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Body Language
Lessons in Communication
What can we learn from MLK about interpreting the ody language of others?
Posted August 22, 2011
Today, as the new Martin Luther King Jr. memorial is unveiled in Washington DC - just a stone's throw from where I sit writing this - I am humbled by the memory of MLK, one of the most powerful communicators in history.
I make a living as a communication expert - so you'd better believe that I have studied MLK like no other. I needn't remind you of his powerful voice, the trembling inflection that shook with passion or the words he used to invoke emotion into the hearts, minds and souls of those around him.
No, there is truly no doubt as to the man's oratory abilities.
History, the American people and millions of YouTube hits (on a 48 year old clip) cannot be wrong.
No - Martin Luther King, Jr. was as revered then and now as the moral leader of America. Decades after his death, we still try to live up to the prescription for our future that he so eloquently stated in his "I Have a Dream" speech.
As one of the most pivotal moments in the history of this country, August 28, 1963 will live in our collective history as a moment of rebirth for America. It is a message that made believers out of naysayers, made an entire country hunger for societal change and laid the foundation for groundbreaking improvements in our culture.
What's interesting is this: if we were to simply judge a book by its cover - and evaluate MLK's message strictly on the basis of his body language - we may have had a completely different takeaway that August afternoon.
This is something that I repeatedly speak about in my workshops. I use this example pretty much across the board to convey the importance of establishing a baseline - gathering information about an individual's normal patterns of behavior.
Evaluating and understanding baseline is so critical when it comes to interpreting communication that when done incorrectly - it means the difference between iconic moments in your life or the failure that comes with misinterpretation.
Take a peek at the great speech for a second and see if you can spot what I mean: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwoAn-FcxFw
Now - go back and watch again. Only this time - turn the sound off.
Did you notice that the entire time MLK is giving his gloriously uplifting speech - his head is shaking side to side in a "No" pattern?
Commonly, this misstep is used to identify an individual who is being...well, less than honest. If this is the case, that shaking the head "no" while issuing forth a "yes" statement means that the person is lying?
Using these guidelines, MLK didn't really "have a dream", doesn't believe that all men are entitled to "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness," and probably doesn't give a hoot about the "unalienable rights" of his fellow citizens?
Nope. Wrong. Uh-uh.
What it means is this: body language means nothing without a baseline.
Given what we know about MLK, and having studied other clips of him speaking - we can establish a baseline relatively quickly, the same as you can do with any person you come into contact with. For instance, we know that King was a preacher - and how many times have you witnesses your priest, pastor or rabbi give an impassioned message? Especially to those of you located in the Southern part of the US - you know exactly what I mean. That type of speech on Sunday, usually accompanied by the head shaking "no" - it is de regular on pulpits from sea to shining sea.
Additionally, as a pastor and public speaker - MLK would have to have been an extremely auditory person. Meaning that feeling and thought are closely tied to his hearing. He would have been an auditory learner and participator, rather than an individual who used his eyes to survey a crowd - he would use his ears (this is also evidenced by the amount of time he spends looking down). The nearly continual movement of the head is indicative of individuals who are using their hearing to gauge the world around them.
Without establishing a baseline for MLK - or anyone else - you leave yourself highly open to misconception.
Of course, I will be the first to tell you that body language has a tremendous impact on the value and interpretation of your message. However, don't be blinded by the knowledge you have of non-verbal communication and miss the powerful spoken cues right in front of you. Communication works as an entire package - words and actions go hand in hand - otherwise we could have stopped evolving eons ago and saved our breath.
Just another lesson we can learn from the late, great Martin Luther King, Jr.
Janine Driver is the NY Times Bestselling author of You Say More Than You Think: A 7-Day Plan for Using the New Body Language to Get What You Want. For more information, visit www.lyintamer.com.
