Chicago group to host adult sibling conference Nov. 15

Chicago-based Supporting Illinois Brothers and Sisters (SIBS) will host a one-day conference for siblings of adults with disabilities on Nov. 15 at College of DuPage in Glen Ellyn, Illinois.

The event, called "Supporting Siblings of People with Disabilities: The Forgotten Family Members," will be co-sponsored by The ARC of Illinois.

Speakers will address a range of topics, including research about siblings' experiences, national and regional resources for brothers and sisters, personal stories, and siblings' self-advocacy efforts.

SIBS aims to support Illinois residents who have siblings with special needs, including developmental disabilities, chronic illnesses, and mental health issues. On its website, the organization identifies the difficulties that children of siblings with disabilities can have, but also zeroes in on the key issues that come up in adulthood: "The single biggest issue for young siblings is not getting enough attention from their parents. For adult siblings the biggest issue is worrying about the future."

SIBS cofounder Nora Fox Handler is keenly aware of the need to plan for the future. Handler, who has three brothers with disabilities, said she helped start SIBS because her own family went through such a difficult transition upon her mother's death.

"If we had found this before she passed away, the entire trajectory of our lives would have been different and easier," she said. Lacking support and information, Handler and her sisters struggled to organize housing for their brothers at serious personal and financial costs. "We call it the How-not-to-do-it Story," she said.

Handler will co-present at the conference with her brother, Martin Fox, about self-advocacy. She said helping siblings take on the role of self-advocacy, "makes their lives fuller and makes our lives easier."

Siblings, family members and professionals serving adults with disabilities are invited, and continuing education credits are available. Handler urges professionals to come as they are often the first point of contact for brothers and sisters when parents pass away and can ease the transition process.

When I asked Handler, who I met at the International Sibling Conference this year, why she would encourage siblings to come - especially those who have not met other brothers and sisters before - she turned the question back on me. "How can you describe what it feels like to find other people who instantly get it?" she asked.

The answer is that it feels like you are at family reunion with a bunch of people you just met, and for once you don't have to struggle to explain yourself.

For more information about the event, visit the websites of Supporting Illinois Brothers and Sisters and The ARC of Illinois.