The Mystery of Happiness

How to live a soulful and spiritual life.

Unholy Emotions Weaken Your Spirit

You are only hurting yourself with your anger. (Job 18:4)

The unholy emotions-anger, rage, hate-disturb the soul, damage the body, and harm relationships. This is why the bible tells us: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. (Eph. 4:26) The brief satisfaction you derive from discharging these toxic feelings is surpassed by the fact that these emotions pollute you and everyone around you. When you feel but do not express negative emotions, they will still leak out and cause damage. Like remnants of toxic materials that are buried deep in craters, these emotions remain dangerous. And no one escapes the harmful effects. The Bible warns us: An angry man stirs dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins. (Prov. 29:22)

However, toxic emotions, like nuclear materials, can be sources of energy if converted into a useful force. When you feel anger and hatred toward someone, take the following steps:

Face it. You are angry. Don't try to find a reason for it or explain it; don't look for a rationale and justification for it. Especially, don't seek revenge. That is God's privilege. The Bible says, Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay." (Rom. 12:19)

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Acknowledge that anger is an unholy feeling and contemplate God's Holy messages-love, care, and compassion. The Holy message is this: Love God and all his creatures, including the one who made you angry. The Bible praises the even-tempered: Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city. (Prov. 16:32).

Furthermore, if the goal of your anger is stopping someone's undesired behavior toward you, you'll be sorely disappointed. Negative emotions provoke similar reactions. The Bible says: A patient man calms a quarrel. (Prov. 15:18) It also warns, A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. (Prov. 15:1) Only love has transformative powers, and the holiest emotion-the love of God-is the ultimate transformer. "Love your enemies" means have no enemies. The universe is a hostile place for a pseudo-strong person but for the really strong person, a person strong in faith, it is a friendly place.

Thinking harshly of other people or talking critically about them only hurts you. The Bible tells us: Whatever you have said in the dark will be heard in the daylight. Whatever you have whispered in private rooms will be shouted from the housetops. (Luke 12:3) When you unleash feelings of hatred, envy, and anger they will directly or indirectly waste your own energy. The Bible urges us, Let's agree to use all our energy in getting along. (Rom. 14:19)

In some dark corner of your psyche the heat of negativism may seem satisfying, but if you allow it to fester a little too long, it will burn you.

Negative thoughts and their corresponding emotions, deplete your psychic energy. You will be irritable and impatient in your interactions with others. In return, others will reciprocate your moods and reactions, further darkening your world. The Bible says, You are only hurting yourself with your anger. (Job 18:4) Negative thoughts and emotions (anxiety, anger, and depression) trigger damaging hormones and neurotransmitters (cortisol and adrenaline) that increase blood pressure and heart rate. For example, some neurotransmitters stimulate excessive acid production in the stomach and irritate the whole gastrointestinal system. Every cell in your body will suffer from the impact of these chronic traumas. In fact, victims of their own negative thoughts and emotions age prematurely and shorten their life spans.

Some people indulge in their anger as if it were an entitlement. Their expressions of hate become a source of power, and they use their negative emotions as allies against their enemies. They don't realize that negative emotions are enemies destroying from within. Get rid of negatives by walking away from them. Search for a positive view of a negative experience, or overwhelm negative emotions with positive ones, as if they were antidotes to a poison. Even better, vaccinate yourself against negative emotions-cultivate an all-loving attitude that preemptively dissipates all negative feelings. I have a nature-oriented version of this tactic that I've drawn from my modest gardening experience: plant more perennials if you want to get rid of weeds. The Bible says, Fill your minds with those things that are good and that deserve praise: things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and honorable. (Phil. 4:8)

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T. Byram Karasu, M.D. is the author of The Spirit of Happiness

 



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T. Byram Karasu, M.D., is Silverman Professor of Psychiatry at Albert Einstein. He is the author of many books including The Art of Serenity.

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