What skeletons are in your closet? Photo:closetfactory.com
Do as I say, not as I do! This refrain is becoming part of the script for every moralizing leader in our society. The latest stanza in this refrain comes from the New Jersey Reverend Cedric Miller. Miller leapt to fame last week, when he began sermonizing on the dangers that Facebook posed to marriages, and the risk of infidelity that the social networking site brought into the marital bed. But, as almost anyone could have predicted at this point, this man's passion about infidelity didn't stop at online concerns. Turns out, he had encouraged his own wife to be unfaithful in the past, watching and participating as his wife had sex with one of his married male assistants, often with the participation and permission of that man's wife! Maybe it was okay since they didn't arrange their orgies on Facebook? (Can you do that anyway? I always get invites to various events via Facebook - never an orgy though - maybe I go to the wrong church?)
The tune of this song is getting a bit repetitious, don't you think? Senator John Ensign railed against Clinton's moral failings, reflected in the President's infidelity. But Ensign has now been exposed in his own sordid scandal, allegedly paying off the husband of his former mistress, to try to keep the story under wraps. Newt Gingrich also lambasted Clinton's infidelity, conveniently forgetting his own history of extramarital sex. Mark Foley railed against child pornography, and sent dirty text messages to underage kids. Colorado minister Ted Haggard was fired up against homosexuality, until it was revealed that methamphetamine and hot gay sex apparently were two key ingredients to getting him hot and bothered. The list goes on and on.
In psychology, it's generally understood that the field of research or therapy chosen by clinicians and researchers often serves as a projective inkblot-esque shadow of the psychologist's past, interests, or proclivities. Someone studies and writes about alcohol or drugs, it's assumed they have their own history, either using, or being exposed to it. Study or treat sexuality, as I do, and it's assumed that you've got some naked skeletons, doing the nasty in the closet of your research lab. The concept is an example of various psychological mechanisms, whereby people either project their own internal fears and struggles onto others, OR they try to fix their own past, gaining some sense of control, by changing the future.
Perhaps instead of protest signs, we should be taking large mirrors and fake Halloween skeletons to these leader's speeches. Let's hold up the mirrors, to remind them who they're really talking about, when they rail against deception, moral failings and sexual excess. Make the skeletons dance, to let our leaders know that we're not stupid. They have secrets in their closets, just like we do. Perhaps our leaders should remember that when they stand up in front of us, that their closet doors might very well turn to glass.
Do a closet/skeleton inventory, before you start a moral campaign.
