Your Zesty Self

New perspectives on freeing yourself from shame and building self-esteem.

Jane Bolton, Psy.D., M.F.T., is a supervising and training analyst and adjunct professor at the Institute of Contemporary Psychoanalysis in Los Angeles. See full bio

Your Zesty Self

February 4, 2010

The Other Three Magic Words for Relationships and Self-Esteem

Relational harmony increases self-esteem and lowers anxiety. These three words are even more effective for creating that harmony and therefore lowering anxiety.

December 29, 2009

Defuse Holiday Conflicts: How To Mirror

Wanna Fight? NO? Then Mirror Read More

December 22, 2009

Defuse Holiday Conflicts with the Gift of Mirroring

You can count on pain and conflict if you don't know how to mirror. Read More

November 22, 2009

How Reality Checking Can Save Your Life and Your Dreams

Never again would I not ask about what kind of a relationship another person wants before I actually entered one. I had learned the painful results of not doing a reality check. Read More

October 29, 2009

Raise Your Self Esteem by Getting Unglued from Your Stuck Feelings

Find peace from troublesome feelings and increase harmony in your relationships by using this awesome Conscious Witness perspective on yourself Read More

October 8, 2009

7 More Reasons It's So Darn Hard To Earn The Empathy Gold Cup

Why don't people just learn empathy and stop fighting? Read More

September 18, 2009

Stop Giving Me Empathy! It Makes Me Feel Bad

So you think everybody always wants understanding? Do you have any of these barriers to recieving empathy. Read More

August 31, 2009

Raise Self Esteem with the Lifeblood of Empathy

I call empathy lifeblood, because it gives us vitality. After all, a basic everyday, all day human need is to be seen, heard and recognized for who we are. Not for how someone would like us to be. Not for how someone is trying to get us to be. But for who we are inside: Our feelings, thoughts, desires, and dreams. Read More

August 11, 2009

Is Anger Good or Bad For Self Esteem?

"Pushing, Shouting, Shoving in Tampa Town Hall" and "Town Hall Free-For-Alls: Screaming and Chaos" cry TV headlines as healthcare reform is debated. We see enraged and truly terrified people screaming in turbulent gatherings. Read More

July 21, 2009

Your Most Powerful Self-Esteem Lifter is You

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." —Eleanor Roosevelt

"You're not the boss of me!" asserts the three-year-old, rebelling against parental limit setting. When it comes to regulating our self esteem, we should all be so three-years-old, refusing to give that power away. Read More

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How early life experiences shape our character.

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