Perhaps you're wondering what Breast Cancer Awareness Month has to do with you?
Well, I ask you simply, "What does this month not have to do with you?"
We are living in an age where it may be our neighbor, our mother, our child's teacher, a dear friend or relative that is indirectly or directly affected by this disease. In 2011 alone, 230,480 new cases of invasive breast cancer will be diagnosed in US women.
BC doesn't discriminate. The biggest risk factors are being a woman and getting older. Two things you can't do a thing about!
In fact, just today E!'s Guiliana Rancic announced she has BC - at age 36.
Simply put, we are all affected by this disease- whether it is through personal experience, or witnessing the debilitating effects that it has with on a loved one, the actions necessary to combat breast cancer are essential.
First, know that you can do something. I know from personal experience, as the daughter of a Breast Cancer Fighter that how I react to the disease- even when not battling it myself- is so crucial to the journey of survival.
Can you imagine that? Your, my, our reaction to the diagnosis of a relative or friend, a coworker or mate, is critical in how they react to the disease. How we see them, how we treat the entire prognosis, the multiple doctor's visits, the onslaught of treatments that seem inhumanly possible to endure, matters.
It's all about the ATTITUDE.
We all need to constantly be thinking, changing and making incredibly certain that during this month of awareness, our entire beings are encouraging and saying to those who depend on the support:
"Listen up STRONG, BEAUTIFUL WOMAN! You CAN do this. You WILL do this. And I am here for you."
And, never underestimate the effectiveness of a rousing, "Cancer SUCKS!". Yes, I said it. If there is one thing a cancer fighter like my mother hates, its when people cheer her on as if she is running a marathon by choice. There is no choice when it comes to cancer. It strikes at will, and that kind of uncertainty totally sucks. No other way to describe it.
Our non-verbal efforts in showing our support must be clearly aligned with the positive messages that we are saying. Be careful not to give conflicting messages—they will be picked up on.
Remember the negative doctor's experience that I talked about over at Doctor Oz a while back on the importance of improving doctor - patient communication?
If not, go ahead—I'll wait.
In this post, I discussed the importance of a physician's body language when it comes to encouraging or discouraging their patients. My own family had quite the experience with a doctor who did not pay much attention to their body language when my mother was first diagnosed with Breast Cancer.
We were reeling from a diagnosis that seemingly came out of nowhere. We thought my mother was going to die. And the doctor did very little to alleviate that pain, or even present a positive outlook on the prognosis and journey my mother was getting ready to embark upon. When her cancer spread from her breasts to her liver - two highly regarded Boston physicians both told us that the only thing to do was keep the cancer from growing. Not get rid of it. Not eradicate it from her body. No miracles allowed - just management. What about hope?
Of course, doctors are not meant to sugarcoat treatments, prognosis or other serious matters.
Yet, the human spirit can be deflated when the situation is devoid of hope. Or seemingly so. And I hate to say it, but it ain't over till the fat lady sings—I believe that in every situation there is HOPE.
Hope is a gift you give to those you love. Or those who have taken an oath to care for.
There are doctors in this world who view hope and attitude as critical components to recovery.
One of these doctors is Dr. Mehmet Oz, of The Doctor Oz Show. Last spring, reeling from the news that my mother's cancer had returned, I found myself chatting with Dr. Oz after filming a segment for his show. I asked him, if it were his wife facing BC - where would he turn?
Without hesitation, he pointed me in the direction of the man who is saving my mother's life- Dr. Mitch Gaynor of NYC. Our initial consultation included TWO HOURS of discussion - he asked about her childhood, her family origins, her total life's journey. Dr. Gaynor knows that valuable information is contained in these conversations - he may stumble across a tidbit that other doctors dismissed - but that he knows may save her life.
The manner in which we look at our loved one; the manner in which we hug, the way in which we take an inventory of how they might be feeling, and how we should be giving unto them, can be and will be wrapped up and delivered through our physical and bodily communication.
I know that's challenging: the idea of stepping outside of ourselves, at the moment of learning of your loved one's diagnosis. Think, kindly, how sensitive a time it will be for everyone involved—directly or indirectly—and understand the value of your body language.
One of the unknowns that continually baffles otherwise great physicians, is the power of a touch, a kiss, the mere presence of another to an occupied hospital bed. The evidence speaks loudly. For example, after being shot, and seeing only the dimmest signs of recovery, Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords felt the touch of her husband, the presence of bodies and people that she loved; and she began slowly, steadily improving.
Simply put, I am encouraging you to not forsake the power of your touch, of your presence, of your smile. Especially when it seems as though hope may be all you have left.
During Breast Cancer Awareness Month, take into account how you can help beat this disease. It will amaze you at how effective and powerful your body language is in communicating even the simplest of messages.
