Women and Happiness

I'm sorry about your aunt. How sad. Mostly fo her,but for you, too. You are a great person who has helped so many people you don't even know. I know you don't need anyone to tell you not to let it get you down, but don't.

It's as if the light and dark find balance in our lives, given your granny and aunt's influences respectively. I had an aunt just like her, although yours sounds more honest. Perhaps better than the sweet and subtle undermining approach...where they find ways to point out how irresponsible you are for not doing things their way...which means forget personal fulfillment if it is not the sure fire way to practical ends or subservience to the family good...usually if it's a woman...but either way.. we have to choose our own outlook. Your Granny is an inspiring class act...and the courage to be happy is one goal we should all go for. You remind me of that today...

My great-grandmother was like that... just a very unhappy person.

As every waitress can tell you, so often when people are awful to us, it has nothing to do with us and everything to do with them being miserable in general. Nothing you can do will please these people, so the best course of action is to just smile sweetly and ignore them (and possibly give them the finger when they aren't looking).

Hi,

interesting thoughts. I completely agree. Happiness is a tricky word. I had a shot at trying to define it in a more "scientific" or "objective" way, despite it being a subjective feeling:
What is happiness?

I would love to hear your thoughts!

Thank you,

Nick

I am sorry to hear of your great aunt's resentment. I am so glad you had your grandmother's beautiful example. Carrying around anger and resentment will never make a person happy. Spreading generosity around is a much better way to live your life. Be happy!

I just pre-ordered the new book Bluebird: Women and the New Psychology of Happiness - I am so, well, HAPPY, to see this subject in print from YOU! I have chosen to be happy and its a bucket of work sometimes, but so much easier and fun. I had a run in with one of those truly unhappy people recently....she didn't approve of the noise my 3 year old twins were making at my parents country club while we used the potty. She was spewing anger at me while we washed or hands and prepared to go and meet Santa Claus. Her friend was mortified. I just told her Happy Holidays and went on my way. What a world that poor soul lives in. Can't wait for the book! Great article - THANKS!

I love the message your grandmother left on your answering machine. I may have to steal her line and use it. Her sister was jealous of her light, and yours.