The Sexual Continuum

Discussing all things related to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) health.

by Dr. Brian Mustanski

Video interview on coming out to parents

Video describes what to consider when coming out to parents

Published on April 12, 2010 by Brian Mustanski, Ph.D. in The Sexual Continuum

What are some things to consider before young people come out to their parents as gay, lesbian, or bisexual? I discuss this with Dr. Rich Savin-Williams in the attached video. He describes some of the good reasons to think about coming out, like sharing your authentic self with your family. He talks about how coming out is a process and not a single event. Dr. Savin-Williams suggests it might be helpful to "try out" the process first with someone else, like an older sibling, before telling parents. This also provides an opportunity to think through how parents might react and prepare for those possible reactions. He highlights the importance of youth thinking about safety and security before coming out to parents, but that violent reactions are increasingly rare. He concludes by reminding us that sometimes parents need time to come to understand their child's sexual orientation and their feelings may improve over time.

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Dr. Savin-Williams is professor and chair of Human Development at Cornell University. He has written seven books on adolescent development. The latest, The New Gay Teenager (Harvard University Press, 2005) received the 2005 Distinguished Book Award from the American Psychological Association Division 44. Dr. Savin-Williams is also a licensed clinical psychologist with a private practice specializing in identity, relationship, and family issues among sexual-minority young adults. He has served as an expert witness on same-sex marriage, gay adoption, and Boy Scout court cases and is on numerous professional review boards. He has served as a consultant for MTV, 20/20, the Oprah Winfrey Show, and CNN and his work has been cited in Newsweek, Time, Rolling Stone, Parent Magazine, New York Magazine, New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Washington Post, USA Today, and Chicago Sun Times.

Other videos and resources related to lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender health and development can be found on the webpage of the IMPACT Program at the University of Illinois at Chicago.

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Tags: american psychological association, bisexual, boy scout, chicago sun times, cnn, coming out, coming out to parents, cornell university, gay, gay adoption, gay teenager, harvard university press, impact program, lesbian, lgbt, licensed clinical psychologist, oprah winfrey, oprah winfrey show, parenting, same sex marriage, seven books, sexual minority, transgender health, university of illinois at chicago, usa today, violent reactions

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Brian Mustanski, Ph.D., is Associate Professor at Northwestern University and the founding Director of the IMPACT LGBT Health and Development Program.

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