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Think Confident, Be Confident

Cognitive Therapy techniques for eliminating doubt and achieving lifelong self-esteem.

by Marci Fox, Ph.D. and Leslie Sokol, Ph.D.

Marci Fox, a licensed psychologist, is the co-author of Think Confident, Be Confident. See full bio

July 30, 2009, Self-Help

Is Too Much Enthusiasm A Bad Thing?

Can there be too much enthusiasm?

By Marci Fox, Ph.D. and Leslie Sokol, Ph.D.

Imagine having faced a situation that elicited an abundance of enthusiasm. Being single for a long time and finally meeting someone who you could imagine spending every second with. Imagine finding a job that is everything you have been looking for plus a big paycheck. You are excited and want to jump into these situations without any brakes. Is that a good idea? The answer is yes!

Embracing a new opportunity with every ounce of enthusiasm you have can have many advantages. One, it presents an opportunity for pleasure allowing natural endorphins to provide you with a healthy buzz. Two, it promotes optimism which is the best antidote to almost everything. Third, it helps you live in the moment so you are able to appreciate and fully participate in the present. Fourth, it provides you an opportunity to savor your good fortune so that in less fortunate times you can recall this great moment. For all of these reasons, learn to embrace your good fortune, face it with enthusiasm, and give it all that you've got!

Is there a down side? A patient told me that he feared that if he was "Too Gung Ho" then disappointment may result. The reality is that any situation may not turn out to be what you had hoped for. You may be disappointed, but is the upset any less if you were less enthusiastic? Disappointment is disappointment regardless of how intense; it is still an unpleasant feeling. Remember we have all faced disappointment and although we wish we could avoid it, we can't. But, disappointment is nothing to fear. It is a short-term unpleasant emotion that will fade with time. Don't let that fear get in your way of grasping the positive opportunities that present themselves. Embrace the good fortune you have, store the memory, relive it, and know whatever happens nothing can take away that experience. For that, is a necessary building block to sustainable confidence.