When I was a teenager, I couldn't leave the house without my mother calling out, "Be careful."
In time, I learned to see the world as sort of scary and often wondered if that guy walking toward me on the street was going to hurt me. I learned to be ever-vigilant in surveying my surroundings. It was a mindset that affected decisions I made about where I went and what I did - including passing on some opportunities that deep down, I really wanted to pursue.
In my work around body image, I talk with many women and girls about how they feel about their bodies - and the experiences that shape those feelings. Unfortunately, sexual and domestic violence are too often a part of those stories.
Tonight, I watched a PBS NewsHour special program that focused on violence against women in Guatemala. In this clip, reporter Ray Suarez references Guatemala's "frightening levels of violence against women and girls," as well as the country's high fertility rates that often lead to "six to 10 pregnancies" for an average woman (The second half of Suarez's piece, which focuses on family planning, will air tonight).
Most disturbing to me was Suarez's description of the country's "culture of cruelty" - one in which men rely on the shame of young women and their families to protect themselves from any legal ramifications of their violent crimes. According to Suarez, it's not uncommon for a rape victim to see her attacker on the street.
While rape itself is a hideous crime, there's another crime here as well: Society's tolerance of violence against half its citizens, simply because of their gender. In Congo, women's bodies are used as weapons through which rebels seek to terrorize and control by raping women - often in front of their children and husbands, according to Reuters.
Here in the U.S., we're seeing a shift toward increasing limitations on a woman's right to control her own body at the same time that we're seeing cuts to programs that focus on family planning and women and children's health. These kinds of cultural changes have a trickle-down effect on the way women and girls feel about themselves and their bodies.
How do I help my daughter see the world as a safe place - one in which she can go about the business of pursuing her goals and dreams without fear? How do I teach her to be an advocate for her own health when her body is a subject of political debate? And how do I teach her to focus on what really matters when there are so many forces trying to distract her with questions about whether she's good enough, pretty enough or sexy enough?
We must speak out for those who can't, and be ever-watchful in guarding against forces that threaten to make it tolerable for women's bodies to be used as weapons - in any way.
