The Good Life

Thanks for an interesting piece.

I hear a lot of folks in the oldest of generations discussing how everything started "going wrong" when people stopped knowing their neighbors - meeting together on porches or just generally mingling with those around them.

I wonder, after reading your piece, what effect having an internet based third place would have on an individual. Clearly you did not list "chat rooms" or "social networking cites" as examples of third places, and yet many of my more internet addicted associates would argue that their chat rooms or websites of choice fit all the qualifications you listed as a "third place".

Thank you for a genuinely good idea, one that did not occur to me. Kind of ironic given that I posted the thoughts I did have on this website. Maybe it's a generation thing. I will ponder your idea and its implications. Maybe computer-using people in Starbucks really are socially engaged, just not with those sittiing next to them. Chris Peterson

a great third place requiring little effort to enter is your own neighborhood, discovered by walking your dog....provides simple face-to-face connections with neighbors.....washing their windows, raking/blowing their leaves, decorating their houses with the grandkids, taking the kids for a sail (we live on a creek), etc etc

Oh good article. I've thought about this myself.

If you've ever seen the movie "Dazed and Confused" they have a rec center where the teenagers hang out, shoot pool, etc. I never had that growing up, but I thought it was a great idea.

Virtual "third places" like chat rooms are definitely becoming more popular. I like face-to-face better though.

Bars are the only realistic "third places" I can think of. They get people from your town, and if you go to the same one regularly you start to recognize people. There's no smoking in bars in MD, which is the BEST LAW EVER. If you nurse your drink (can be non-alcoholic) slowly and get something to snack on, you won't spend too much money.

Some older folks are members of lodges and country clubs. I don't know anything about these lodges except sometimes they are men-only. No thanks.

I read this piece with great interest. In my work with homeless adults, what is most amazing is the effort and interest all people have with getting and staying connected. In my life outside of work, walking my dog, in the neighborhood or at the local dog park, is my sweetest way of checking in with people in my life.

I lived for many years both in Europe and the US and found that in the US since WWII we value private places, not public places.

Many of my friends in Manhattan and Paris live in shoe boxes but when they want to connect and socialize they go out walk 5 minutes and find a nice comfortable, visually pleasing coffee house, deli or cafe and hang out.

In pedestrian friendly, emotionally nourishing built environments we can use public places as our living rooms. We can live in a dump but when we step outside we are nourished by the beauty, the friendliness of the architecture and the social interaction. And...it's free.

This is not available in suburban landscapes, and many higher density downtown showcase hip/cool/hi-tech/leading edge buildings that are interesting and unusual but which are also sterile and disconnected to human feelings. They may show well in magazine glossy photos but glass and steel buildings with weird angles do not create pedestrian friendly streets that one can use as an extended living room so to speak.

Yes we do need Third Places !!!!!!!!!

I totally agree that we are missing 3rd places, and I would love a return of 3rd places in our culture! I also believe that there are many types of groups that have sprung up to meet this void - although these are poor substitutes, I think these serve some of those community needs:
- Sports team/clubs (softball, bowling, soccer, triathlon clubs)- these are incredibly popular among Gen-X folks and middle-aged folks
- Card/game clubs: this can cross generations
- Book clubs: this tends to be a female phenomenon
- Poker clubs: this tends to be a male phenomenon (my dad has been part of a 20 year poker group)
- Online forums/chat rooms: these definitely take on a different flavor because the technology is different.

Perhaps the best example of this in popular culture is the TV show Cheers. I think it's totally ironic that during college, I had 5 roommates, and we all got together in the evenings to watch re-runs of Cheers together. So how has TV changed our community habits?

Cheers,
== niki

I am actually studying third places and writing an ethnographic essay on a local third place right now. We are basing it on Oldenburg's work, and he chat rooms will not work. Oldenburg specifically states in his essay "The Problem of Place In America" that the third place is as distinct as the home or office. A third place involves interaction with a live person; talking over the table to each other. There is a mixture of beliefs and experiences to be shared. Generally chat rooms are attracting people who all like the same thing and usually are talking about a specific subject. Besides, if all you do is chat on the internet and you don't have any live human interaction, it leaves an empty feeling. It's not a way to share a drink and have some good times. It's just typing and reading a message. That's why work place breaks are becoming more than just a break from work. People are craving that live human interaction. The third place needs to be a "place" that you can go in without a meeting to just hang out and be around friendly people.