Procrastination: I Can Get by With Help From My Friends

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I’m an expert on procrastination, but somehow I recently found myself stuck in a state of mental freeze. Family issues and too many commitments were preoccupying my mind and energy, and prevented me from working. The work really began to pile up. Despite everything I’ve read, written and know, I just couldn’t kick myself into gear.

I talked with a friend who also deals with executive function challenges (a fancier name for procrastination and problems like organizing and focus) and he had run into the same dilemma. Structure is a friend, and outside structure is sometimes what it takes. I got through my dissertation by having an advisor who gave me a goal for each week and meeting with him weekly.

My friend recommended getting an executive function coach. He recommended Kathy Peterson, so I emailed her (rather sheepishly) to say I knew exactly what to do, but just couldn’t seem to do it. I’m happy to report a great outcome. Why, you might ask?

First, Kathy provided that outside push I needed. We would review what I needed to do, prioritize, estimate time and write it hour by hour into my calendar. She made sure I didn’t put down more than I was likely to do (one of the problems was that I was already pretty burned out). She had check-ins during the week to see if I was on track.

Second, Kathy had a fresh set of eyes to recognize emotional issues connected with the work. These issues got in the way because I wasn’t in touch with them. (Yes, therapists aren’t always in touch with all their feelings, just like everyone else.)

And a big third, Kathy was my cheerleader. Instead of my relentless self-criticism, she was encouraging and validating. If I slipped up and didn’t get my work done, it wasn’t the end of the world or the end of working. There was always a fresh tomorrow and it was OK to take a needed break.

So, dear fellow procrastinators who read this, it’s not a moral failing if you’ve procrastinated by reading articles on procrastination. Structure is your friend, and outside structure and encouragement can be a better friend when you need it. I’ve kicked back into gear and I’m working on my own, but it is OK and advisable to know yourself, what you need, and use it. If you wear glasses and need them, they’re not a crutch; they’re just what you have to have. If you need outside support, go for it.