The Introvert's Corner

Thanks for posting about this book! I've had a lot of trouble finding a church that's a good fit for me, and this article has helped me identify that introvert/extrovert struggle in my own spiritual life. What a great perspective!

Concepts like communion and Bible study and agape feasts seems to be extrovert-biased. I too have been staying away from church, and one of the reasons is this pro-extrovert bias.

Which is unfortunate. While God may be a "relational God", I don't think he loves the introverts any less, or considers them less than extroverts, regardless of society's biases.

I was raised Catholic, and I always dreaded the "let us offer each other this sign of peace" part, where we'd have to shake hands with all of our neighbors in a 360-degree circle. GAH!

Then I went to a Friends meeting (Quaker), where all 75 people spent the entire hour in silence. YES! Now there's a group I can live with.

great interview! I am a naturally introverted pastor's wife and this article said what I have so often thought! Thanks!

A brilliant interview subject for me. I needed to hear this and i am off to buy the book. Many thanks.

This was a great interview - thanks for posting!

"...but I have been tempted to limit my relationships and not share much of myself" really struck a nerve for me - definitely something to think about.

The quote from Isaiah "In quietness and in trust shall be your strength" was meaningful as well.

I will have to check out Adam's new book!

I am more than 2/3 the way through the book and I find it inspiring and encouraging. While it is written from the standpoint of the faith community, there are applications for all of life's situations.

There is more than one Evangelical Church that could perhaps have avoided devastating fractures if certain parties had known what I have found on the pages.

The wounds of religion take a long time to heal...if at all.

Sherry

Interestingly, when I was in rabbinical school, in one of our classes, we all took the Meyers-Briggs all but two of us turned out to be strongly introverted. It turns out that this is extremely common among rabbis (at least among the Conservative and Orthodox movements) because we spend so much of our time studying in chevruta (study partners of two) - so much of being a rabbi has to do with things that introverts love - the study, the study and the more study.

While there is certainly an ecstatic tradition in Judaism (it's actually somewhat more known because that group likes to dress up in a way that is obvious to people who aren't part of it, and so they stand out more) Judaism is a great place for introverts because the tradition is so strongly about learning, and the tradition is that it's done in pairs

I wanted just take a moment to let you know that your putting together this interview is much appreciated; not just because of its subject matter (which is enlightening and inspiring), but because you mention that you do not attend a Church or Synagogue, yet you remain objective and respectful. It's refreshing!

I suppose I didn't consider the possibility of being an introvert until I read this, so I am grateful for its being brought to light! It hit closer to home than I would have thought. I now need to go out and get this book.

Thanks to my good friend Josh for the link, to Ms. Dembling for the post, and Pastor McHugh for the book.

I enjoyed this article because being an introvert and spiritual person myself, I can now see why I've made certain choices in my own religious path. As Adam mentioned, many churches are popping up today that put a heavy emphasis on socializing and outward expressions of faith. While I have no problem with the idea of fellowship, I've always been most comfortable in a more quiet setting. My family is Protestant and living in the Midwest, I've been a part of a couple of those 'Mega-churches' in the past and it was just too much for me. They were great for some people...but unfortunately not me. Though I converted not just for the environment but also the belief system, I found a home in the Catholic church that has been much better suited for my personality and personal convictions. I found it amusing that Pat mentioned above the uncomfortable moments of "peace be w/ you"...that ain't nothing compared to the whooping and hollering in some other churches. :)

It's so nice to know that not only are there other people who feel as I do, but other Christians do, too. There is such huge pressure in the church (or at least in my church) to "share your gifts" and "spread the word". I feel like I'm expected to do a lot of things I'm not good at, i.e. making insta-friends and being super-gregarious. I'd much rather talk to people one-on-one or sing during worship time.

I just read this book, and it's marvelous. Very encouraging for an introvert in ministry work.

Jesus had plenty of introverted tendencies! He taught in para

I had to read "the heart is a lonely hunter" before I realized that Jesus leaving the company of the disciples was PART OF THE LESSON in Mark 1. "All men seek for thee" is the point. And it is not a conclusion one can come to when 'thee' is always around.

Healing and compassion, however, were his nature, yet he felt his essence go out of him (Mark 5:30, etc). He told those who were healed numerous times not to tell anyone what he'd done. Most pastors frame this as some sort of insidious mystical lesson instead of overlooking the obvious: he did not want to be bothered. AND doing miracles was not his job. I think that's the *real* reason he refused to "give signs" when asked. It wasn't obstinacy on his part or unworthiness on the parts of those asking. It's that it wasn't his job, but "that you [those who *wanted to*] might believe," he did miracles and showed signs anyway -- that's a total introvert's way of dealing with others' baggage!

I think he needed time alone to recharge and if he happened to "pray" it was because his thoughts naturally inclined toward the spiritual. I personally suspect he wasn't really praying all the time.

I wish we could get people to stop spiritualizing or demonizing alone time. The man was human, too. That was sort of the point of his ministry.

In my country The Netherlands (that's in Europe ;-) ) it is common Protestant practice to visit a morning and afternoon Sunday service at church.

But Protestant churches, services are social events to a tremendous degree. It's 'see and be seen'. After church, people often chat and sometimes we drink coffee together. Often, I try to 'escape', so I can wait for my husband in de car. By the time we get home, I am exhausted.

As a result, I usually only visit the morning service. After all, Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest, not one of exhaustion. I know that people frown on my one church visit Sundays.

I would rather read or pray at home alone. And it is not because I dislike my fellow church-goers, but because of the way that services have turned into major social events.

I'm really interested in the book and I will see if I can order it here, on the other side of the big pond.

Bless you all!