Here’s an story I tell in Marriage Rules:
Two little kids who are playing together in a sandbox with their pails and shovels. Suddenly a huge fight breaks out and one of the kids runs away screaming, “I hate you! I hate you!” In no time at all they’re back in the sandbox playing together happily again.
Two adults observe the interaction from a nearby bench. “Did you see that?” one asks. “How do children do that? They were enemies five minutes ago. “
“It’s simple” the other replies. “They choose happiness over righteousness.”
We can save ourselves a great deal of suffering if we strive to be more like those kids. Folks in long-term relationships have a terrible time stepping aside from anger and hurt, because our need to be right keeps us from getting back in that sandbox until the other person admits that he started it and is totally wrong. We lock ourselves into negativity at the expense of happiness and well-being.