Think Confident, Be Confident

Cognitive Therapy techniques for eliminating doubt and achieving lifelong self-esteem.

by Marci Fox, Ph.D. and Leslie Sokol, Ph.D.

Why Exercise is a Life Skill

The act of exercising can be a microcosm for everything you tackle in life. Participating in exercise, whether it is a formal class in a gym, using fitness equipment, participating in a sport or active hobby, walking, taking on nature, running steps, or any physical effort, involves, commitment, effort, perseverance, and follow-through. Read More

Don't Yield to Holiday Over-Indulgence

Whether you have been working at weight loss, weight maintenance, or simply eating healthier, it's easy to yield to temptation and eat unhealthy and in excess during the holiday season. It's possible to partake in all the holiday fun without compromising your waistline or goals. Here are a few tips to not let the holidays lure you onto a path that compromises your objective. Read More

Go for your goals and gain confidence

Reaching for goals is an important part of strengthening self-confidence. It helps shape and update how you define yourself while at the same time helping you add to your sense of accomplishment. Here are some key tips to remember. Read More

Think Before You React

With so many ways to have instant access to another person, it's so important for each of us to think before we immediately react by thinking through the various possible intended and unintended consequences of your actions. Your thinking impacts your anger, upset, or fear and colors how you see your situation. Read More

Is There a Difference Between Confidence and Cockiness?

Many people are afraid that if they embrace their confidence that they will come off as cocky. That's just not true. Confidence comes from believing in yourself and having the skills to back it. It's seeing yourself in a realistic way and recognizing the strengths, assets, smarts, and resources that you bring to any situation. Read More

Stress Free Dating Equals Fun

Dating is an opportunity to connect with other people. Why connect? Think of it as a time you can put your "to do" list aside and take a break. See it as a chance to go somewhere you've wanted to check out or a means to get some fresh air and sunshine. It can be a break from your routine and add some excitement into your day. Read More

Give up Worry by Recognizing it as a Bad Habit

Worry is made up of nagging, persistent thoughts that circle around in your head. It is "what if" statements, worst-case scenarios, and awful predictions. The act of worrying is an obsessive, habitual behavior-and one that you can give up. Here are 9 tips to help you put up boundaries around your worry. Read More

Don't Let Bad Drivers Ruin Your Day

Are you bothered by the driver that dangerously cuts you off, slams on their brakes without reason, drives slower or faster than the speed limit, runs the red light or slams on their brakes at the yellow, fails to turn right on red or left when the arrow is lit, does not go when the light turns green, or sways between lanes as they talk or text on their phone? The answer is of course you are. Your feelings of frustration, anger, fear or resentment are understandable. Your feelings are a warning signal that you are facing a difficult or dangerous situation and the facts are you are facing exactly that. Read More

20 Ways to Get the Job You Want

You can help make the job you want happen. The key is believing in you. Plant your feet firmly on the path to the job you desire. Take the time to free yourself of the shackles of doubt so you can see yourself in the most positive accurate way. Confidence is what allows you to see the asset you are. Read More

Chatroulette: Beware of Danger

There is a new spin on an old game, called Chatroulette. Young adults and teenagers enter a web site to randomly video chat with individuals as they pop up on the screen. Sometimes a black screen is seen as the person either has no camera or has chosen not to reveal themselves. Similarly, sometimes audio is unavailable and conversation is through text. Read More

Six Ways to Boost Your Self-Esteem

Has your self-esteem gone into hibernation with the bears or fallen by the wayside like the leaves on the trees? Before you let one more moment slip away, put the spring back into your step without waiting for the thaw. Whether your self-esteem is still going strong, fading, has disappeared all together, it makes sense for all us to nurture our confidence. Read More

Tips for Staying Confident Over the Holidays

Celebrate YOU this upcoming holiday season. Recognize that you are a desirable, capable individual. You are more important than the gift you bring or the meal you make. Mark this season down on your calendar as the time to update your confidence. Let go of the stress of expectations and treat it the same way you would other days of the year. Here are some tips to help: Read More

Don't Let Anyone Ruin Your Night

Do you ever say to yourself or hear others say, "He made me feel bad or he ruined my night"? If the answer is yes, then you are suffering needlessly from letting others dictate how you think, feel, and behave. The key is to take control of these areas and the best way to do that is to put yourself in charge of thinking about your thinking. Read More

The "I MATTER" Motto

Are you able to say, "I matter"? Try it. If you find yourself barraged with negative thoughts, then it's time to take action to take better care of you. In our fast paced, filled to the brim world we all embody multiple identities and numerous responsibilities. Now couple that with the pressures of stress and daily life tasks, and it's easy to see how we forget to take care of ourselves. Read More

Getting in Shape in Five Painless Steps

You want to get in shape but your buts, oh wells, maybe tomorrows and permission-giving avoidance thoughts keep getting in the way. You truly believe you want to walk a healthier path, but your body just isn't cooperating. The good news is: one, you are not alone and two, you can get your brain on board and get your body to cooperate. Follow the five steps below and you will be on your way. Read More

To Be or Not To Be Confident in Your Older Adolescent

Older teenagers can be a significant source of stress in many parents' lives. Some of this stress is warranted but a majority of this distress is self-imposed. Valid stress is when your child is behaving in ways that put him in danger or in harm's way. Realistic concern for your child in this situation is justified and appropriate action on your part is needed. Read More

Seven Simple Strategies to Effectively Attracting Others

The secret to attracting others is self-confidence and it starts by believing in you. Whether you are looking for romance or friendship doubt can divert you away from your goals. Doubt unfairly tells you negative messages that are untrue. Read More

Don't Be Afraid to Ask for Help

An elderly woman unfamiliar with Starbucks and her moderately mentally impaired son wait in line at Starbucks. The son starts barreling his mother with questions. Both are overwhelmed with the abundance of choices and appear baffled. The coffee barrista is inundated making drinks and the cashier can barely keep up with the traffic. Read More

When to Stop, Yield, or Go in Friendship

Confidence can come from all the different areas of your life, friendship included. That's why it's so important to routinely take an inventory of your friendships to make sure that each one is a healthy part of your life. So imagine yourself being at a traffic light. Read More

Is Too Much Enthusiasm A Bad Thing?

Imagine having faced a situation that elicited an abundance of enthusiasm. Being single for a long time and finally meeting someone who you could imagine spending every second with. Imagine finding a job that is everything you have been looking for plus a big paycheck. You are excited and want to jump into these situations without any brakes. Is that a good idea? The answer is yes! Read More

Don't Let Self-Doubt Get In Your Way

Self-doubt can cause you to get in your own way. Doubt can lead you to get defensive, take command of the conversation rather than making it reciprocal, or cause you to appear overly confident through over self-promotion as you start listing out all the wonderful things that you have been up to. Doubt can also steer you to make an excuse to leave or slowly shrink to the sides of the room. Read More

The Key to Confidence

Confidence is our greatest personal resource. With it, we can face any situation knowing we can handle it. Without it, we are destined to suffer. Without confidence any situation has the potential to be a threat. Think about having to do anything from the smallest task to the most complex job without confidence. You question your ability and stress constantly. Read More

Think Confident, Be Confident Bloggers

Marci Fox, a licensed psychologist and international speaker, is the co-author of Think Confident, Be Confident. She is an adjunct faculty member at the Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy.

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